Age 20 – Still in flatline at 120 days (I was bad – ED even with porn)

I will break it down from month to month. Will go in detail on the first month, because there were a lot of changes.

Progress

Month 1

Day 1 to 7

• Clarity of mind (Zero mental fog)
• Strong sexual urges to PMO
• Extremely comfortable in social situations
• Drive
• Motivation
• High energy
• Happiest I’ve been in over 10 years!
• No anxiety
• Open to new experiences. Everything seems so new and exciting!
• Insane mood swings
• Crystal clear mind
• Felt like a kid again, but with the manliness testosterone gives you
• Insomnia at day 6-7 (extra: on day 7, i noticed some hair grew on my back)

Overall, the first week was also a roller coaster of emotion, but felt really good that week.

Day 8-14 (Transition into the flatline)

• Slightly Lethargic
• Less energy
• Less drive
• “neutral mood” to everything
• Some mental fog
• Less need to socialize
• Occasional feeling of isolation and depression
• Some anxiety

Starting from day 15 <Flatline>

• Extremely low libido
• Almost no random erections
• No urges to PMO
• Depression
• Anxiety
• No energy
• Feeling of loneliness/isolation
• Fear
• Racing thoughts
• Sleepiness during the day
• Heavy mental fog (Can’t think straight/creatively, forgetfulness, memory problems)
• Social anxiety
• Everything is dead and I see no beauty in life
• Numbed pleasure response to everything

Month 2

<Flatline>

Month 3

<Flatline>

Month 4

<Flatline>

• Decided to do one MO intentionally at day 104 to see if libido would come back. Nothing happened. (The flatline is very scary, I was desperate. I read on YBOP that this worked for some people who experience very long flatlines)

(I will reset my counter after I’m done recovering. For now, I want to keep it to keep writing reports, and one MO is really not significant at this point)

• Insane urges to watch P (They come and go)

End

Considering I’ve abused PMO for the last 12 years of my life (since age 8, ’till now at age 20), I know it’s going to take me a longer time than others. When I say “abused PMO”, I mean that I was addicted to pleasure, and used PMO to stimulate myself throughout the day. During my early teen years, (13-16), I would go 5-10 times a day watching P and MO’ing. At about age 19, I couldn’t PMO as much anymore because I couldn’t even get it up to P anymore. It got to the point where I’d PMO even with a half-erection just to get the dopamine release. An O wouldn’t even satisfy me anymore.

Good luck. I’m still going through hell. God, it’s mental torture. I sure hope this is all worth it in the end.

Stay strong.

LINK – 120-Day Breakdown