I got ED without being addicted to porn. The key thing is that I would use porn to masturbate 98% of the time I masturbated over a period of 4 years. That was enough.
First off, let me state what position I was in when I discovered YBOP, as my situation may be similar to yours. I was almost 21, and I was a late bloomer which in my case meant I was a virgin. I had been exposed to porn at the age of 14 I believe, but had only gotten access to internet porn at the age of 17. So, I had been using it to masturbate for 4 years, fairly regularly.
I was never addicted in the strict sense of that word. I did not have cravings for it (apart from the urge to masturbate, porn just facilitated that urge for me). I did not use it in excess – on average I probably PMO’d 2 to 3 times a week. In short, I just used porn as it made arousal more vivid at the time, but it never pulled me into a full-blown addiction.
How did I discover YBOP? I felt it was time for me to lose my virginity, I felt ready and decided I wouldn’t hold back any more. I’d had a lot of girls hit on me the previous year and I always got myself out of situations that were leading to sex – I just chickened out, don’t ask me why. I just decided: this summer, I’m getting myself laid. So, I got together with a girl I had known for a while and I would get boners while we were making out, but as soon as it got more intense and we were alone – when sex was imminent – I would go soft. She didn’t notice at first as she had her period and did not want to go through with it any way, and I disregarded it as just nerves. A few days later however, I made a point to be relaxed and I was; we were having a great time. I still could not get hard enough. Words cannot describe how much that perplexed me. I’m young, I’m healthy, I’m confident, and I’m a frickin’ virgin – I should even be premature, let alone not even able to get hard in a situation like that. I forced myself to masturbate to porn the next morning when she left (as stupid as it sounds now), to reassure myself that everything works down there. I did get to orgasm, but I wasn’t hard even then and it took me a lot of effort to get there. This was a warning sign for me. Nevertheless, I thought it was psychological, not neurological and so I contemplated for the rest of the day and resolved to try again that night. I did get hard enough to have sex, but I wasn’t hard enough to make it fun for either of us and I could barely feel anything down there. I felt I was losing my erection DURING sex, and I realized that I was subconsciously picturing scenes from porn videos to keep myself hard. With closed eyes. And a real life hot chick under me.
So, the next day Google was my friend and I found this place. I spent all afternoon reading posts from you guys and identified with a lot of them. I deleted all the porn from my hard drive and did not watch a single porn video since. That was 5 months ago. It was tempting, but I never came close to relapsing because I realized how much I had fucked myself up, and I remembered the sense of embarrassment at not being able to get hard in the prime of my life.
At first I did not masturbate at all for a month. I felt my libido coming back though, and I had not watched porn so I did a little edging. That finally ended up in full blown masturbation but without porn. I did it very rarely though, about once every 2 weeks. That did slow my progress however, it was not until now (150 days later) that I feel rebooted. I also went back to reading Playboy magazine about 2 months ago, but I never masturbated TO the photos, I just occasionally let them arouse me and then I would masturbate without looking at them. I would also try to only use photos of one girl to arouse me. Anyways, I haven’t felt the need to do that in a month now, as I get an erection at the drop of a hat and masturbation without porn is just as fun as it used to be, even better.
I no longer have the performance anxiety that ED initially gave me as I feel there is no way that is going to happen to me next time. I’ve been holding back thus far, but I’m gonna go through with it when the next opportunity presents itself, and I’ll update my post with the results. Cheers! And happy new year guys.