After 4 years of trying to beat this addiction I am proud to say that I finally made it to 90 days [hardmode]. I have been trying and trying for 4 years (since the 12th grade) and nothing has worked!
I was feeling frustrated and I just hated myself, but I feel like I needed to grow in all areas in order for me to finally make it. I grew up and I made it finally. 90 days complete. I reached my goal and there is no stopping now.
The reason why I have gotten on the NoFap journey was because porn was ruining my life in many ways. I felt like it dominated my life (addiction) to the point where I was miserable and super unhappy with myself. I could feel my mind just being “icky” and just unstable in a way.
I first started NoFap 4 years ago when I was in the 12th grade (I’m 21 now) because I wanted to stop a porn addiction but also because I heard of all the “superpowers” that came with it.
The last straw that really MADE me quit was that I have a friend who is addicted to porn and he’s in a relationship but thanks to his porn addiction his relationship was ruined. They were so happy together but his girlfriend couldn’t trust him and it turned ugly. So I said to myself “damn I want to recover from this before I get a girlfriend” so I did.
Yes the superpowers are real but it’s not a cure for your life. YOU are the cure.
These are the benefits:
• More energy
• Less anxiety (although you need to control it by meditating, exercising etc)
• More focus (maybe because addiction doesn’t consume your mind 24/7)
• Feel more confident and in control.
• Yes girls look at you more. You get some sort of aura (I am good-looking so maybe that helps) BUT you get the aura of an attractive man. It’s weird.
• Better energy for the gym.
• Better discipline and self-control.
• Desire to change your whole life.
• You’re less desperate for a girlfriend/getting laid because you’re not consumed by false expectations of sex. Trust me, this is a HUGE one because every single girl I talked to talked to me about how they feel like shit because they can’t satisfy a porn-addict.
• You’re just a happier person=Less Depression,Anxiety etc plus I believe in the whole science of NoFap.
I am 21 years old and I started using when I was 13.
EARLIER POST [2 years earlier]
Never though I would make it to 30, hers my story… I hit rock bottom. I hit it HARD. I was 17 years old, depressed, anxious, frustrated and about to pull the trigger (I am not talking about fapping). As a 17 year old, you expect life to be great. Knowing where you want to go, college? Pursuing your dreams? Girls? Money? Health? All these things came into my mind that horrible fateful day, couldn’t sleep, woke up at 2 am and fell asleep at 11 pm until 2 pm, my body was aching like no other, had thoughts of quitting it all. No friends, no GF, no job, no motivation…”what was the point?”
I used to say. This is not a story how I “fatefully” ran into NO-FAP and saved my life, no, it was way before that. I knew something was wrong, I knew something had to change. EVERYDAY WAS THE SAME DAMN THING. Reading “motivational” books, looking at “motivational” videos and all that B.S. No. It is not B.S. Motivational books DO help but it has to be followed by ACTION and sometimes LOTS of action.
I used to be the guy who complained but never done anything about it, “why this”, “why that”, “why me” blah blah blah couldn’t believe that I believed in my own bullshit. Yes, there are things that you can’t do shit about, but you know what you CAN do? YOU.
Being in a family who is frustrated as you are, it is hard. Something was always going on. I was weak emotionally, physically and mentally. I used to always get angry. I used to be kid who let his emotions get the best of him. That is where it all started. I said enough is enough and took 100% responsibility for my life, I looked at what wasn’t working, what I needed to change about myself and had life goals for the first time.
I started being “no more Mr. Nice guy” and yes, I did become somewhat of an asshole sometimes but it was my ego that needed to be inflated for me to get out of this hellhole. In the 12th grade I was everything that YOU don’t want to be, Insecure, Low-self-esteem, really shy, awkward, bad at school, no talent, broke, not good with females, and of course jacking off to porn. That was my drug, every time I felt any pain, then POP! I looked at P and masturbated like 6 times. I was tired of being tired.
I started doing things MY way and it worked. I started working my ass off and not listening to my weak self, I endured and graduated high-school with a 3.7 GPA, but that wasn’t enough. Started searching was I could go to school for a while and thanks to my grades I got a scholarship to a good school where I live, but that wasn’t enough. I was sick of being skinny so I got a pass to the gym, worked hard as hell and gained 15 pounds of muscle until now, but that wasn’t enough.
When I got into college I worked hard and my first semester’s grade was a 3.7 GPA again, but that wasn’t enough. I was HUNGRY and I was ANGRY. I still didn’t have a large social group, felt like an outcast and sick of being alone. I started working on my social skills but not seeing any results yet. I looked up how to stop P addiction just as a joke, and NO-FAP popped up. I started reading it and started laughing on how dumb some people were, then I read the BENEFITS. I WAS DRAWNED IN. I read all these benefits and I just got excited to start the challenge! I just wanted to try it out and see if it really worked out.
Just like I thought 5 days in…I felt horrible, I felt more anxious (panic attacks), I felt more depressed and still shitty. Then 10 days hit, I started to feel better, anxiety was less, girls were checking me out! And attractive girls too! Also I had more energy and more motivation to do things and then came a flatline. I didn’t know what that was, I felt worse than before, my anxiety was way high, really awkward but I mean really awkward and I felt fatigued. I searched it up and yep, this was a flatline but I didn’t give up this time! Nope!
I relapsed 10 times before it finally clicked but this time was different. I managed to hit the big 3-0! Oh my gosh, it wasn’t easy my friends, it wasn’t easy but it was so worth it. I changed throughout this journey, I sticked through it and this was the benefits I have gained:
- High Self-Confidence: This came with having self-control and not giving into things that bonded us, working on yourself and having more “clean” thoughts because of fantasizing about every girl you see. Working on yourself and having a different attitude and mindset about life and yourself is a MUST if you want high confidence. I have been taking lots of care of myself like going to the gym (gained 10 pounds since December), eating healthy (clean bulk) and always challenging myself.
- Way High Sex Drive= Lots of Energy and Motivation: Oh my, oh my, this is something that is my total favorite out of all the benefits, I have lots of more energy and motivation to do things. I slept for 4 hours lately and for some reason I had energy and felt fine, not like before when I felt like I was gonna die. This also helps in talking to woman which also helps with
- More confidence talking to woman: This one is HUGE, well atleast for me. I used to be super shy and afraid talking to woman and now it is A LOT easier but I mean A LOT. I also DO get more attention from woman, I am able to keep eye contact and smile! Plus I have never had the confidence to do that!!! And it is amazing how much confidence you get from not PMOing. Trust me on this. Also recommend on improving yourself socially and with woman, look up online on tips or whatever and PRACTICE. You will mess up sometimes but with this new confidence you will be less afraid of taking risks.
- Improvement Socially: This is another big one, yesterday with my family gathering (just guys) went out to eat and I was the “life of the party”, I was always the shy, quiet kind no one wanted to listen too but I sorta have been treated differently by how I spoke and communicated with people. I still have LOTS to learn but it is amazing! I can now go up and speak to people more easily than before, I still sorta fear breaking the ice but I feel awesome and trust myself. Still need to build a social circle though.
- Less-Anxiety: THIS ONE IS THE BEST. I have/had GAD and I always get panic attacks and whatnot but since I stopped fapping, I had WAY less anxiety! It’s amazing. I have more energy and less “worries”, something that helps a lot it taking better care of yourself, going to the gym, eating very healthy, getting SLEEP which is huge in this. I still get anxious and sometimes panicky but it doesn’t last as long as before.
- More happy about the “little things”, I have more time enjoying myself and happy about Nature and family. Its amazing how my dophamine is now “fixed”, less depressed, and anxious. I am loving the results.
Loving the results, I am really happy I stopped. I have been thinking to only go 30 days but since now I am a believer I am going for 90 days and beyond! Its really worth it guys. It will change your mind, body and spirit. I am going to continue challenging myself and improving everyday. See you at 90.