What an incredible experience! Overall most of the things I’ve been through over the last 90 days are the same stuff that pops up on this forum all the time. Around day 30-40 I had so much energy I thought I was going to explode. I mean I would work out and jog or hike every single day and it wasn’t enough. Shortly after that I had one of the infamous flatlines until day 70 or so. I’ve picked up hobbies, read a lot of books, and basically quit gaming which was taking up too much of my time. That’s the main of it, but let me elaborate on my story for people who care.
First off some background info. I’ve struggled with depression and social anxiety since starting college 6 years ago. Like a lot of people here I’ve been living like a zombie since then, living only for porn and games to be honest. I wasn’t always like that so I knew something was wrong, but I didn’t know what or how to fix it.
For years now I’ve been eating healthy and exercising regularly to try and work my way out of these issues, with some success but not enough. People around me think I’m a health freak, but they don’t realize I’m just trying to improve my mind. So I graduated from grad school in December and began looking for a job. I thought I had one lined up already but it fell through, still though I thought it would be relatively easy to find one. After months of failed interviews I realized I had a problem to take care of or else I would never find anything, and I happened to stumble on the ted talk that’s linked in this forum. The science sounded reasonable, so I figured it was worth a shot.
After a month like I said I saw huge improvements in my energy, and I started finding pleasure from so many things that I hadn’t before. For so long if I wasn’t watching porn or gaming I couldn’t be happy, but now I find simple things so pleasurable. It’s like after so long I finally remember what it feels like to be truly happy! It’s an amazing feeling I can’t really describe it. Life had become a chore, but now it’s an adventure full of possibilities. Along with this I see so much potential for my future, and I feel SO EXCITED to live my life now!
Before I wasn’t sure where I was headed and I don’t think I really cared, but holy shit now I see so many possibilities and I KNOW that I am capable of achieving great things. But while I have big plans I also feel more content with who I am. Before I was doing everything to try and prove something I guess you could say, now I feel like I could stay right where I’m at and be fine with myself. I found a job about a month ago, I walked in confident and personable to the interview unlike before.
Overall I just feel so much more confident, have gotten rid of brain fog, and feel so much more connected to life. As far as women go I have had sex with one girl a few times in the last couple weeks, other than that I’ve been on hard mode. I don’t see us having a future though. I don’t feel at all desperate like I used to or else I would probably hold onto her but right now I’m not really looking for a relationship.
I think my assertiveness and confidence seems to be a real turn on to women. I do feel more manly like some people on here have claimed. It’s a great feeling to just do things without over thinking your actions, just being in the now like someone was saying earlier today. It’s how I felt before college and I couldn’t figure out why I had lost it. It really makes my humor and wit come out I think.
Overall I am so proud of myself for having the will to improve, and the improvements I’ve made have been amazing! I’m really looking forward to living my life. Also this forum is such an awesome place, everyone here is so supportive of each other and looking to improve themselves. It’s really impressive!
LINK – My 90 day journey