Hey guys. It’s been a while. I don’t think this is a place where people are remembered well by their names, but by their stories.
I posted that story about walking my sister down the aisle at her wedding. This was about two months into noFap. There was so much good happening in my life at that point. Where I’m at now is the continuation of that place. It’s the new normal for me. No porn. No masturbating. No “edging” (which is masturbating). Guys, I’m really happy. I’m not always ecstatic but I’m so much better off than when I started this. The fog of PMO has left. In the last 6 months (I had one relapse) I’ve gone from being out of shape, depressed, uninspired at work and single to finishing a 5K, being at my lowest weight since high school, being happier in general , being an inspiration to others and being known as a man who gets extra done at work.
At around day 90, I started getting some problems with my mood. I was easy to anger and aggressive. I’m fine being aggressive, but the anger wasn’t really who I was. With time, my mood has evened out. I’m not depressed, I’m not hypervigilant or angry. I’m just happy to be me. I’m truly comfortable in my own skin. That’s an incredible gift.
Today, I’m off work because of Columbus Day (pretty bogus but I’m fine with it). Until I started writing this, the thought that I could beat off to porn never entered my mind. Don’t worry. I don’t think I could if I tried.
What I’ve learned is that giving into temptation in that way (and others) prevents me from being the man I am meant to be. Like a light switch cannot be on and off at the same time, I can’t be a man and use PMO.
Maybe the best part of this is a new relationship. About a month ago, I got a girlfriend. This is after two years of being single. She is a terrific young woman. Beautiful, caring, hard-working. Our relationship would not work if I was the guy I used to be. NoFap has revealed more of who I really am and I am eternally grateful to this community.
If you are struggling, keep going. Find a strategy that works for you because as much pleasure as you get from it, porn is stealing from you. Flee the lies and run toward the truth–the truth that you can be a man. As always, if you have questions or you want advice, just ask. I’d love to help someone along this road.
LINK – The New Normal