I’ll start by saying that everyone who’s looking to improve the sexual and relationship parts of their lives needs to start NoFap. Before NoFap, life was good, except I had a big void when it came to romantic relationships. Since ending my PMO addiction that’s completely changed.
A little over a year ago, at 27, I was at the peak of my porn / masturbation addiction. It was bad. I would masturbate every day in front of my computer to temporarily relieve my sexual anxiety.
I had only been in one short relationship at 24. Although we weren’t long-term potential, the relationship would have lasted longer if it weren’t for my social awkwardness and performance anxiety in bed. Even though she was really attractive I couldn’t bring myself to orgasm during sex. I started reading about NoFap around this time and decided that it might be a solution, but I didn’t have the willpower to try.
Fast forward to 3 years later, I met a girl that I knew I’d really want to be in a relationship with. For 3 months I almost let my anxieties get the best of me and barely talked to her, but thanks to a lot of alcohol I mustered the courage to invite her to my bed to cuddle. Score! … Although I’ve learned that despite my months of interest in her and subtle moves, I wasn’t on her radar as more then an acquaintance before that night :-/
With the poor performance in bed from my previous girlfriend in mind I kept things light, and only made out and cuddled. 5 days later she came over and was all over me and definitely wanted sex. I was able to give her an orgasm, but my anxiety was so bad that I didn’t even get an erection. To defend myself I told her I masturbated earlier that day.
The next day I had to leave for week. I remembered NoFap and decided to start it for real this time, with hopes of keeping this relationship going.
NOFAP SAVED ME!
Things didn’t get better right away. My anxiety even got worse for the first few weeks. But what I started noticing is that because I wasn’t able to FAP, I had more motivation then ever to be in a relationship. Instead of PMO to relieve my urges, I was always thinking about how to better myself to keep the girl.
- I worked on my posture
- I worked on my social skills
- I started reading more
- I became more well rounded with hobbies
I can’t pinpoint exactly when things started to change, but now:
- I don’t think about porn ever
- The few times I’ve watched porn, it’s done nothing for me
- I don’t have any issues during sex with ED
- Erection quality is amazing and random erections are a normal thing.
- I’m excited to not masturbate because i know it’s going to improve my relationship life.
I’ve masturbated about 4 times since starting NoFap — the first time was well after 90 days. Each time was because i had to clear my head of sex to help get through a tough time or thought process. I don’t regret it and I’m not resetting my counter because it hasn’t caused me to reset to how I used to be.
Interestingly, each time I didn’t need porn and it only took me a few minutes. That would have been impossible for me before NoFap.
Where I’m at now
I’m in an amazing relationship with that girl who I drunkenly invited to my bed to cuddle. We live together now and I still try every day to keep her loving me. I’ve talked to her about my porn habits and it’s become an inside joke between us.
I’ve seen some claims of NoFap leading to enlightenment and experiencing the world differently. I didn’t get any of that. I still see, taste, and hear things the same, nothings changed spiritually, my body fat/muscle composition is still the same, I still have issues with being lazy and procrastinating, and my social awkwardness is a constant work in progress.
The main thing NoFap has done is changed my addiction of watching porn and masturbating to focusing on bettering myself to be the guy girls want to be with. That aspect my life has changed completely for the better. If you feel like the sexual and relationship parts of your life are stuck and you haven’t followed through with NoFap, then stop fapping now – it works!