This has been a transformative experience. First 30 days were hard-mode. Second 30 days were standard-mode, had sex a few times with a previous partner and a hookup.
Moving forward into 2015 I’m switching to easy-mode. I feel rebooted from porn, and personally, that is my enemy much more than masturbation or orgasm. I’m wary of creating internal barriers against having free and pleasurable orgasms, so here on out, I’ll be masturbating when I’m really feeling it.
But it’s different now. The break from porn has freed me from the constant or immediate “I’m lonely so I’m going to masturbate to make myself feel better for five minutes.” I don’t think about porn, and I don’t feel shame about being sexual or having desires. I’m firmly committed to not going back to porn, and I’m going to keep reading all of your inspirational stories to help me along and keep me vigilant about relapse.
One of the best parts of this transformation has been about communication. I wrote a blog post about giving up porn when I was a month in. It was a little awkward when my mom was the first one to comment on it, but it has sparked a lot of great conversation with friends and strangers (and even my mom!). Porn doesn’t have to be the silent killer that it is. There are loads of people out there who are receptive to hearing about the benefits and joys of quitting porn, and many of them can be our allies in this movement. It’s something people don’t think they can talk about, but once they start it’s liberating and educational for everyone.
I have experienced a lot of the benefits people talk about on this sub, as well. I’ve written about 80% of a book in the 60 days I’ve been off porn. I’m starting a business that should launch in March or April. I feel more confident and attractive, and have become much more direct in pursuing relationships with women. Eye contact has shot way up. I feel more in touch with my masculinity, largely because of no longer feeling shame and guilt so much of the time.
I feel like this transformation happened fast and effectively for me because I had seen it coming for a long time. I wasn’t nearly so deep in the vicious cycle of PMO as many men out there, so I’m not suggesting that 60 days should be enough for everyone to switch to easy mode. I’m so grateful for having found this community, and I really wish you all the best in this monumental journey. It really is life changing.