September 2011 was my last time of PMO, and my discovery of yourbrainonporn. Since then i’ve come a long way, with ups and downs (mostly ups lately!) and i haven’t done any PM and only O with my girlfriend. Its amazing how true yourbrainonporn was, and what it has done for me.
At the start i was suffering from porn induced E.D., now most of the times i get an erection easily, sometimes without my penis being touched even and with just caressing of the body. I had never thought that possible before!
With this i come to a small problem i still have. Today i made love, after about 2 weeks of not doing any sex, and i did get hard pretty fast, but then we talked for about a minute or so before the actual deed, and i was losing my erection while i knew i would soon ‘do it’. Why am i, after 10 months, still not completely cured and sometimes lose it a bit? Before today, for the last few months, this hasn’t happened i have to say.
Besides that the most important question: i notice that my ‘urge’/libido before i would do PMO was bigger as my ‘urge’/libido is now with my girlfriend. My libido was higher for PMO then for actual sex, even though i have more pleasure when making love to my girlfriend.
In my head i go over the differences; i could do PMO for a longer time, do exactly what i liked, there was no possibility of a ‘no’, no performance anxiety, and i have to say that sometimes after we do have sex, my girlfriend and i get into an argument after going over the details because she wants to know my progress (i don’t know if this is a reason i still get nervous and no libido). On the other hand; i now have more pleasure when having sex then in the past with PMO…
Does anyone recognize this? or maybe knows what is going on?
PS thanks to Marnia and Gary for their site, and to theunderdog for starting this forum!
LINK – 10 months of no PMO
BY – Parcival
Thanks for the response 🙂
I’m 34 years old so not a teen anymore but still age shouldn’t be a problem.
My girlfriend and i do foreplay indeed and thats getting me hard, as told before she doesn’t even have to touch my penis for that. So thats definately very good.
What i still have the most problems with, is with libido, the urge to go have sex. And thats also what my girlfriend has a very hard time with accepting. I say its because i was addicted, and addictions have very strong urges because, well, otherwise you wouldn’t be addicted to it and it would be very easy to stop. Then again, when having sex now, actually doing it gives more pleasure then the PMO did…
I also think about that the thought of going to do PMO in the past was the most exciting. Often when i had made myself exciting for a long time, the actual deed was… dissapointing. Now if i could get this exciting feeling before having actual sex now… thats what i’m looking for i guess. Thats ‘libido’ or how i kinda see it.
BTW i’ve started going to a group about a month ago, 10 men who have a porn addiction and 2 people accompanying us and i have to say it helps to see others struggling with the same thing, to see there are others and you’re not alone and that its a real problem not just of anonymous people. One thing i already learned there, is a nice tip… if you feel urges, go do something in the house, be it fixing some doorknob, mowing the lawn, etc… anything to get your mind of your addiction. Maybe i’ll post some more things which could be helpful when i hear them 🙂