91 days ago I was a mess. I was 48. My divorce was final. I was under employed. Sex was impossible, I didn’t get erections from anything other than porn. I was PMO’ing at least an hour a day and playing WoW at least 30 hours a week. I was isolated from my friends and family.
Today I’m 90 days porn free. I’ve cured my PIED and my DE. I’m in a relationship with an exciting woman who I thought was out of my league, I have a great new job, I’ve lost 10lbs, and everybody says I look like a new man.
How I got through the past 90 days
Get a porn blocker: Visiting porn sites are a habit, you sit down and type in a tube url. You need help in the first few weeks or you are in for a world of hurt.
Get mental discipline: the hardest part of this is keeping your mind from dwelling on thoughts of porn or fapping when they pop up. Meditate, yoga, martial arts or prayer are all good ways of getting there.
Do nofap: Doing nofap, certainly at the beginning was critical. With PIED there was basically no way for me to fap without porn, or without porn based fantasies. That doesn’t cure PMO. That is PMO. And you will come back to porn. I tried giving up porn before and the fapping just brought me back.
Do NOT edge: Edging is fapping and just prevents the rewiring from happening.
flatlining: I flatlined for a relatively short time, I think the strict no fap, no edging, no porn, no thinking about porn, no thinking about sex regimen at the beginning really helped.
hardmode: I don’t think I’m cut out for hard mode. The first 30 day nofap streak was easy because I flatlined but then it became difficult. Now I’m 22 days on easy mode and it is much less a problem, even with a gf that travels all … the … time. Once a week is all I was fapping anyway so sex even once a week or so tides me over.
stay busy: really. You PMO because of loneliness, boredom and isolation. Get the heck away from the computer and out of the house. I joined a running group.
Super powers are really just increased self confidence and the lifting of brain fog. You only get the effect if you actually do something with time and energy you get from defeating your porn habit. My super powers came from suddenly having an extra hour a day to live my life, extra energy from not fapping and doing positive things with that time and energy. The first thing I did is kick my WoW habit. Which gave me almost 40 extra hours a week to do positive things AND a burst of confidence and positive feelings. I kicked two addictions in one week \o/
You have to chain the positives, use one success to start climbing the next mountain. I used the 40 hours to start being more social, to hang out with friends and hang around and chat with people at events. It was hard, but I had time and testosterone and I just gritted through it.
I worked out more, which helped my self confidence even more.
I started being more productive professionally. I nailed a contract and had a couple of good interviews and then landed a great job. This increased my confidence even more.
Then I used the increased confidence of those positive experiences to ask out a woman I met running and go on a couple of coffee dates.
Then I started making real progress with a woman and that helped even more.
My social anxiety is at a life time low at the moment, and it was all about using each little victory as a boost to fight the next battle.
Read those my two paragraphs again. I think the biggest super power is actually the changes you can accomplish in your life in such a short time if you are not in the throes of addiction.