Since beginning this quest on October 24, 2012, I have achieved the following life milestones and other cool things (yes, I’m bragging a little!): I am now in a relationship with an awesome Girlfriend, moved out from my parents, ran a marathon, I have a steadily growing net worth and I have no debts.
I have learned first aid (so my healing skills are up!), I am improving constantly with my gym goals while simultaneously gaining the respect of gym bros and brodettes, and I have an improved and improving outlook on life (most days; we all have our ups and downs!). (Please forgive the poor grammar!)
You must always keep in mind that this is a daily battle. Habits cannot be destroyed, but must be replaced (read The Power of Habit for insights on habits and how to change them). The one we all share here on r/NoFap must be replaced with one more conducive to an effective and fulfilling life. Anyways, to contribute to this community, here are a couple of lessons learned that have helped me along the way:
- Visually track your progress. Use a whiteboard, a sheet of paper, anything that will constantly remind you of what you are trying to accomplish. Here’s an example that worked for me: http://i.imgur.com/MGKYk.jpg.
- This technique worked for me: place a NF mark on right hand and the # of successful days that have passed. This will help you stay focused. Another example: http://i.imgur.com/fXO05.jpg. a. You might get questions but just make up some BS.
- Tell no one your goal of No Fapping (Here’s a TED Talk that explains why: http://www.ted.com/talks/derek_sivers_keep_your_goals_to_yourself?language=en).
- Walk away from your computer/source of triggers and use the energy somehow (push ups, pull ups, write in a journal, walk/jog/run/sprint, anything!). Just don’t Fap!
- Be careful of slippery slopes (There was a user here that explained what slippery slopes are quite well but I can’t seem to find it. Can someone help me out?)
- You will get what feels like extra energy. Use this wisely. Maybe pursue a goal and/or start a good habit(s). Read some good books. Practice talking to anyone and everyone (not just the sex you’re attracted to).
- Write out and list your priorities in life. Don’t keep it in your head. Determine your raison d’être (“reason for existence”). Keeping this list on hand will keep your hands occupied and busy.
- Start something that helps people and takes up a moderate amount of time. For me, I’ve started a gym corporate membership for my organization resulting in people saving money and a healthier nation!
- “In everything I’ve ever tried to do, I’ve always been willing to fail.” ~Arnold Schwarzenegger said something to this effect. Be willing to fail in this pursuit. Just be sure to PICK YOURSELF UP AGAIN and AGAIN.
- “One does not accumulate but eliminate. It is not daily increase but daily decrease. The height of cultivation always run to simplicity.” ~Bruce Lee. Use reddit as a tool, not as a time-waster. Subscribe to r/nofap, r/getmotivated, r/fitness and other sub-reddits that you think will help you. Unsubscribe from the distractions. You know full well which ones they are.
- Be around like minded people through r/nofap. This keeps in line with lesson #3 (telling no one your goal) while still collaborating and sharing experiences with anonymous strangers on-line.
That’s all for now! Fapstronauts, to infinity and beyond!