UNowa Yiba ISonto isicishamlilo sase-wildland, i-EMT, umfundisi, usomabhizinisi, isikhulumi nombhali. Eminyakeni engu-24 ubudala, ubuye abe ngumlutha we-porn osindayo. Njengoba ngiqale ukuhlangana nezithombe zobulili ezingcolile ze-intanethi ngineminyaka eyisishiyagalolunye, kwaze kwaba muva nje lapho abona khona ukuthi umkhuba wakhe wezocansi wawuyithinte kanjani inhlalakahle yakhe yezocansi nengokomzwelo. Ngemuva kokululama kwakhe, iSonto labhala phansi eyalo indaba njengohlobo lwe-catharsis, kepha kungekudala lakhula ngesihloko esifushane esingelona iqiniso, I-Wack: Inomlutha we-Porn Internet, ayikhipha ekuqaleni kwalo nyaka. Le ncwadi ngumzamo wokubheka ucwaningo lwamanje lokulutha lwe-porn, nokusiza abanye babone umphumela ongemuhle ongaba nawo ezimpilweni zabo, futhi ubalekele umlutha.
Enye yezinto ozisho esethulweni sakho ukuthi iqiniso lokuthi umphakathi wesayensi akukafanele ubhekane nenkinga yokuluthwa ngokocansi. Ngabe ucabanga ukuthi kunokuntuleka kokuvuma kobunzima benkinga, noma ingabe lokhu kungumsebenzi wohlelo lokubukeza kontanga, oluthatha isikhathi salo?
Isayensi ihlala ithatha isikhathi (futhi kufanele), kepha ukutadisha imiphumela yokusetshenziswa kwe-porn okungaguquguquki kunzima kakhulu. Ngokufanelekile, ukwenza kanjalo sizoqoqa iqembu elikhulu labantu abasha abangakaze bavezwe ezingcolile, sibahlukanise ngamaqembu amabili, sinikeze iqembu elilodwa ukufinyelela okungenamkhawulo kwi-porn ye-Intanethi ngenkathi sigcina elinye iqembu kude nalo ngokuphelele, bese silinganisa imiphumela eminyakeni edlule.
Kepha ngaphandle kokuthi sinzima kakhulu ngokwamalungiselelo, singahlangana nezithiyo eziningi zokuzama ukuzama ukusungula lokho kuhlolwa! Ngokwengeziwe, abantu abavamile ukukhuluma ngempilo yabo yezocansi kanye / noma nokusetshenziswa kocansi, futhi abasebenzisi be-porn bavame ukufihla umkhuba wabo noma (noma ikakhulukazi) kulabo abasondelene nabo. Esigcina ngakho yisigejane sabantu abangasebenzisi i-porn futhi abazi ukuthi kuyinkinga futhi neqembu labantu abasebenzisa i-porn kepha bazijabulisa kakhulu ukubhekana nokuthi kungenzeka ukuthi kuyinkinga futhi / noma banamahloni okukhuluma ngakho futhi bacele usizo.
Ngaphandle kobunzima, sibona ubufakazi obandayo bokuthi i-Intanethi porn yinto ekhuthaza kakhulu engadala izinguquko zesikhathi eside ebuchosheni eholela ekungasebenzi kahle ngokomzwelo nangokobulili. Ngoba i-Intanethi inikeza ukulethwa okungenamkhawulo kwezinto ezibonakalayo zamahhala, ezihlukahlukene, futhi ezifinyeleleka kalula, i-Intanethi porn ifana nenguqulo ehlungisiwe, egxilisiwe ye-smut esake sayithenga ezitolo ezikhethekile (njengoba i-cocaine iyindlela ehlanjululwayo yamaqabunga e-coca). Bheka lolu cwaningo ngaphandle kweCambridge ekhombisa umehluko ekusetshenzisweni kobuchopho kokuya ocansini phakathi kwabasebenzisi abaphoqayo nabalawulayo: Voon et al. (I-2014)
Ukusetshenziswa kwe-porn kubonakala kusondele kakhulu kubiquitous manje, kuzo zonke izinsizwa okungenani. Wack igxile kulabo abayimilutha. Usebenzisa izindlela zokuxilonga ze-DSM-V zokusebenzisa kabi izidakamizwa ozivumelanisa nazo ukubhekisa kumlutha we-porn, ucabanga ukuthi kukhona ababukeli abaningi bo-porn abangabekwa njengabangayimilutha?
Nginqikaza ukuqagela ukuthi bangaki abasebenzisi abangawela esigabeni “somlutha” uma kuqhathaniswa nesigaba “esingesona umlutha”. Umlutha yisikhathi esishelelayo nesilayishiwe, futhi akusho ukuthi abantu abaningi bacabanga ukuthi kusho ukuthini. Angikaze ngizicabange njengomlutha wezocansi, kepha ngithole i-9 kokuyi-11 ekuhlolweni kwami kokulutha (i-6 noma ngaphezulu ikhombisa ukulutha kanzima). Kungakhathalekile ukuthi yimaphi amalebula esiwasebenzisayo, noma kunjalo, okubaluleke kakhulu ukumane ubone ukuthi ukusetshenziswa kocansi kuyizinkinga yini ezimpilweni zethu, futhi indlela engcono yokuthola lokho ukuyeka ukuyisebenzisa okungenani izinyanga ezimbalwa futhi uqaphele impilo yethu iguquka kanjani ngaphandle kwayo.
Uma kunenani elikhulu labantu abangajabulela i-porn ngaphandle kokuba umlutha, ucabanga ukuthi lisenomthelela ojulile ngokwengqondo nangokomphakathi?
Kwabanye abantu, ubhiya buyisiphuzo esijabulisayo kepha esiphuzwa ngokuphelele, kanti abanye bangaba nobunzima bokuhamba isonto lonke ngaphandle kokuncika otshwaleni kuze kube yilapho ezinye izitshalo ezibilisiwe zibaluleke kakhulu kubo kunomndeni, ezempilo , kanye nentuthuko yomuntu. Sonke siyabazi abadakwayo abaphuthelwe ebhodleleni, kepha akuzona zonke izilingo eziluthayo yizinto, futhi ngeshwa isilinganiso se-hook ye-inthanethi ye-Internet empeleni siphezulu kakhulu kunotshwala. Ngoba ngokuyisisekelo sinentambo yokufuna ucansi, abantu abaningi abaningi ababheka i-Internet ezingcolile baba imilutha yezocansi kunabantu abaphuza ubhiya baba izidakwa.
Ukukhuluma ngami ngokwazi kwami, ukusetshenziswa kwe-porn okuphoqayo kwalimaza ubulili bami, imizwa yami, izinto eziza kuqala kimi, nekhono lami lokwakha ubudlelwano obunempilo. Ekucwaningweni kwebhuku lami ngithole ukuthi le miphumela nokuningi kusuka kude kunqabile phakathi kwabasebenzisi be-porn ye-Intanethi, futhi abaningi, abantu abaningi basebenzisa i-porn. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, selokhu ngashiya phansi ngithole isisusa sami, ubulili bami, ukuzihlonipha kwami, kanye nekhono lokuthanda nokuthandwa. Ngithembe, uhlobo lomuntu engingelona i-porn luyinto engcono kakhulu emphakathini.
Kumanothi akho ukuze alulame, awudonseli umugqa wokuziyeka ezintweni ezibonakalayo ezingcolile kakhulu kepha ufaka izinto ezikhuthaza kakhulu ezisezingeni eliphansi, njengama-movie avusa inkanuko, ukuphequlula kwe-Facebook okungenampilo, njll. Ngenxa yalokhu, kungaba okulungile ukusho ukuthi siphila ezweni eliya ezingcolile eliya kuthi, emazingeni aphansi, aqale ukubeka abantu empendulweni yokuphendula evuselela ku-porn?
Iningi labantu livame ukubona inani elikhulu kakhulu lokuqukethwe okuvuselela ezocansi ngemidiya enjengethelevishini, ukukhangisa, ne-Intanethi ukwedlula lokho abakwenzayo empilweni yangempela, futhi lokhu kungaqala ukusenza sicabange ngocansi njengento esiyibonayo kunokuthile lokho siyakwenza, ikakhulukazi kubantu abasha ababona konke lokhu ngaphambi kokuhlangabezana nezothando nezocansi kubo. Angikukhuthazi ukuthi wonke umuntu afihle amehlo akhe lapho kufika ezentengiselwano zangaphansi, kepha kubantu abayimilutha yezithombe ezingcolile zobulili umbono onjalo ungasibangela ukwehla komthambeka oshelelayo oholela ekubuyeleni emuva, ikakhulukazi ezigabeni zokuqala zokululama.
Njengoba sengiqalile ukusebenzisa i-porn eminyakeni engaba ngu-9, ngangikulungiselele kahle ubulili bami bezithombe zobulili ezingcolile kangangokuthi angikwazi ukufeza noma ukugcina ukwakheka kocansi lwangempela lapho kuvela ithuba. Ukuze ngibhale ngaphezulu iminyaka emide yokufaka i-libido yami esikrinini sekhompyutha, bekufanele ngizifundise ukulindela injabulo yobulili kuphela lapho nginomlingani wami. Lokhu kusho ukugwema ukuvuswa yinoma yiziphi izinto ezingamanga, ngisho nalabo abangafaneleki njenge "porn" ngayinye. Ngincoma okufanayo nakwabanye abayimilutha abatakula abafuna ukululama ngokushesha okukhulu ngaphandle kokubuyela emuva.
Inani lobufakazi owabelana nabo encwadini bunikeza umqondo womphakathi oxhaswa ngempela. Ngabe ucabanga ukuthi kubaluleke kangakanani lokhu ukusiza abantu hhayi nje ukuthi baphilise, kodwa futhi ubaqinisekise ukuthi ababodwa noma abahlaseli kabi?
Ngicabange ukuthi kubalulekile ngokwanele ukunikela ingxenye ebalulekile yencwadi yami ebufakazini! Ukufunda izindaba zabanye ababesenkingeni futhi belulama kwakubalulekile empumelelweni yami — njengoba ushilo, kwangazisa ukuthi ngangikude ngedwa, ukuthi yini okufanele ngiyilindele, nokuthi ngingaqala kanjani ukululama. In Wack, Ngihlanganise imibono ebanzi enhlobonhlobo ngangokunokwenzeka ngokufaka izitatimende ezivela kwabancane nabadala, abesilisa nabesifazane, imilutha yezocansi kanye nabalingani bezidakamizwa ezingcolile, abasebenzisi abangajwayelekile namacala anzima, njll. Akunandaba nomlando oyingqayizivele wabafundi bami futhi ubudlelwane nezocansi, ngangifuna ukuhlinzeka ngezindaba ezizohlangana nazo.
Yisiphi isimangalo esimangazayo / esisabisayo kakhulu osithole lapho ucwaninga ngale ncwadi?
Umbuzo omkhulu! Ngamangala nakanjani ukubona ukuthi ukusetshenziswa kwe-porn ye-Intanethi okungaguquki ngokomzimba kungaguqula kanjani isakhiwo nomsebenzi wobuchopho bethu. Akukhona nje kuphela ukuthi imilutha ye-porn ikhombisa ukusabela okunamandla kobuchopho kokukhuthazeka kwe-porn kunokungezona izidakamizwa, kodwa futhi kuvela ukuthi lo mugqwaqo ungenza buthaka izingxenye zobuchopho ezenzelwe ukubusa ukuzithiba, ukuthatha izinqumo okunengqondo, ukugqugquzela nokunye. Bona lolu cwaningo olushicilelwe muva nje eJalimane: UKühn noGallinat (2014)
Kubaluleke kangakanani ukuba nengxoxo evulekile ngokusetshenziswa kwe-porn ekusizeni ukubhekana nenkinga, futhi nokwakha umbiko oqondile wokuzinikeza ngezinhloso zocwaningo?
Ukufunda ukuthi ngivulela kanjani abantu empilweni yami kwakubalulekile ekuqondeni nasekunqobeni ukuthembela kwami ezithombeni ezingcolile. Ngokukhuluma ngobuthakathaka bami, ngazamukela ngendlela engangiyiyo futhi ngingenamahloni. Kulapho kuphela lapho enganginamandla okuqhubekela phambili ngithuthuke ngaba yindoda engcono. Lokhu kwakungelula, kepha kwakukufanele impela.
Izimfihlo zifana nezisindo ezisindayo uma uzithwala isikhathi eside. Uma noma ubani laphaya elwa nanoma yikuphi ukulutha ocabanga ukuthi kuyinkinga kuwe, tshela othile. Qala ngokungaziwa emphakathini wokusekelwa okuku-inthanethi noma ngomelaphi uma kufanele, kepha ungami lapho. Lapho abantu abaningi uxoxa ngezinkinga zakho, umthwalo wakho ubonakala ulula, futhi uba namandla futhi ube namandla. Futhi endleleni, ungavele uthole ukuthi ugqugquzele futhi wasiza abanye abalwa nezimfihlo zabo.
Ngabe ucabanga ukuthi ukusetshenziswa kwe-porn kungahle kube nempilo?
Kwabanye abantu, ukusetshenziswa okulula kwe-porn kungahle kungalimazi impilo yabo, kepha izithombe zocansi azinikezi lutho oluthuthukisa impilo noma injabulo. Ama-libidos ethu akhona ukusishukumisela ukuba sixhumane nabanye abantu, futhi ubudlelwane bezocansi obunempilo buhlinzeka ngokwaneliseka emazingeni amaningi ahlala isikhathi eside ngemuva kovuthondaba. I-Porn, ngakolunye uhlangothi, ikhohlisa izinhlelo zethu zokuphendula ngokocansi ekuphishekeleni okuthile okungekho ngempela. Ngemuva kwe-orgasm lapho imizwa yobumnandi bomzimba iphela, imvamisa sishiywa singenalutho futhi sisodwa, ngoba labo akubona abesifazane empeleni kwikhompyutha yakho. Lezo zithombe zimane zilula futhi ziyisithunzi, futhi abantu abaningi ngokwengeziwe bakhetha ngokufanele ukungazilimazi ekuphishekeleni ama-phantom.
Njengomlutha otholekile, ingabe uthola injabulo oyithola manje kwezocansi ilingana naleso obekujwayelekile ukuthola ku-porn? Ngabe kungcono, kuhlukile, futhi kanjani?
Kunokwehluka okuningi kangangokuba kunzima ukukubeka konke ngamagama. Ngenkathi ngisebenzisa i-porn, ngangihlale ngilambele okuningi-amasayithi amaningi, ukuhlukahluka okuningi, okuqukethwe okwedlulele kakhulu - kepha noma ngabe ngijule kangakanani, akukaze kungijabulise. Ngangilahliwe kakhulu kulokhu kuphishekela injabulo ukuthi ucansi lwangempela lwalunzima, lungajabulisi futhi ludumaza.
Ngemuva kwengxenye engaphezu kwengxenye yonyaka ngaphandle kocansi, ukubheka nje noma ukumamatheka okuvela kowesifazane okhangayo kuthumela amandla kimi, futhi ucansi lwangempela luyisipiliyoni esihle, esingenakuqhathaniswa. Ngaphambi, ngangizizwa ngijabule kuphela futhi ngifinyelela i-orgasm lapho ngisebenzisa isandla sami, kepha manje ukuzwela kwami ngokomzimba kukhuphukile, futhi ukwaneliseka okungokomzwelo kokuxhuma kowesifazane wangempela ngocansi olukhulu kuswele ngokuphelele ukusetshenziswa kocansi. Ngobusuku obubodwa nowesifazane engifisayo ukuthi ubaluleke ngaphezu kwezikhathi eziyinkulungwane wedwa nekhompyutha yami nebhokisi lezicubu.
Yini ongathanda ukuyibona ngokulandelayo emkhakheni wokulutha ngezocansi?
Angikusekeli ukwenqabela ukukhiqizwa noma ukusatshalaliswa kocansi, kepha kunezinguquko ezintathu ezibaluleke kakhulu okumele sizenze. Okokuqala, abantu badinga ukwazi ukuthi ukusetshenziswa kocansi kwe-Intanethi kungaba ngaphezu kokuzilibazisa okungenabungozi — kungaba umlutha odala ukungasebenzi kahle kwezocansi nangokomzwelo. Ngibhalile I-Wack: Inomlutha we-Porn Internet ukuze abantu bangahambi iminyaka bengazi ukuthi yini engalungile kubo noma ukuthi bangayilungisa kanjani (njengoba ngenzile).
Okwesibili, sidinga ukwenza kube nzima kakhulu ngabantwana ukuthola noma ukukhubeka ezithombeni zobulili ezingcolile ze-Intanethi. Ngisekela uhlelo lapho abahlinzeki bezinsizakalo bezodingeka ukuthi bavimbe ukufinyelela kumasayithi we-porn ngaphandle kokuthi umnikazi we-akhawunti abize futhi acele ukuthi ibhulokhi iphakanyiswe. Labo abafuna ukungena bangakwenza lokho, kanti labo abangadingi ukuthi bakhathazeke kakhulu ngakho.
Okwesithathu, abazali kudingeka bazifundise ngenkinga yezocansi, bakhululeke ukuxoxa ngocansi, bese befundisa izingane zabo ngezingozi zanamuhla abazobhekana nazo. Iningi lale nkinga likhona kuphela ngoba asikhululekile ukubhekana nokuxoxa ngezihloko zocansi, ikakhulukazi phakathi kwamalungu omndeni. Uma singafundisi futhi siqondise izingane zethu, i-Intanethi izokwenza njalo.
Kwakunzima kangakanani ukusetha izindaba zakho siqu phansi?
Ekuqaleni, kwakunzima kakhulu. Kepha lapho ngifunda futhi ngibona ukuthi inkulu kangakanani le nkinga emphakathini wethu, kulapho ngangazi khona ukuthi kufanele ngibelane ngendaba yami ngoba inamandla amakhulu okusiza abanye. Abangani bami abaningi selokhu bayeka ukusebenzisa ezocansi futhi bathola ukuthuthuka okumnandi ezimpilweni nasebudlelwaneni babo, futhi nabanye abantu abaningi engingakaze ngihlangane nabo bake bangibonga ngokuhlanganyela lolu lwazi, ngakho ngiyazi ukuthi ngenze isinqumo esifanele.
Ngabe wenza mehluko muni ukuya kuma-porn wempilo yakho?
Hawu, ngizovele ngikhombe inhlamvu umehluko omkhulu, ngoba kuningi:
- Manje ngifinyelela futhi ngilondoloze ukwakheka okuqinile ngesikhathi sobulili ngaphandle kokuhlala ngicabanga izigcawu ze-porn, nemizwa engizizwa ingcono kakhulu. Okwesikhashana nje ngemuva kokuthola kabusha ama-erections ami ngangisenokubambezeleka okukhulu kwe-porn, kepha manje lokho sekunciphile, futhi ngiyakwazi ukuzilolonga ngesikhathi sobulili sangasese sowesifazane ngekhondomu.
- Imizwelo yami icebile futhi inokujula okwengeziwe. Sekuyiminyaka engaba ngu-12 ngingakhalanga nakanye, futhi ngiyabona ukuthi leyo nkathi yempilo yami yaqala ngesikhathi lapho ngiqala ukubuka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile. Manje, kufana nokuthi ngiphapheme ngokweqiniso futhi ngikwazi ukuzwa uhla oluphelele lwemizwa yomuntu, kusuka kosizi oludabukisayo kuya ekumangalisweni okukhulu nokwesaba. Ngiyayithanda.
- Anginamahloni. Ngaphambi kwalolu hambo ngangifunde ukukhuluma nge-porn nabangane futhi ngazi ukuthi kwakuwumsebenzi ojwayelekile, kodwa angizange ngiziqhenye ngakho. Manje, okokuqala ngqa empilweni yami, ngithembeke ngokuphelele kubantu engibathandayo ngisho nakubantu engingabazi. Ngitshele abantu abaningi ngomlando wami owedlule ngomlutha wezocansi nokuthi wangilimaza kanjani. Abanye bangihlulela ngokhahlo ngenxa yalokho, kepha lokho kungenza angiqonde ngqo. Ngiphephe ngokuphelele kimi.
- Ukwazisa kwami (kokubili ngokocansi nangokomzwelo) kwabesifazane bangempela engihlangana nabo kuye kwavela.
- Ngathandana, okuyinto engakaze yenzeke kimi lapho ngisebenzisa i-porn. Ngahlangana naye ezinyangeni eziyisikhombisa ezedlule. Futhi ngangithembeke ngokuphelele kuye ngokuthi ngangikuphi empilweni yami, engicabanga ukuthi yingxenye enkulu yokuthi kungani wayengithanda. Ubudlelwano sebuphelile manje, kepha bekuyisipiliyoni esihle kithi sobabili. • Nginamandla amaningi engqondo nawomzimba futhi isikhathi esiningi impela.
- Isisusa sami namandla amakhulu yizigi ezandulela lapho zazikhona. Ngiye kwesinye isikhathi ngizinikela ekuhlehliseni, kodwa ezinyangeni eziyisikhombisa ezedlule ngibhale incwadi yamagama e-60,000, ngaqala ibhizinisi, ngaxoxisana ngephromoshini emsebenzini, ngalandela futhi ngathandana nowesifazane omuhle, ngamukela umsebenzi ongaguquki kanye nohlobo lokuzindla, futhi wenza ushintsho olukhulu lokudla olungenze ngazizwa nginempilo futhi nginamandla kunangaphambili. Sengiyabona manje ukuthi i-porn-kanye nokusetshenziswa kabi kwemidlalo yama-video nama-TV / ama-movie - kwakuyinto yokuthula eyayisebenza kuphela ukungivimba ekufezekiseni amaphupho ami.
I-Wack BE Wack's Wack: Umlutha we-Internet Porn iyatholakala manje kuwo womabili ama-Amazon (US / UK) futhi Smashwords. Uhlanganisa namavidiyo asesihlokweni esifanayo ochungechungeni olubizwa ngeSpanglerTV, olutholakala lapha: Ukuvunyelwa kwe-Bvrning ku-You Tube
Links Ngilusizo I-Wack: Inomlutha we-Porn Internet e-Amazon (UK) I-Wack: Inomlutha we-Porn Internet e-Amazon (US)
Nawe Ungajabulela…
 | Ukubuyekezwa: I-Wack Yalutheka I-Intanethi ye-Intanethi kaNowa BE ISonto
I-Wack: Inomlutha we-Porn Internet (2014) umhlahlandlela wocwaningo lwamanje ngokulutha kocansi, kanye nencwajana yalabo abafuna ukunciphisa umkhuba wabo. INoah BE Church idlulela ngalé kocwaningo lwesayensi, bese iletha eyayo indaba - ngokuthembeka okubuhlungu… [Funda kabanzi] |
- Bona okuningi ku: http://www.bibliofreak.net/2014/08/interview-noah-be-church.html#sthash.WB4UkdRd.dpuf
Ingxoxo yoqobo
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