Ngcaphuno
I-Porn Porn
Ukunyuka kwe-intanethi ye-intanethi kuye kwabangela ukuphila okuningi kobulili. Abantu bangathola, ku-alamu yabo, ukuthi i-libido yomlingani wabo ilahlekile ngokuyisimangaliso. Akunjalo, sinikezwe nje kukhompyutha. Ukubambisana okungavumelani phakathi kwemikhiqizo ye-IT ngakolunye uhlangothi nezinkulungwane zabanikezeli bokuqukethwe bezocansi kunomunye usebenzise kabi iphutha lokuklama kwengqondo yomuntu. Ingqondo ekuqaleni eyakhelwe ukubhekana nokulingana okuncane ngokocansi kunalokho okwenzeka ngeso lengqondo yowesifazane wesizwe kulo lonke i-savanna inikezwa usizo lapho ihlaselwa izimemo eziqhubekayo zokuhlanganyela ezimweni ezibucayi ezidlula kakhulu noma yikuphi okuphushulwa yingqondo enesifo seMarquis de Sade. Akukho lutho olwanele ngokwanele ekusebenzeni kwethu kwengqondo ukukhokhela ukuthuthukiswa kwamakhono ethu kwezobuchwepheshe, akukho lutho oluzosibopha isifiso sethu esinesifiso sokwenqaba zonke ezinye izinto ezibalulekile ngenxa yamaminithi ambalwa (okungenzeka kube amahora amane) amaholide omnyama wewebhu. I-Porn ishesha kakhulu futhi ikhululekile, isonakalisa ikhono lethu lokuhlanganyela ebantwini abaningi kakhulu futhi abancinci bezocansi zangempela. Isixazululo esihle kunazo zonke kungase kube ukukhiya ikhompyutha, nokuxoxa ngezilingo ngobuqotho. I-Porn akumele ikhulunywe ngokuthi 'ukuvukela' nje, kuhle kwabanye, kodwa ngendlela echitha izinto ezingaphezu nje kokuhle; okubalulekile ekuphileni.
Akunabulili ngicela, singamaNgisi
U-Alain de Botton ocwaningweni lwethu locansi
Ucwaningo lokuqala ngocansi lwabaqashi wembule ukuthi i-65% ofuna ubulili obuningi. Isazi sefilosofi u-Alain de Botton uchaza ukuthi uthola kanjani indlela ...
Kuyinto engavamile ukubhekana nalokhu kuphila ngaphandle kokuzizwa ngandlela-thile ngokungaqondakali ngocansi - ngokuvamile nge-degree yokucindezeleka kwangasese, mhlawumbe ekupheleni kobudlelwane, noma njengoba silala embhedeni okhungathekile eduze komngane wethu, engakwazi ukuya ukulala. Yindawo lapho iningi lethu linomqondo obuhlungu, ezinhliziyweni zethu, ukuthi singavamile kakhulu. Naphezu kokuba omunye wemisebenzi eyimfihlo kakhulu, ubulili buzungezwe imibono mayelana nokuthi abantu abavamile bahloselwe kanjani ukuzizwa nokubhekana nalolu daba. Nokho, eqinisweni, bambalwa bethu abazizwa bekhululekile 'ngokobulili'. Sipheze sonke sihlaselwa yecala kanye neuroses; ngama-phobias nezifiso eziphazamisayo; ngokunganakwa nokunyanyiswa. Sizitshela ukuthi siphenduka yonke indawo, kodwa kuphela ngokuphathelene nezinhloso eziphambene zokujwayelekile.
Akekho kithi oya ocansini njengoba sicabanga ukuthi kufanele sibheke, ngombono ojabulisayo, wezemidlalo, ongeyena obuthakathaka ukuthi sizihlupha ngokwabo ukuze sikholelwe ukuthi abanye abantu banikezwe. Siyaqaphela ukuthi ubulili obuhle akuyona nje injabulo, kusenza sibe sane futhi sijabule. Ukulala nomunye umuntu kusenza sizizwe sidinga, siphile futhi sinamandla. Ilungisa ukuzethemba kwethu futhi isishiya silungele ukubingelela izwe ngaphesheya kwekamelo lokulala nokuqiniseka okukhulu nesibindi. Ubulili obuhle bungaphezu kokunethezeka nje - okungaphezu kokuziqhenya ngokweqile - kuyindlela eya enhlotsheni ethile yempilo yengqondo.
Sekuyisikhathi sokwamukela ukungathí sina kobulili namahlaya nesibindi, futhi uqale ukukhuluma ngakho ngokuthembeka nangesihawu. Ungacabanga ukuthi kunengxoxo engaphezu kokwabelana ngezocansi emhlabeni kakade, kodwa okuningi kunomusa ongafanele, uhlobo olusikhuthaza ukuba silindele ukukhululeka nokuphelela okungenangqondo. Sicabanga ukuthi sikhululwe, kodwa empeleni kunamahloni kakhulu mayelana neqiniso lobulili. Ukungaqiniseki okuncane kule ndawo akufanele kucatshangwe kushaqisayo, kungenxa yokuphila kahle. Ngabe-ke, yiziphi ezinye izinto ezitholakala endleleni yalo mqondo omuhle: ubulili obukhulu?
Umsebenzi Wokusebenza
Okokuqala, futhi ngokungenacala, ukungabi nobulili ngaphakathi kobudlelwane obusungulwe ngokuvamile kubhekane nobunzima bokuguqulwa kwamarejista phakathi kokusebenza komsebenzi wansuku zonke kanye nokwehluleka. Izimfanelo esizifunayo uma senza ucansi ziphikisana kakhulu nalabo esibaqashile ekuqhubeni iningi leminye imisebenzi yethu yansuku zonke ehhovisi. Ubudlelwane buvame ukubandakanya, uma kungenjalo ngokushesha eminyakeni embalwa, ukusebenza komkhaya kanye nokuvuswa kwezingane njalo. Lezi zinsuku zivame ukuzizwa zihambisana nokuphathwa kwebhizinisi elincane futhi zisebenze ngamakhono amaningi afanayo kanye nezinqubo, okubandakanya ukuphathwa kwesikhathi, ukuzimela, ukusebenzisa igunya nokubeka i-agenda yokulahla abanye.
“Ucansi olumnandi alumnandi nje, lusigcina siphilile futhi sijabule”
Ubulili, ngokuphazamiseka okuphambene nokucabangela ukucabanga, ukudlala kanye nokulahleka kokulawula, kufanele ngokuphazamiseka kwalo mkhuba wokulawulwa nokuzivimbela. Isongela ukusishiya singakufaneleki, noma okungenani singavunyelwe, ukuqhubeka kabusha nemisebenzi yethu yokuphatha uma isifiso sethu siphelile. Ukukhathazeka ukuthi ngokuyeka, ngeke sikwazi ukuziphindisela ndawonye: sizohlala singabonakaliswa, abantu abasengozini, abasengozini - futhi akuyona indlela iningi lomndeni wethu kanye nemithwalo yethu yokusebenza esinika amandla uku. Siyakugwema ucansi hhayi ngoba akuyona into emnandi kodwa ngoba izinjabulo zalo ziphutha amandla ethu alandelayo ukuze sikhuthazelele izidingo ezinzima kithi.
Imizila Yansuku zonke
Ukwehluleka kwethu ukubona ukuthi uhlangothi lomuntu ohlukumezayo luhlangene nalo lungasondelana kanjani nomoya ozinzile lapho siphatha khona impilo yethu yansuku zonke. Kufanele sigxeke ukungena okungaguquki kwekhabethe kanye negumbi lokuphumula lokuhluleka kwethu ukuba nobulili obukhulu, ngoba amakhaya ethu asisiqondisa ukuze sibone abanye ngokuvumelana nesimo sengqondo abavame ukubonisa kubo. Isikhathi sangokwemvelo siba nombala unomphela ngemisebenzi ayibamba - ukugcoba, ukondla ibhodlela, ukulenga amafomu, ukugcwalisa amafomu yentela - futhi kubonisa isimo sengqondo emuva kwethu, ngaleyo ndlela sigweme ngokusuka ekutheni siphumelele. Ifenisha ifakazela ukuthi asikwazi ukuguqula ngoba akenzanga. Imvelo yabantu ibheka lokho okuyizungezile; siba ngabathanda emasontweni, sithule emamyuziyamu nasendaweni engafanele yekhaya, okuthinta kakhulu ekhaya.
Ngakho-ke ukubaluleka kwamahhotela okubalulekile. Izindonga zabo, imibhede, izihlalo eziphuthumayo, amamenyu amamamelo okubhuka, amathelevishini kanye nezinsipho ezincane ezihlanganisiwe zingenza okungaphezu kokuphendula ukunambitheka kokunethezeka; bangasikhuthaza ukuba sixhumane kabusha nezingane zethu ezilahlekelwe isikhathi eside. Akukho mkhawulo kulokho okuhlanganyelwe okwabelwana ngakho kubhuku lokugeza lokungasese kungasisiza ukuba sifinyelele. Singahle senze uthando ngokujabula ngoba sesifinyelele emuva, ngemuva kwezindima esiziphoqelelwa ukuthi sizidlale ngezimo zethu zasemakhaya, isithunzi sobulili esasiqoqa kuqala. Lesi senzo sengqondo esisha sizosizwa ngokujulile ngamanzi okugcoba, i-basketball yezithelo ezithokozelayo kanye nombono ovela efasiteleni echwebeni elingavamile.
Intukuthelo efihlekile
Singase singabi nobulili obukhulu kakhulu ngoba umlingani wethu uthukuthele nathi - noma thina nabo. Ukucabanga okuvamile kwentukuthelo kubangela ubuso obomvu, ukuphakamisa izwi kanye neminyango evulekile, kodwa kuphela kaningi, kuthatha ngendlela ehlukile. Futhi uma ingasiqondi noma iyazivuma, intukuthelo ivele ibe yinkinga, ibe engenalutho "Angiyimizwa ...".
Kunezizathu ezimbili esivame ukukhohlwa ukuthi siyathukuthelela umlingani wethu, ngakho-ke siba ngabaningi, singanakwa futhi singakwazi ukulala nabo. Okokuqala, ngoba izigameko ezithile ezithukuthelayo zenzeka ngokushesha kakhulu futhi zingabonakali, kuzilungiselelo ezinjalo ezihamba ngokushesha nezikhukhumezayo (ngesikhathi sokudla kwasekuseni, ngaphambi kokuba isikole sigijime, noma ngenkathi ingxoxo ngamafoni omakhalekhukhwini esesikhathini somoya ngesikhathi sasemini) ayikwazi ukubona icala kahle ngokwanele ukufaka noma yiluphi uhlobo lokubhikisana okuhambisanayo nalo. Umcibisholo ususiwe, usilimaza, kodwa asinalo imithombo noma umongo ukuze sibone ukuthi kanjani futhi kuphi, ngokusobala ukuthi ihlasele izikhali zethu. Futhi okwesibili, kaningi asivezi intukuthelo yethu ngisho nalapho siyiqonda, ngoba izinto ezisikhubekisa zingabonakala zingenangqondo kakhulu, ziphelile noma zingavamile ukuthi zingase zizwakale zingenangqondo uma zikhulunywa ngokuzwakalayo. Ngisho nokuziphindisela kithi kungenza sibe namahloni.
"Ukwanda kwe-porn ye-intanethi kulimaze impilo eningi yezocansi"
Ngokwesibonelo, singalimaza kakhulu lapho umlingani wethu ehluleka ukubuka izinwele zethu ezintsha noma angasebenzisi i-breadboard ngenkathi esika i-baguette encane, ehlakaza yonke imfucumfucu. Lokhu kubonakala sengathi akufanelekile ukufaka izikhalazo ezisemthethweni. Ukumemezela, "Ngiyathukuthela ngoba usika i-baguette ngendlela engafanele", ukubeka engozini ukuzwakala ngesikhathi esisodwa bese uhlambalaza. Kodwa singadinga ukuphenya izikhalo zethu ukuze singene esimweni esisengozini, esithembayo, esithembekile esenza ubulili kungenzeka.
I-Porn Porn
Ukunyuka kwe-intanethi ye-intanethi kuye kwabangela ukuphila okuningi kobulili. Abantu bangathola, ku-alamu yabo, ukuthi i-libido yomlingani wabo ilahlekile ngokuyisimangaliso. Akunjalo, sinikezwe nje kukhompyutha. Ukubambisana okungavumelani phakathi kwemikhiqizo ye-IT ngakolunye uhlangothi nezinkulungwane zabanikezeli bokuqukethwe bezocansi kunomunye usebenzise kabi iphutha lokuklama kwengqondo yomuntu. Ingqondo ekuqaleni eyakhelwe ukubhekana nokulingana okuncane ngokocansi kunalokho okwenzeka ngeso lengqondo yowesifazane wesizwe kulo lonke i-savanna inikezwa usizo lapho ihlaselwa izimemo eziqhubekayo zokuhlanganyela ezimweni ezibucayi ezidlula kakhulu noma yikuphi okuphushulwa yingqondo enesifo seMarquis de Sade. Akukho lutho olwanele ngokwanele ekusebenzeni kwethu kwengqondo ukukhokhela ukuthuthukiswa kwamakhono ethu kwezobuchwepheshe, akukho lutho oluzosibopha isifiso sethu esinesifiso sokwenqaba zonke ezinye izinto ezibalulekile ngenxa yamaminithi ambalwa (okungenzeka kube amahora amane) amaholide omnyama wewebhu. I-Porn ishesha kakhulu futhi ikhululekile, isonakalisa ikhono lethu lokuhlanganyela ebantwini abaningi kakhulu futhi abancinci bezocansi zangempela. Isixazululo esihle kunazo zonke kungase kube ukukhiya ikhompyutha, nokuxoxa ngezilingo ngobuqotho. I-Porn akumele ikhulunywe ngokuthi 'ukuvukela' nje, kuhle kwabanye, kodwa ngendlela echitha izinto ezingaphezu nje kokuhle; okubalulekile ekuphileni.
Ukuba Ozakwethu
Kuyinto ephawulekayo ukuthi izingane zidalwe ngocansi kodwa futhi zibe nomkhuba omubi wokubulala ubulili. Ukuba khona kwabo kokubili kujabulisa futhi akucabangi neze uhlobo lwemizwa yokukhathazeka ukuthi (indlela emuva lapho) yenza ubulili kungenzeka. Ingxenye yenkinga ukuthi abalingani bethu banomkhuba wokuguqula izibalo zethu zabazali kunokulingana uma sinezingane. Siyeka ukubheka abalingani njengezibalo ezibonakalayo lapho sichitha ingxenye enkulu yansuku zonke ezenza izindima zikaMmy 'noma' Daddy '. Ngisho noma singewona izithameli ezihlosiwe zomunye walabo abenzayo, kumele sibe yizifakazo kubo njalo. Uma izingane sezilele, kungase kube okuvamile kumlingani oyedwa - kwelinye lalezi zinhlayiyana ezibhekisela kuSigmund Freud ezithandekayo - ukubhekisela kwelinye ngokuthi 'umama' noma 'ubaba', ukudideka okungase kuhlanganiswe ngokusebenzisa uhlobo olufanayo lwezwi elidangali eliqondisa izigwegwe elisebenza usuku lonke ukugcina intsha elayini.
"Nakuba singase sizame ukuyihlukumeza, ubulili bunomkhuba ophindaphindiwe wokulimaza empilweni yethu"
Kungaba nzima ukuthi bobabili ababambe iqhaza babambelele eqinisweni elingacacile kodwa elingavumelekile ukuthi empeleni bangabangane nabalingani bomunye nomunye, hhayi ozakwabo esikhungweni sezingane. Indlela yokuphuma kulo mkhuba akuyona neze ukuqala ngokuphindaphindiwe nomlingani ohlukile, ngoba uma singaqapheli ukhetho oluzayo bazothola ukuhlukunyezwa ezingeni lezicansi, futhi, uma ubuhlobo buqalile. Akuyona umuntu omusha esiyidingayo, kodwa indlela entsha yokubona owaziwayo. Inkinga yindaba yokuthi sibheka kanjani umlingani wethu. Ukugcina ubulili bethu buhlala phansi, sidinga ukucabanga. Kufanele sizame ukuthola okuhle nokuhle ngaphansi kwezigaba zomkhuba kanye nesimiso. Kungenzeka sivame ukubona umlingani wethu ephikisana ne-buggy, ephikisana nentombazane encane, ehlukumeza inkampani kagesi futhi ebuyela ekhaya ehlukunyezwa endaweni yokusebenzela esiyikhohliwe ukuthi ubukhulu kuye noma obumpofu, othukuthele, ohlazekile, ohlakaniphile futhi, ngaphezu kwakho konke okunye, ephila.
Complicated
Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ukukhathazeka esikuzwayo mayelana nokuya ocansini kuvame ukukhushulwa ngombono wokuthi siyingxenye yobudala obukhululekile - futhi kufanele kube manje, ngenxa yalokho, ukuthola ubulili indaba eqondile neyinkimbinkimbi. Naphezu kwemizamo yethu emihle yokuyihlanza ngokukhethekile kwayo, ubulili angeke kube lula ngezindlela esingathanda ukuzenza. Ingafa; lenqaba ukuhlala kahle ngothando, njengoba kufanele. Tame noma singase sizame, ubulili bunomkhuba ophindaphindiwe wokulimaza impilo yethu yonke. Ubulili buhlala kungenangqondo, futhi mhlawumbe bungahambisani, ukuphikisana nezinye izibopho zethu nezindinganiso eziphakeme kakhulu.
Mhlawumbe ekugcineni kufanele samukele ukuthi ubulili buyinto engavamile, esikhundleni sokuzibeka icala ngenxa yokungaphenduli ngezindlela ezijwayelekile zokufuna ukudideka. Lokhu akusho ukuthi asikwazi ukuthatha izinyathelo zokukhulisa ukuhlakanipha mayelana nobulili. Kufanele sivele siqaphele ukuthi asisoze sakwazi ukunqoba ngokuphelele ubunzima obubekayo.
Indlela Ongacabanga Ngayo Ngezocansi I-Alain de Botton (i-Pan, i-£ 7.99) iphuma nge-10 May njengengxenye yochungechunge lokuhlola umsebenzi, ubulili, imali, ukuvuthwa ngokomzwelo, impilo yedijithali nokushintsha umhlaba. Ukugubha, iSikole Sokuphila sivakashela eLondon, e-Edinburgh, eDublin naseManchester. Ukuze uthole ulwazi vakashela theschooloflife.com
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