Izinsuku ze-100! (Isikhathi esingu-2x nxazonke!) - ngikufundeni?
Izimiso ze-10 zokubuyiswa
Ngezansi kunezimiso eziningana eziye zahlala kimi njengamanje nangesikhathi sami eside kakhulu sokuziqeda. Kulezo zikhathi lapho silahleka ehlathini, futhi kudingeka sithole indlela yethu, sebenzisa lezi zimiso (noma lezo ezikusebenzele zona) ukuze uthole futhi indlela yakho yokuphuma.
Lezi zimiso ezingezansi zenzelwe ukuhlangenwe nakho kwami kusukela ekujoyina iReboot Nation emuva ngoNovemba ka-2014, futhi ziphume kwi-crucible yokuzisebenzisa ngesikhathi sangempela. Lezi zisebenza ngokuzikhandla zingashintsha noma yikuphi ukuziphatha okubi ukubuyela emuva. Ithemba lami ukuthi bangaba usizo emizamweni yakho yokutakula.
1. Ungacabangi ngakho.
Yilokho okuye kwahanjiswa njenge- I-Porn akuyona inketho ukucabanga. Ngingayibiza ngokuthi 'i-Porn ayikho,' njengoba u-Underdog axoxa ngalesi sihloko.
Sijwayele ukucabanga ngakho- ngaso sonke isikhathi! Inqobo nje uma sikukhipha engqondweni yethu, siphinda sikwenze okungokoqobo (ngakho-ke kungenzeka) ekwazini kwethu.
Imicabango ivame ukwenza izenzo, futhi.
Manje asikwazi ukuvimbela yonke imicabango evela, kepha le ingachithwa kalula futhi ngokushesha njengoba yafika. Kungaleso sikhathi lapho sivumela imicabango ihlale isikhathi eside lapho kuba nzima ukuyisusa. “Awukwazi ukuvimba zonke izinyoni ezindiza phezulu, kodwa ungakuvimba ekwakheni isidleke ezinweleni zakho” - njengoba kusho isisho.
Zama ukucabanga ngakho, hhayi ngokuzama ukungazi, kodwa ngokucabanga ngezinto ezingcono nezikhiqizayo.
2. Ungaziphoxi.
Kimi, okuhlaze amahloni anobuthi ekhanda lakhe umusa kaNkulunkulu ongonakalisiwe, ongonakalisiwe, ngaphandle kokuhlanganiswa komthetho noma umthetho. Ekwamukeleni ukuthi ZONKE izono zami zithethelelwe, kufaka phakathi zonke izono zesikhathi esizayo, esikhundleni sokunginika ilayisense yokuziphatha okubi, kube nomphumela ophambene.
Okufakiwe kulokhu akuhambisi isimilo sakho. Esikhundleni sokuziphonsa njengezinkinga ezilungile noma ezingalungile (noma zingaba njalo), zicabange ngezindlela zokuzwela ngokwengeziwe. Ziqonde, ubunzima bakho nobuthakathaka bakho. Ungazikhalimeli, noma ngemuva kokuwa. Esikhundleni sokuba yisitha sakho esibi kakhulu, kufanele ube nozwela kakhulu kuwe.
Kuthiwani uma othile engakholwa? Ngicabanga ukuthi kusebenza okufanayo. Singahlale sibe nesihawu kithi, futhi sixolele ngokwethu-kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yini. Ihlazo elidakayo livutha kuphela umlutha!
I-3. Yakha wena omusha ngokuphelele, hhayi omdala ongayithinti I-PMO.
Imfihlo yenguquko ukugxila wonke amandla akho, hhayi ekulwa nomdala, kodwa ekwakheni okusha.
~ Character 'Socrates', Way of the Peaceful Warrior: Incwadi Eguqula Izimpilo nguDan Millman
Lokhu kuhlangana nalokhu okungenhla, kungacabangi ngakho. Esikhundleni salokho, simatasa kakhulu- hhayi nje ukwakha kabusha izimpilo zethu, kepha sakha impilo entsha ngokuphelele, ekhululekile kuyo I-PMO. Lokhu akumayelana nokuthi, “Ngidinga ukuyeka lokhu nalokhuya, ngenze okunye…”, kunalokho kumane kugxilwe ekwenzeni okunye.
Manje yithuba lakho! Zonke izinto obufuna ukuzenza, kepha i-porn nokushaya indlwabu kungene endleleni yakho, kukuphange ubungqingili besilisa, ubuqambi besilisa, manje ungathola lawo mandla ukubuyela emuva uphinde wenze kabusha impilo obukade uyifuna. Umbono wale mpilo kufanele udle umzuzu nomzuzu wakho wokuvuka, futhi nalapho ulala. 'Imvelo izonda i-vacuum', yingakho-ke saba nomlutha ekuqaleni, ukungabi nalutho kwangaphakathi. Manje yisikhathi sokuyigcwalisa ngemibono nezenzo ezibheke kuwe omusha ngokuphelele.
I-4. Sebenza ngezinto ezibangela / ezikhuthaza ngezimo zesikhathi sangempela ukuze uphinde uzithibe.
Nakhu lapho ngisebenze khona mathupha ne-ERP (ukuvimbela-ukuphendula-ukuvimbela), noma ukwelashwa kokuchayeka. Noma, akudingeki kube umkhuba olawulwayo, kepha umuntu angasebenza nezimbangela (ukucindezeleka kwangaphandle nokukhathazeka kwangaphakathi), kanye nokunxusa / izilingo ngesikhathi sangempela, ezimeni zangempela zempilo. Ngemuva kwakho konke, sifuna ukulingisa izimo zempilo yangempela ngokuseduze ngangokunokwenzeka, ukuze sikudlulisele empilweni yansuku zonke.
Lokhu kujwayela ukuthi ungazisingatha kanjani izikhalazo. Aziziningi izitimela zezikhathi lapho lezi zinto zibala ngempela, ekushiseni kwesikhashana. Wenzani lapho inhliziyo yakho igijima, futhi ukushaya kwakho kwenyuka, nokuphefumula kwakho kungaphansi? Ngabe sazi ngisho nezimpendulo zethu zomzimba lapho sifikelwa yizikhalazo? Ngabe siyazi ukuthi sikhathazeka nini?
Uyazi ukuthi lezi yizikhathi lapho ungakhanya khona? Funda ukuthi nguwe olawulayo, hhayi umlutha wakho. Landela isifinyezo se-AWARE ukuze ubhekane nalezi zikhathi, noma ngabe kuyizifiso zomzimba, noma noma ngabe imicabango nemicabango ivela engqondweni yakho:
AWARE
I-AT - Ukwamukelwa. Yamukela, ngisho nokwamukela imizwa yokukhathazeka, isikhuthazo noma ukucabanga;
W- Ukubuka. Buka njengombukeli ongaphandle ngaphandle kokwahlulela, ngobubele nokuqonda.
A- Umthetho. Thatha izinyathelo ngalezi zemizwa, ngokuphefumula okujulile, uhlale uphelile okwamanje.
R- Phinda. Phinda izinyathelo ze-1-3, kuze kube yilapho umuzwa udlula.
E- Lindela. Yazi ukuthi lezi zizwa zokukhathazeka, izimbangela, noma izikhalo zizofika, kodwa ube nethemba lokuthi uzoziphatha ngempumelelo.
I-5. Landela umbuso wesibili-mbili ukuze udambise ukukhanuka / voyeurism.
Ngangihlale ngizibuza ukuthi yini umugqa ongafinyeleleki futhi ofiphele phakathi kokwazisa owesifazane ngobuhle bakhe nokukhanuka kwangempela, okuholela ekushayeni indlwabu kanye / noma ezithombeni ezingcolile. Ngangazi ukuthi kunendawo lapho ngingabazisa khona ubuhle babo, futhi ngingabi nenkanuko, noma i-voyeuristic, kepha lapho ngiqala ukucabanga ngaleyo migqa, ekugcineni ngangiwela enkanukweni ngingaqapheli- noma kwesinye isikhathi ngingakuqapheli.
Vumela inkathi yesibili kuphela lapho ungabheka khona, kepha bese uvula amehlo akho. Lokhu kuthatha umkhuba omncane, kepha kungekudala uzothola ukuthi kuza ngokuzenzakalela. Izikhathi eziningi angithathi ngisho imizuzwana emibili, ngizozibheka ngokuzenzekelayo. Uma uzizwa ukukhathazeka ngakho kukhuphuka, yisho emphakathini, bese wehlisa ijubane futhi ujulise ukuphefumula kwakho.
Umthetho wesibili wesibili uhlukile bese uthi, 'ukuwufaka emhlophe', uzama ukungafisi konke okuhambayo, wesabe ngisho nokubona umuntu wesifazane, ngaphandle kokuwela kulowo mqondo ophambene. Umthetho wesibili uthi, "Kulungile, ungabona owesifazane omuhle, futhi ububonge ubuhle bakhe - kepha imizuzwana emibili nje" - manje, leso akusona isikhathi eside, kodwa sinde ngokwanele ukubonga ubuhle bakhe, ngenkathi ngasikhathi sinye kuphazamisa okungaba yisikhuthazi semvelo ohlelweni lwethu lokuzala, lapho ubuchopho bethu buqala khona ukumbona njengomlingani ongase abe ngumlingani. Ngithole ukuthi noma esikhathini sesibili, ingqondo yami iyasikhumbula isithombe, kepha asishisanga kangako ebuchosheni bami. Esikhundleni salokho, ngiba nomuzwa ongcono wokuzithiba esidlangalaleni, futhi kudlulela empilweni yami yangasese. Ngale ndlela, ngingajabulela ubuhle ngaphandle kokukuthatha njenge-dopamine hit, noma okuthile ukuqhubekisela phambili isimilo esingenampilo ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.
I-6. Akuzona zonke ukuphelelwa yisikhathi ukuphindaphinda, ukuphelelwa yisikhathi kuphelelwa yisikhathi njengezifundo ezifundwayo hhayi njengokuhluleka.
Lokhu kukhuluma nalokho okubizwa nge- Ukuhlukumeza ukuhlukumezeka. Kukhona abambalwa kithi lapha abanokuqalisa okuphelele nokungenasici noma umzamo wokutakula. Amaphutha angase akwenzeke ngokuvamile, futhi kudingeka sibe nesiteleka sokubhekana nesikhathi lapho kwenzeka khona.
Indlela esisingatha ngayo ukuphelelwa yisikhathi kuyonquma ukuthi ngabe sifunda yini ezifundisweni ezinikezwe, noma sibuyele emuva ngokuphindaphindiwe okugcwele. Singabuya ukulawula? Noma, ingabe asikho ukulawula? Ingabe ikhona i re kuya kwethu iphela? Ingabe iyaphinda, noma ukuphindaphinda okunenjongo kokuziphatha kwangaphambili kwansuku zonke noma ngesonto noma ngeviki?
Yikhawunta yethu, ukuqala kabusha kwethu, kepha zazi ngokwanele ukuthi lapho ikhawunta yakho idinga ukusethwa kabusha. Wena wedwa ungaba yijaji elihle kakhulu lokho. Ngaso sonke isikhathi yenza okusebenzela imizamo yakho yokuthola kabusha nezinhloso, hhayi ngokusekelwe kulokho abanye abakucabangayo.
Ukushesha okubuyela emuva ekuphumeni, ngaphandle kokuwela emgodini we-porn yilokho okubaluleke kakhulu. Ungadli ekupheleleni, njengoba lokho kwenza umonakalo ongenakwenzeka emizamweni yakho.
I-7. Ukusekela abanye ngaphandle kokugxeka, ukukhumbula izikhathi zakho zobuthakathaka.
Kunesimo sengqondo esicashile esibizwa ukuziqhenya, lapho kungenzeka wenza kahle isikhathi eside kangako, bese ubona abanye bedonsa kanzima, besetha kabusha izinto zabo zokubala njalo ezinsukwini eziyishumi noma ngaphansi. “Ndoda, kumele ngabe benza kabi impela. Abakwazi ukuyihlanganisa?! ”, Noma, uma 'ubasiza', kuvela njengokukhuza kobupapa, ukuxhawula ngomunwe, kube sengathi ukushaya umfowenu emuva kokulandela okungabonakali.
Kunamamodeli amaningana okulutha laphaya, amanye asuselwa esimweni sesifo sokulutha (engingasilandeli), nezinye ezisuselwe kakhulu kwisayensi yemikhuba, kanti ezinye zivela kusizinda senkolo, lapho lezi zinto ingahle ibe nokuziphatha okuxekethile, njengoba babenjalo kimi isikhathi eside. Akusayizi olingana-konke, kunendawo yezindlela ezahlukahlukene, ngakho-ke imiphumela iyafana: ukuyeka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile nokulutha indlwabu. Futhi, akubona bonke abavuma ukuthi ukushaya indlwabu kuyinkinga (kwenzeka ukuthi ngiyibheke kanjalo).
Khumbula njalo lapho uhamba ukusiza umzalwane / udade ohluphekayo noma obuthakathaka. Yima eceleni kwabo, ubasize, hhayi ukuma phezu kwabo, ukuwashaya.
I-8. Sebenza ngamasu okucabanga ukuthuthukisa indlela entsha yokubhekana nokubhekana nokuphefumula nokuzindla.
Leli phuzu kungenzeka libe yinombolo 1, kungaba izinombolo 1-10, ngoba kukho konke esikwenzayo, kufanele sikhumbule.
Ukucabanga… Ukunaka ngendlela ethile: ngenjongo, kumzuzwana wamanje, futhi okungenjalo ukwahlulela - UJon Kabat-Zinn
Ukucabanga (sati, ngolimi lwe-Pali) kuchazwa ngokuthi uyazi, ukhona, futhi ukhumbule ngesikhathi esisemqoka noma izimfundiso eziyinhloko njengoba kuzosiza ukuhumusha kahle okuhlangenwe nakho okukhona, imizwa noma imicabango.
Ukucabanga 'ukucabanga okulungile' njengoba kuxoxwe kuNoble Eight Fold Path, futhi umkhuba uvimbela umuntu ekubeni 'aphinde azalwe kabusha', okungukuthi, ekuvuseleleni izinqubo zokucabanga noma izikimu okuholela ekugqilazweni nasekuhluphekeni.
Ukukhathazeka ngokomzwelo kungase kuqhume ukusizungezile, izimo zingase zihambe ku-haywire futhi zihlale zingenakulawulwa, futhi isidingo sokubalekela konke lokhu, ukugwema, ukuzibamba ubuhlungu nokucindezeleka kwalokhu, kuncike futhi kufushane okujikelezwa ngokuphefumula, ukucabangela, ukukhumbula, ukukhumbula izimiso lapho ukuhumusha okulungile kuveza khona futhi kucacise isimo samanje.
Sifunda ukucabanga ngendlela ebonakalayo ngokuzindla, ngokumane sibe sesikhathini ngaphandle kokubheka imicabango. Uma imicabango / imizwa iphakama, asilwi nayo, simane nje futhi ngaphandle kokwahlulela siyidedele iqhubeke, sigxile kakhulu kumzuzu wamanje. Lo mkhuba uchitheka ungene kumzuzu wethu ngamava omzuzwana.
Vumela ukucabanga kube yindlela yakho entsha yokubhekana nayo.
I-9. Qaphela ukuwela emcabangweni omdala kanye namaphethini omkhuba, ikakhulukazi emva kokuphelelwa yisikhathi kusuka ku-streak ende.
Ngaphandle kwemizamo yethu emihle futhi ehlonipheke kakhulu, noma sesidlulile isikhathi, kudingeka sazi ngezinqubo zokucabanga ezigxilile, noma izimpendulo esizifundile mayelana nezimo ezahlukahlukene. Mhlawumbe manje sesingakwazi ukuphatha owesifazane ogqoke kahle ebhodini lebhodi, kodwa umphathi wethu osolayo angase 'aqalise' ezinye izinqubo zokucabanga eziphindaphindwe kahle nezimpendulo zomzimba ezisibeka esimweni sobungozi obukhulu. Sebenza nalokhu njengamanye amaphuzu anikezwe ngenhla, kepha qaphela.
Uma kwenzeka uphelelwe yisikhathi ngemuva kwesikhathi eside sokudakwa, kubonakala kunzima kakhulu ukukhuphuka kulowo mgodi futhi uvuselele izinga lokunqoba ebesilijwayele usuku olulodwa noma ezimbili ezedlule. Mhlawumbe besicabanga ukuthi siyikhothisile, bese sithi 'sihlangane' size sifike onqenqemeni lomgodi wezithombe zocansi ngokusebenzisa abangena esikhundleni sezithombe ezingcolile, noma ngabe kwenzekani kuwe, size siwele phansi. Noma, mhlawumbe bekuwukuphela kwesikhashana esahlulelweni . Kunoma ikuphi, qaphela lokhu, ngoba kunzima kangakanani ukubuyela 'kokujwayelekile' kwakho kusongelwa, futhi siyisitha sethu esibi ngokwedlulele. Konke kule ndlela yokuthi sikhetha ukutolika kanjani okwenzekile, noma ngabe simane sibuyela emuva, noma siqhubeke ekuvuseleleni kabusha noma ekuvuseleleni kabusha izindlela ezindala ze-neural.
Buyela emuva ngokushesha okukhulu, bese ubala konke ukunqoba onakho, lezo azilahlekile. Yonke inqubekela phambili ayilahlekile. Buyela ngokushesha kulokho okusebenze ngaphambilini, futhi ungazishayi isifuba ngakho. Ungcono kunalokhu!
I-10. Qaphela amandla emicabango emibi nemizwelo ethinta ukuziphatha.
Hlola ukufaneleka kwe I-CBT (Ukwelashwa Kokuziphendulela Ngokwengqondo), futhi uqaphele ukuthi imicabango yethu-imizwa-yokuziphathamandla ixhunyanisiwe, ngokusekelwe ezinkolelweni zenkolelo zomhlaba esinazo kithi, kwabanye nakusasa.
Qala ukuzifunda ngokwakho, Zazi Wena, njengoba i-maximal ebhalwe ngaphezulu kwethempeli ku-Apollo eDelphi ithi. Buka imibono yakho, ingabe ilandela umkhuba othile wokungabi nandaba? Ingabe ucabangisisa kakhulu imicabango yakho? Kuthiwani ngemizwa yakho, ingabe unesimo esibi? Ingabe ucindezelekile, noma ukhathazekile (wesaba), noma uyajabula? Uma imizwa yakho ingalungile, thola ukuthi kungani.
Ungathathi kalula noma yiziphi izinqubo zakho zokucabanga noma izimo ezingokomzwelo, ngoba lokhu kahle kungakubeka endaweni enobungozi obukhulu bokuduka. Kufanele uqiniseke ukuthi yini le edale le micabango / imizwa emibi, bese ubuyela esimweni senjabulo nethemba ngokushesha okukhulu. Bukela ukuhleba, ucabange futhi ucabange ngezinkinga zakho- izimbangela nemiphumela yazo, kepha ngaphandle kwezixazululo. Lokhu kusiholela ezimweni ezingezinhle zemizwa futhi.
Umphefumulo wethu (isici sokusebenza kwengqondo) wenziwe ngokuzithandela (intando), ubuhlakani (imicabango) nokuzwela (imizwa). Ngentando yethu, singalawula imicabango yethu ngqo, kepha isimo sethu semizwa singaqondile ngqo. Ngakho-ke, uma sizizwa sithukuthele, noma sidabukile, asikwazi nje ukushaya iminwe yethu, bese siphumile. Kepha, uma singashintsha imicabango yethu ngokuguqula ukunaka kwentando yethu (iye ezintweni ezithe xaxa, ezinethemba nezenjabulo), khona-ke imizwa yethu izolandela ekugcineni.
Ngithemba ukuthi lokhu kwakuyisibusiso, futhi kuyasiza kuwe ngomqondo osebenzayo.
LINK - Izimiso eziyishumi Zokubuyiswa
NGU - I-Leon (sola gratia)
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