Nginguye 100 izinsuku emzamweni wami wokuthola kabusha / wokuqalisa kabusha, ngaphandle kwe-P, PMO, MO, nangama-p-subs amancane noma ukuhlela. Ngiphinde ngashaya imigqa emide ngaphambili.
Yiziphi izeluleko engingazinikeza abanye ukubasiza baphumelele kakhulu ohambweni lwabo?
Ngayinye yalezi zimiso ingisizile emizamweni yami yokululama ngempumelelo. Futhi lokhu kufanele kucatshangwe ngomongo olandelayo:
Umlutha: i-trigger / cue> ncenga + impendulo ephindaphindwayo = umkhuba / umlutha onamandla.
Inkululeko: trigger / cue> ncenga + ukuphindaphinda okungaphenduli, noma impendulo ehlukile = ushintsho lomkhuba.
Izimiso ze-16 zokubuyiswa
1. Ungabi ekululameni okungapheli, noma ube yi-serial-relapser.
Sifuna ukukugwema ukululama njengokuvela kumamodeli wezifo zokulutha (amamodeli ezinhlobo eziyizinyathelo eziyi-12). Zibone usululeme, noma usalulama. Yiba nomgomo wokuphela engqondweni, ukuthi impilo izoba njani ngaphandle kwalo mkhuba.
Futhi, uma ungakwazi ukufinyelela umugqa omude, hlola ukuthi uhlelo lwakho luyasebenza yini, noma izinga lokuzibophezela.
Qaphela: uma uhlobo lwezinyathelo eziyi-12 zamaqembu noma ukutakula kukusiza, angikushayi!
2. Uzichaza kanjani?
Ingabe 'ungumlutha'? Ungumsebenzisi we-porn? Singaba nomlutha, kungaba asiwona lowo mkhuba. Lokhu akufani ne-AA, lapho owake waba umlutha wotshwala uhlala ephuza ngokweqile, noma ungazange uthinte ukwehla kweminyaka!
Qala ukusho, ngingowesilisa (noma owesifazane) ongasebenzisi izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, ukushaya indlwabu, noma inkanuko.
3. Imfihlo yokubuyela emuva ngokushesha ngemuva kokuphelelwa yisikhathi:
Ukubona imbangela yokuphela njengoba konke kusuka ngaphakathi kuwe. Ungayisoli ngezimo zangaphandle, izimbangela, noma ingcindezi. Ngokushesha lapho ubona lokhu, ngokushesha uzobuyela emuva, futhi izikhathi ezimbalwa ozophela ngazo.
4. Gwema ubunzima obumhlophe obunzima ngokungacabangi ngakho.
Ukunakwa kuvame ukuveza inhloso. Noma ucabanga “ngokululama kwakho” ngaso sonke isikhathi, usacabanga ngakho. Uma ususethe izinhloso zakho (nsuku zonke), ungakukhokhi lokho.
5. Sebenzisa ukucabanga ngokuziqeqesha ukuze uchithe izifiso.
Lapho kufika izikhalazo, ziqaphele njengombukeli wangaphandle, ongekho ekwahluleleni. Qaphela ukushaya kwenhliziyo yakho, ukushaya kwenhliziyo yakho, uma ukuphefumula kujule, futhi lapho lokhu kwehla. Gxila ekuphefumuleni okujulile, kuze kudlule isifiso. Phinda okungenhla nganoma yisiphi isifiso sokubuyela.
6. Ukuncoma ubuhle akuyona inkanuko, yazi umehluko.
Uma owesifazane emuhle, vuma lokho. Kulungile. Ngemuva kwalokho, ungahlali kukho. Ungakhathazeki ngakho. Usuyalawula manje, hhayi inja efuna ukuhogela izinja zezinye izinja! Nquma ukuthi idrayivu yakho yokufisa emphakathini ukukhathazeka, noma ngesidingo esijulile esingokomzwelo.
7. Qamba kabusha 'izimbangela' njengezinkomba.
Umqondo 'wezimbangela' awunikezi amandla. Inika amandla amaningi kakhulu ezimeni ezingaphandle, izimo ezingokomzwelo, noma ukuhlukumezeka okwedlule. Izinkomba zehlukile, njengezinto ezingaphandle ezisikhumbuza umkhuba wethu. Banjengokushaya insimbi, futhi ngenxa yalokho inja kaPavlov iyaconsa. Lokhu kungokwemvelo, futhi ukunxenxa akunamandla okwenza ukuthi wenze noma yini. Uhlala ulawula, hhayi umkhuba, lapho sikubona lokhu.
8. Zazi, ingabe izifiso zakho zimane nje zingumkhuba, noma zisuka endaweni ejulile ngokomzwelo / ngokomoya?
Kwesinye isikhathi sikhonjelwe ekuphenduleni okujwayelekile, futhi singakususa kalula ngokwanele. Ngezinye izikhathi, ukukhonjwa kuvela kusidingo esingokomzwelo esijulile. Singakuhlola lokhu ngathi?
Uma sinquma ukuthi lezi zikhalazo zivela ekushayeleni okujulile, ngokomoya noma ngokomzwelo, yini esingayenza? Uma ungokomoya, ungathandaza futhi / noma uzindle, noma welule isandla futhi uxhumane nabathandekayo.
9. Lapho kungenzeka khona, sebenzisa oshade naye ukuqeda izifiso ezinamandla.
Akukho lutho olungalungile noma olubi olwenziwe uma ufikelwa izifiso ezinamandla, ekuphendukeleni kumkakho bese usebenza naye. Ungesabi 'chaser effect', njengoba ubuyela ebulilini 'bomhlaba wangempela'.
Bhekana nezikhalazo ze-'chaser-effect 'njengoba kunqunywe ngenhla, engqondweni.
10. Thola leyo ndawo emnandi phakathi kokukhombisa nokuphendula.
“Phakathi kwesikhuthazi nokuphendula kunesikhala. Kuleso sikhala amandla ethu okukhetha impendulo yethu. Impendulo yethu ilele ukukhula kwethu nenkululeko yethu. ”
- UViktor E. Frankl
11. Ziqeqeshele ukuthola umvuzo obambezelekile nokukhuthazela okukhulu.
Abanye bathatha imvula ebandayo (hhayi mina!), Abanye balinda ngaphambi kokuvula uhlelo lokusebenza abanezaziso kulo. Ukuzila ukudla ngezikhathi ezithile, nakho, kuyasiza ukuziqeqesha.
Lokhu kusiza ekwakheni ukukhuthazela lapho kubaluleka khona ngesikhathi lapho kuvela khona izikhalazo, singenza izinqumo ezingcono zokuzixosha.
12. Uyisebenzisa kanjani imigomo ekusebenzelayo.
Ukuzibekela umgomo omude kuyancomeka, futhi kuyathandeka, izinsuku ezingama-90, izinsuku eziyi-120, unyaka… Kepha umgomo ungabonakala ungenakunqotshwa, noma ungenakwenzeka kithi. Gcina inhloso ende, kepha uyihlukanise ibe ngama-mini-goal-size amancane. Isibonelo, inhloso yami 120 Izinsuku zihlukanisa zibe amasethi we-15 wezinhloso zezinsuku eziyi-8.
Kulesi vein, yazi ukuthi yini ukusetha kabusha okwenzelwe wena. Ungayekethisi kulokhu, futhi uzoba nokuqalisa kabusha / ukutakula okungahambisani okungcono.
13. Qinisa uphinde ugxile ekukhuthazeni nasekuxazululeni.
Ungakwazi ukuzibheka emehlweni? Ungazibamba ngomphimbo (ngokungakhethi ukwahlulela)? Ngabe ungazimisela ngokufa?
Yilokho okuzothatha ukwephula lo mkhuba, futhi lokhu kufanele kugcinwe njalo. Uma uzibona uhlehla (P-subs, edging), gxila futhi.
Abanye babhala uhlu lwezinzuzo ngokuyeka, nemiphumela yokwehluleka.
14. Ukunikeza nokwamukela ukwesekwa.
Ungesabi ukufinyelela kwabanye kumajenali abo futhi unikeze ukusekelwa. Noma imizamo yakho ingaphelele, awazi ukuthi ngubani ongadinga isikhuthazo.
Uma udonsa kanzima, kanti abanye banikela ukwesekwa- funda ukukwamukela endaweni enikezwe khona. Abanye banobuntu obuqinile, noma bayaphumelela, ngakho-ke baphuma kancane. Esikhundleni sokwenqaba usizo lwabo, mhlawumbe amazwi abo aqinile angakusiza ukukukhuthaza?
Kepha uma kungukuzizwa okubi, sengathi bayisicefe, ungahlala ubavimba. Indlela yakho ngeyakho, indlela yakho izohluka kwezinye, futhi sonke silapha ukulekelelana.
15. Shintsha lokho okushiwo yi-porn kuwe.
Kuyini kwezocansi, ukushaya indlwabu noma inkanuko okusidonsela emuva, ngaphandle komkhuba? Ngabe sikubona njengokuhlangabezana nesidingo esithile noma inkinga ethile ejulile? Bona i-P, PMO, ne-MO ukuthi kuyini, kumnandi! Ukuphela kwento eningayinikeza yizikhathi ezimbalwa zobumnandi, kulandelwe iminyaka yokuzisola, umshado ohlulekile, kanye ne-noodle exhugelayo.
Bheka lokhu njengokushintsha umkhuba okulula, futhi ungakuxhumanisi nezimo zakho zomzwelo, ingcindezi, noma ukuhlukumezeka okwedlule.
Akudingeki ukuthi uqale ngokuxazulula okwenzekile uneminyaka emihlanu ubudala, noma uvule i-subconscious. Ungathola inkululeko manje. Sisebenze kulo mkhuba noma umlutha ngezinqumo ezincane, manje kufanele sihambe sibuyele emuva.
Lokhu sikwenza ngokushintsha imikhuba yethu, futhi lapho leyo nto ingasasiphoqi, singasebenza kwezinye izindaba.
LINK - Izimiso ze-16 zokubuyiswa
By UPhineas 808
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