Chenjerera uropi hukanyongedza kusvika kune mufaro
Uri kuongorora kukosha kwehukama hwako nekuwanda kwaunoita bonde here? Mumwe wako ari kutanga kuita chiito chako chese cherudo sekumanikidza kuti "chiwedzere?"
Kana zvakadaro, iwe unogona kunge uchitambudzwa nehutano hwepakutanga hunovimbisa kugutsikana-asi hunoendesa zvakasiyana. Inogona kuisa mazano kunze kwechirano pabonde. (Izvi zvinonyanya kunge zvichiitika mushure mekunge imwe nguva yekuti booster kupfura honeymoon neurochemistry yakapera.)
Ngatiti iwe unoita fungidziro yepabonde kana kuyedza inopisa, nyowani nzira yekutanga. Iwe unodzokorora muchidimbu imwe yemushonga-senge buzz iyo yakaratidza kudanana kwako kwekutanga, handiti? Asi heino chakashata chidiki: kukurudzira kwakanyanya kunoita kunge kune simba rekukonzera shanduko inononoka iyo inogona kusiya mammalian brains sedu vamwe vasingagutsikani nokukurumidza pashure pacho.
Sei? Kwekanguva kuderedza kufara kunofadza yehuropi hwepakutanga mubairo wedunhu. Kune avo vakawirwa nedambudziko, * izvo zvinokwira kumusoro zvinofanirwa kuburuka-uye hazvidzokere kune yekutanga nhanho. Yakadzika muuropi, zvinoita sekunge zviyero zviri kutengesa kusvikira uropi huchidzoka.
Pachine zvakawanda zvekudzidza, asi zvinoita kunge akati wandei wemubairo wedunhu zviitiko zvichitenderedza mushure memhedzisiro zvine mukana wekutishungurudza (kutinetesa kumufaro kusvika padanho) kwechinguva. Kutanga, androgen receptors kunonoka shure kwekujaira, uye kutora kwemazuva masere kuti uite. (Izvozvo zvinoreva migumisiro ye testosterone pamusangano wemibayiro inogona kusvibiswa kwenguva yakati, zvichida inogona kuchinja maonero.) Mukuwedzera, opioids yakabudiswa panguva yekuumbwa shingaira kwekanguva, zvichiita zvichikonzera nguva inopera mu oxytocin, iyo inonyadzisa kuita zvepabonde. Sezvakataurwa pamusoro apa, pane zvakare inodonha kusateerera kusvika kune unyanzvi hweuropichemical hunokosha kumanzwiro edu ehupenyu: dopamine. Chaizvoizvo, uropi hwachinja. Iko zvino inoda kukurudzira kwakawanda kuwana mhinduro inofadza yakafanana sepakutanga, uye dzimwe nguva hapana kuwanda kwekukurudzira kunogutsa zvechokwadi kutozosvikira kwadzoka kuhuyano.
Chero chero nzira yakarurama, chero inopera mumhinduro yekufarira kweuropi ivhu rakaipa kune vanoda. Nechimwe chinhu, havasi vose vanoona kuregererwa kubva munharaunda inofadza yemakemikari eropa-nenzira yakangofanana-nekuda kwekusiyana kwemajini nehutano, kushungurudzika kwevana, kana tsika dzavo.
Vamwe vedu tisingabatsiri mune zvepabonde kusvikira ubongo hwedu hudzoka kune hukama hwavo hwepanyama uye maronda zvakare zvakare inoratidzika semafungiro akanaka. Mune vamwe vedu, zvisinei, kuregererwa kwenguva pfupi kwechinguva (kana kuti receptor) kunogona kuita kuti tifunge sekuti hatisi zvimwe zvinokosha zvekufadzwa kwedu. Isu tiri: kunyatsonzwisisika kwedu kunofadza.
Izvo zvinokonzera kutsva zvinotisimbisa kuti titsvake rubatsiro ikozvino (apo kusagadzikana kunorova). Nekuda kweiyi "mini kubviswa," isu tinogona kunzwa kunetseka uye nepfungwa kure-uye kuda kudzikamisa kusagadzikana kwedu neimwe orgasm nekukurumidza sezvazvinogona. Kana kuti pamwe isu tiri vanodikanwa kupfuura zvakajairwa, tichishuvira humwe humbowo hwerudo rwemumwe wedu — nezvatinoona. Maitiro akadai seaya ekuedza kukurudzira manzwiro ehupenyu mune ino-yakapusa mubairo wedunhu.
Nehurombo, kunze kwekunge imi mese maitika kuti musarudze zvakafanana "meds" yako kusagadzikana, pane imwe purogiramu, hupenyu hwako hwerudo hunogona kubuda mukuenderana. Kana mumwe wako akaramba zvaunoita, zvinoita sekunge mumwe wako haana hanya zvakakwana kuti asunungure kushushikana kwako. Kana zvinoita sekunge kune wawakaroorana naye sekunge iwe chaunofarira "kuwana." Zvino, iwe unogona kunge uchiona zvakaipisisa mune mumwe, uye, pamwe, kusahadzika kuzvipira kweumwe neumwe-zvese nekuda kwekufunga kwako, kwekutanga mubairo wedunhu kuri kukupa iwe zvinowirirana zvishuwo senge uropi hwako hunodzokera kuhutano. Bummer.
Mazuva ano, iwe unogona kurairwa kuti uve mudiwa ari nani kuyedza kupisa mumwe wako uyo "asiri kuzvinzwa izvozvi" ne spicier foreplay, kufungidzira panguva yebonde, kuita zviitiko zvekinkier, kuona zvinonyadzisira pamwechete, zvinodhaka zvekusimudzira pabonde, kana kutochinjanisa. vadyidzani kwemanheru. Mumwe murume akati,
Ndakanga ndichienderera mberi nokufungidzira kuti kana aigona kungonakidzwa nekuita zvepabonde zvimwe, kureva, ane humwe hupenzi, taizoita zvepabonde kakawanda uye zvandinoda zvingave zviri nani kugutsikana. Saka, ndaigara ndichiedza kumubatsira kuti aite zvakanaka. Pane kudaro akabuda kunze kwekugara kwedu.
Muchidimbu, kufunga kunogona kuitika zvishoma kugutsikana kwese. Zvinogona kutodzikisira mikana yako yekugutsikana kwenguva refu nehukama hwako hwazvino. Heino chikonzero:
Matanho e "Heat 'em up" anokohwa mhedzisiro-uye zvakavanzika mitengo.
Kunyanya kukurudzira kunounza mapepa okurumidza kukurumidza asi kunogona kupera simba muuropi, saka nzira iyi inogona kuwedzera kushushikana kwemazuva anotevera. Yeuka, uropi hunokurudzirwa ndewe nhamba ubongo. Uye humwe uropi hwakawedzerwa hunooma zvakaoma kugutsa kwenguva refu. Zvechokwadi, kusingaperi-kukurudzira gona shandura huropi hwako kuti huve mugomba dema reurourochemical iro rinokurumidza kukumbira ma jollies akawanda. Panguva imwecheteyo, wako waari kupora anogona kunzwa kuda kwakatonyanya kudekara kwerudo… chete, kana kureba pamoyo.
Kunyange zvazvo zvingaratidzika sezvakaipa zvakashata, kutaurirana nepakati yepakati hakugone kubatsira. Iwe unogona kudikanwa nguva kuti udzose huropi (s) kuhutano hwekunze. Rega zvisikwa zviitwe. Panguva iyi, sarudza zvinhu zvinonyaradza pasina kuwedzera-kukurudzira: kurovedza muviri, kushamwaridzana kwehukama, kufungisisa, nguva muzvisikwa, kushanda kune vamwe, nezvakadaro. Kana zvichibvira, ivai nemumwe wako mu rupo kwete-foreplay rudo; iyo ichakubatsira kukudzosa zvakare mumutambo.
Kuora mwoyo kunoita kuti kusavimbika kuwedzere kunakidza.
Novelty inopa kukurumidza kwekudzivirira dopamine-uye inozogona kugadzirisa zvepabonde musikana ndeimwe yenzira dzinonakidza dzechirongwa. Uyo anoshanda naye, munhu uyo ari mu-chatroom yepaIndaneti, kana kuti iyo nyeredzi yepayona yose inotarisa zviri nani apo uropi hwako huri nhamba. Uye iwe hauzove nechero zano rekuti zvese zvauri kutsvaga chaizvo kugadzirisa dopamine. (Yedu majini shandisa izvi nenzira yekuvandudza mikana yavo yekufamba mune ramangwana.)
Kukwezva kweruzivo rwehuropi hwakashushikana kwakanyanya kunetsa nhasi. Isu takakomberedzwa neasingaperi runyorwa rwekunyengerera, kana kazhinji ichigadzirwa, zvekuita zvepabonde. Kana isu tichiramba “tichirapa” kusagadzikana kwedu kwekudzoreredza nekusimudzira kwakanyanya, huropi hwedu haugone kudzoka kuyerwa Mumwe mhedzisiro ndeyekuti huswa kazhinji rinotarisa ruvara kunze hukama.
Kukanganiswa kwehupfungwa hupfungwa kunogona kupindira nekubatana pakati pevakaroorana.
Kudanana kwezuva nezuva kunowanzo nyaradza uye kunopa mubayiro kune vaviri vakasungwa sesu - kunyangwe tikasaguma. (Kunyangwe akajairwa bonobo chimps usapedze nguva imwe neimwe vanozviwana.)
Asi chii chinoitika kana tisingakwanise kunzwa mafaro asinganzwisisike nekuda kwekukanganiswa kwehuropi kwenguva pfupi? Pfungwa yekungodanana haifadze. Iyo inogona kutonyoresa seisingabvumirwe. Panzvimbo yeunyoro, isu tingangoda nguva yenguva. Kana kuti pamwe isu tinoda kunyanyisa, kana kuwedzera kushinga, bonde-rinova rinonakidza uye rinoburitsa kusagadzikana, asi richisimudzira dambudziko rekushushikana.
Vamwe vedu tinowanzoedza kuyedza kunze-kwe-sync libidos nekutendeukira kune yakasimba bonde-rubatsiro uye bonhora. Nehurombo, anhasi vibrators uye akanyanya porn mavhidhiyo anoita mabasa avo nehukasha hwakadai hwavanogona mberi kudarika-kukurudzira uye kubata mhinduro yekunakidzwa kwehuropi. Mushure menguva, kufunga kwepabonde zvakajairika nemumwe waunoziva kungasakwanazve simba pamusoro peshuwo kuti iyanane.
Zvokuita?
Kuda kwakanyanya kwepabonde kunonetsa, asi vakaroorana vane rudo vanogonawo kutambura pamusoro pekugona kunyaradza musikana asingagoneki. Vamwe vakaroorana vakakumbira, bicker uye vanoita musoro. Vamwe vanotaurirana manheru masikati uye nyasha dzepabonde. Vamwe vanotora mabasa mumaguta akasiyana-siyana kana mabasa anoda zvakawanda zvokufamba, saka ubongo hwavo vane nguva yekudzoka kuenzanisa. Mumwe murume akati,
Ini ndakamboshanda munzvimbo iri kure yekubhururuka-mukubhururuka-basa, vhiki mbiri, mavhiki maviri ekuzorora. Nekuda kweizvozvo, mukadzi wangu neni takafadzwa noupenyu hwepabonde hwakanakisisa hwemuchato wedu. Kudzoka kumba yaive nguva yekuchengetedzwa, kunyanya pese pandaibata ndege yaindidzosa kumba vana vasati vasvika kumba. Asi isu takacherechedzawo nguva yekuenda. Sezvaakataura, "Ndinoifarira kana uchisvika kumba, uye ndinoifarira kana waenda."
Zviripachena, iko kutukwa kwekusimudzira bonde kunotungamira (kwechinguva) kudzikisira kupindura uye kusagutsikana harisi dambudziko nyowani. Makore zviuru zviviri zvakapfuura, mudetembi wechiRoma Ovid akapa zano remushonga wekutsvinya werudo achiti: "Nakidzwa nemusikana wako nekusiiwa zvachose, siku nesikati - uye kuvenga kuchapedza urwere hwako." Izvi zvinogona kuve ndosaka vachenjeri pasirese vakagadzira matekiniki ekugadzirisa bonde kuchengetedza vadikani muchiyero nekubatsira vanotsigira kubatana kwevamwe vakabatana. Kosher pabonde, somuenzaniso, inotsanangura mavhiki mashoma pamwedzi mumabhedha akasiyana.
Rangarira, kusava nehanya kwewawakaroorana naye (kana kufunga-kwega) kunogona kunge kuri chimwe chinhu kunze kwekurara kwenzara maseru receptors anokonzerwa nekuwandisa kwechinhu chakanaka. Kana zvirizvo, saka ako ekunze-sync-libidos haisi mhosva yemumwe munhu. Edza kugadzirisa dambudziko parinomuka. Rega uropi hwako hudzokere pakunzwisisa kwaro kwakanaka. Tarisa uone kana chiyero chakakura chichiita mafaro asinganyatso kunakira-uye nekuwedzera, iwe nemumwe wako munotarisa kugona kune umwe neumwe.
___
* Mutsva yapfuura, vatsvakurudzi vakati kuti pane imwe nguva mhuka imwe kana mbiri yegumi neimwe kana yakaedzwa saizvozvo haana kuratidza izvi zvakashata (zvakapedzwa D2 receptors).
Updates
- Chirwere chekuongorora chirwere? Nyika inonyanya kushandiswa kurapwa kwekurapa, The International Classification of Diseases (ICD-11), ine itsva yekuongorora akakodzera kunyadzisira kunetseka: "Kunyanya Kuita Zvepabonde Zvirwere. "(2018)
- Zvinonyadzisira / kurara pabonde? Peji ino inonyora 39 neuroscience-based studies (MRI, fMRI, EEG, neuropsychological, hormonal). Vanopa rubatsiro rwakasimba pamushambadziro wekutsvaga zvinodhaka sezvo zvavakawana zvinongoratidzira zvakawanikwa neurological inonzi muzvinhu zvinodhaka zvinodhaka.
- Ichokwadi nyanzvi 'maonero panyaya yekuona zvinonyadzisira / zvepabonde? Urongwa urwu hune 16 yazvino zvinyorwa zvekuongorora & zvinyorwa nedzimwe nyanzvi dzepamusoro dzenyika munyika. Zvose zvinotsigira mufananidzo wezvinodhaka.
- Zviratidzo zvekudhakwa uye kukura kune zvimwe zvinhu zvakanyanyisa? Pamusoro peongororo makumi matatu dzichitsvaga zvakawanikwa zvinowirirana nekuwedzera kwekushandisa kwepabonde (kushivirira), kugara kune zvinonyadzisira, uye kunyange kubvisa zviratidzo (zviratidzo zvose nezviratidzo zvinobatanidzwa nekudhakwa).
- Debunking nheyo yekutaura isingatsigiswi inoti "chido chepabonde chakakwirira" inotsanangurira kubvisa zvinonyadzisira kana kukanganisa zvepabonde: Angangoita 25 zvidzidzo zvinokanganisa kutaura kuti bonde & porn vanopindwa muropa "vanongova nehupombwe"
- Zvinonyadzisira nezvinetso zvepabonde? Iri runyora rine zvidzidzo zve 26 zvinosungiridza zvinonyadzisira zvinoshandiswa / zvinonyadzisira zvinodhaka kune zvinetso zvepabonde uye kuderedza kukwezva kune zvepabonde. The fzvisingaiti 5 zvidzidzo muurongwa zvinoratidza causation, sezvo vatori vechikamu vakabvisa kushandiswa kwepabonde uye vakaporesa zvirwere zvepabonde zvisingaperi.
- Zvinonyadzisira zvinokonzerwa nehukama? Zvinenge zvichitsvaga 60 zvidzidzo zvinobatanidza zvinonyadzisa zvinoshandisa kuderera kwepabonde uye kugutsikana kweukama. (Sezvatinoziva zvose zvidzidzo zvine chokuita nevanhurume zvakashuma zvekare kushandiswa kwepabonde kunosanganiswa murombo zvepabonde kana ukama kugutsikana.)
- Kukura kwesayenzi huchapupu hwehupenyu husati hwapera-orgasm cycle (zvidzidzo)
- Zvidzidzo zvekubatana kwepabonde nemishonga muuropi
;