Ohun ti o dun ni pe botilẹjẹpe Emi ko ṣe oṣu kan ni deede tabi paapaa awọn ọjọ 90 tabi ọdun laisi ihuwasi atijọ, awọn anfani ti Mo ti niro ti ṣee ṣe iyipada iyipada julọ ti Mo ti ṣe ninu igbesi aye mi.
- idojukọ - lẹhin bii ọjọ meji 2 lẹhin ifasẹyin kọọkan, idojukọ mi di kedere ati pe o rọrun pupọ lati maṣe rin kakiri sinu ala-ọjọ kan. Ninu ibaraẹnisọrọ Mo le ṣojumọ lori ohun ti eniyan n sọ ati bayi Mo le ka gangan ju gbolohun lọ laisi idamu. Eyi ṣe iranlọwọ pẹlu iṣẹ mi, ikẹkọọ, awọn ibatan, ajọṣepọ ati ohunkohun pẹlu idi kan.
- Igbẹkẹle - eyi jẹ anfani pataki julọ fun mi bi awọn ibaraẹnisọrọ mi pẹlu awọn obinrin ti jẹ talaka. Mo le bayi ṣe ibaraẹnisọrọ ti oye pẹlu awọn obinrin alaileto ni ita. Jẹ ki a fi eyi sinu irisi. Ni Oṣu kọkanla ọdun 2011, yoo gba mi ni akoko pupọ lati beere lọwọ ọmọbirin ti o dara ti o dara fun awọn itọnisọna ni “ile-itaja” bi ọna lati ṣe ara mi ni ikanra lati sunmọ awọn obinrin. Bayi, o jẹ ibaraenisọrọ ti a le rẹrin ti kii yoo yi ọkan-ọkan mi pada diẹ. Paapaa awọn ọjọ 10 si igbiyanju akọkọ Mo n bẹrẹ awọn ibaraẹnisọrọ pẹlu awọn obinrin (kii ṣe lati gbe, ṣugbọn fun igbadun nikan). Mo ranti ni iyalẹnu bi igberaga ti emi ti jẹ. Eyi jẹ ọkan ninu awọn ayipada ayanfẹ mi.
- Physical stamina and strength – like my first example showed, this will not only give you more energy (which, as I will explain, must be spent elsewhere) but what you’re capable of will grow.
- Mental stamina and willpower – another special benefit that I’m grateful for. Remember how I never used to exercise and if I did, the workout would be laughable for poor effort and then I’d quit? Now I exercise 3 times a week and when I exercise I have that mental strength to push past the pain barrier. So even if my greater physical strength stumbles, my mind keeps me going. I work better at my job, I actually study (hypnotherapy), I can contain myself in heated discussions, I eat 1000 times better than I used to and so much more. I’ve actually kicked meat and dairy to the curb.
- Ailopin - ko si eniyan ti o nifẹ lati ni imọran si ẹni ti o kere si awọn eniyan miiran ati pe mo woye anfani yii diẹ sii nipasẹ awọn ailera mi ti aipẹhin pada lẹhin ifasẹyin. Eyi ko nilo alaye pupọ ati pe o tun le ṣalaye. Lẹhin igbati, Mo lero diẹ alaini, ẹdun, awọn iṣoro ati be be lo ati lẹhin ọsẹ kan ti abstinence bẹrẹ lati lero ti yiyipada .... Bi ọkunrin kan. Oro naa le jẹ ero-inu ati awọn ipa ti o kere si iye ṣugbọn o ṣe akiyesi rẹ ni iyipada awọn ọna laifọwọyi ti ọkàn wa ni oye ohun. Fun apẹrẹ, nigbati o ba joko ni idakeji ọmọbirin kan ti o wa lori ọkọ oju irin ati irin-ori Alpha kan ti o wa lori wa joko lẹgbẹẹ rẹ. Awọn ikunra ailewu jẹ gidigidi kere si ati ki o lero diẹ si i.
- Acne – after about a week or so, the acne gradually clears up and my skin starts to smooth out. Then I relapse and it comes back again 🙂
- Feeling differently about women – this may be because I’m not pleasuring myself to female degradation anymore but at around the 1 week mark, if I risk relapse by fantasizing, it’s more about romantic situations and not the nasty stuff anymore. I want to feel a human soul connection more and want to slam a girls head into my crotch less….and as I’m not a psychopath, that’s a great change. As this benefit has always started just as I relapse, I’ve never fully experienced it but hopefully this reversal back to my normal loving self will grow back stronger as I push on.
- jaw tightness and knee pain – this I’m sure is just me but my jaw tightness goes after a few days of abstinence and the day after relapse my right knee joint feels weak and painful. Not sure how this is linked though.
- Ifẹ ti o pọ si lati darapọ mọ awujọ - jasi nitori pe emi ko gba atẹgun mi lati ejaculating si ere onihoho, Mo bẹrẹ si nifẹ si ibarapọ ati gboju le won… nigbati o ba fẹ ba awọn eniyan sọrọ, wọn fẹran rẹ gangan (bẹẹni, lọ nọmba rẹ). Nọmba ti awọn akoko ti Mo gba ipe foonu kan tabi txt le ṣe atunṣe ni pato pẹlu fifa mi ti Mo ba gbasilẹ rẹ. Nigbakugba ti Mo ni binge, Emi ko ni bikita nipa ẹnikẹni ni agbaye fun awọn ọjọ diẹ. Kini iyalẹnu ni pe lakoko PMO ati lẹhin ifasẹyin, Mo ni irọrun ti iyalẹnu ti iyalẹnu sibẹsibẹ ni akoko kanna Emi ko fẹ lati mọ tabi bikita nipa ẹnikẹni. Emi yoo joko ni ibi iṣẹ tabi awọn ounjẹ alẹ ati pe o kan rii awọn eniyan bi ko ṣe pataki sibẹsibẹ sunkun ninu yara mi nitori rilara ki n nikan. Lakoko abstinence yiyipada ṣẹlẹ; botilẹjẹpe Mo fẹ lati sopọ mọ diẹ sii, Emi ko ni rilara bi nikan. Eyi jẹ ajeji pupọ, bẹ lẹwa ati ki o ṣe akiyesi pupọ lati inu ita.
Daydreaming – I don’t know how or why but during PMO years and after a relapse I found it very tough to get out of my own head. At that point my work suffers along with everything else; I’m just daydreaming. I’ve always been a big daydreamer yet I notice that after a week or two of abstinence, my desire to daydream is far reduced. I read an article about the difference between daydreams. We all have those 12 second daydreams that our minds wander into, but when people actively engage in their daydreams and having continual plots that they’ll pick up from where they left off, it indicates a real unhappiness with the world around them. I relate to this. When I have been 1-2 weeks free, even though I habitually begin to daydream, the want for it just isn’t there.
- Getting with women – I’ve had more sex in the year of up and down no fapping than at any other time in my life….FACT! with that combination of increased desire, more confidence, more risk taking, less anxiety, less inside my head, better attention in conversation etc., I was able to get myself a F.W.B and that’s amazing. She knows about my PMO and will read this coz I’m going to send her the link as well.
- empathy – this is similar to the socializing and feelings about women bit but I just care more about others and feel sad when I see something sad and feel happy for people when something positive happens to them. It’s really humanizing and it was that emotional numbness that first got me worried about my habit.
- Better orgasms…..that’s simple enough. If you don’t do it every day, when it does happen then it’s a genuine pleasure rather than just a fix. (TBC ….)
POST - 1 ỌKỌ NI AWỌN NI BẸẸLẸ NIPA 2
by danielsonUK
1 Year of ups and downs
(the entire piece is 5000 words so it’s broken into different posts)
The day that I upload this story is exactly 1 year (and a day) since beginning my no fap commitment. It’s especially meaningful for me as I’ve started writing a personal story many times, including on day one and never uploaded it. Although it’s been 1 year, I’ve had countless relapses so I’m not on 365 days free from fapping but I am very experienced in knowing what it’s like to fall off the horse and even more experienced at climbing back on. Here’s my story, 1 year into the personal change, starting with the same pre-reboot beginning that I wrote 366 days ago:
Dec 21, 2011- “I started Masturbating before I was old enough to “produce”, started watching porn at about 13 (and mostly romance or pics) and I’m now 24 I’m wanking twice a day and I’m mostly only able to get turned on by porn types that I’d prefer to not even mention and my ex could not make me O (I told her I was just advanced). 6 years ago, if you met me you would say that I’m warm, lively, approachable, easy going, full of spirit, bountiful, outgoing and connected to others emotionally. I was a real people’s person and plenty of girls fancied me (although I was always too shy to approach). Life itself was pleasurable and a big genuine smile would often span my face (I was known for my smile). Now, my social anxiety, stress, emotional numbness, inferiority, loneliness and anger are almost overpowering. I can’t even maintain eye contact! I really was so taken back when realising my problem. I knew that porn had bad effects because I’m into psychology and studying to be a therapist (hypnotherapist) but I hadn’t realised that I hit 7/7 for addiction and how all of those issues I’m dealing with coincide with this. I was actually watching a documentary about psychopaths and it said that their range of emotion is smaller, so they don’t feel guilt and sadness as much as normal people and they don’t feel joy or affection as much as other people. . It’s called a blunted affect. I think this is true for what PMO has done to me to a smaller extent. I find that although I want to end this horrible cycle, it has been filling a void and comforting me but actually making the void bigger as well. I’ve tried to stop before but never lasting more than 2 days. My motivation now is so strong…. let’s see how things unfold”
Dec 20, 2012 – So here’s my story in retrospect. I’m 25, and looking back over this period of self-discovery, I’ve realised that as a teenager I vented my growing teenage sexual mind into a tissue instead of using it to get girls. As a result, I never gained the motivation or knowhow to approach girls which lead to more anxiety and more solitary venting. I have an addictive past (smoking, food and MJ), none of which I overcame without outside help. On the 6th morning, I woke up at 5am with more energy than I remember having ever. I ordered an escort in utter horniness and drove to the cash machine to take out money. I wouldn’t normally book an escort. It’s not something I would do but I was so horny. As I parked up back home, I did something that was so unlike me and was a real surprise; I cancelled the escort. Normally I just wouldn’t have that sort of self-control. to add to this weird shit that was happening to me, I then put on shorts, a jumper and running shoes and took my dog for a run. Let’s be clear about this so we appreciate the extent of change that happened to me in just 6 days and how far from my “normal” self this behaviour was. I NEEEEVER exercise!!! I’ve written more workout routines than the number of press-ups I’ve done. yet at 7am on the 27th December in England (fucking freezing cold and grey), I ran for miles…..and it felt amazing…like I could run over anything. That first attempt at no fap lasted for 16 days and in 1 days’ time, that record will be broken for the first time. Technically I edged during that attempt and I haven’t edged at all on this one. Over the course of the year I’ve fallen off the horse so many times, it’s hard to imagine how someone could keep getting back up and stick with it. Some may think that because I haven’t made it 90 days on the first try that my advice is less important but in fact I think that’s why my story is so needed. I know what the struggle is like and I know what learning curbs are. The guys who need to read these stories the most are the guys who, like me, know what it’s like to fall down.
So that was my introduction. From now on, with all this experience under my belt, I’m going to segment my piece into 1) Benefits, 2) Drawbacks/Withdrawal, 3) Rebooting advice and tips, and 4) General Summary.
1 ỌKỌ NI AWỌN NI BẸẸLẸ NIPA 3
Apá 3 2) Well, I really haven’t had withdrawals like other people. No colds, sweats or any of that stuff. Maybe that’s because I haven’t gone past a total 2 weeks. If my benefits seem to have accumulated over the year of ups and downs, wouldn’t also my withdrawals? I do sometimes get really low…like deathly low but I feel like I’m past that stage. I have experienced flat lining and it’s definitely an odd one. I didn’t find it horrifically scary like some other guys and once you’re used to it, take it as an advantage for not wanting to relapse. Other than that the only drawback is temporarily being denied of a momentary pleasure. In context that’s hardly a drawback.
3) I could summarize the strategy for effectively overcoming this addiction and many others into 2 broad categories; fences and pathways.
FENCES are things you do to make it more difficult for you to fap and make you less vulnerable to the temptation.
PATHWAYS guide you in the right direction, making your journey easier and life better, filling the void with better behaviours.
In order to effectively know and enact those strategies, it’s important to get to “know thyself”. Some guys make it to their timed goal first try but many of us relapse. By having a calendar that you use to track abstinence and lapse, you’ll become a lot more conscious of what is behind your behaviour. My calendar is not just a tick or cross. I rank the previous day on a scale of 1-5 (5=perfect abstinence, 1=complete PMO) and then I write about 5-10 words accompanying. This could be “meditated, exercised and avoided you tube” on a good day or “perved at that magazine and lingered in bed” on a bad day. After a while you will get to know those vulnerable situations that make relapse more likely. Here are some that I’ve become aware of from my journey (and their corresponding FENCES): • Randomly and un-purposely surfing the web, especially YouTube and Facebook where I stumble across a picture or vid that includes attractive girls (like the friend of a friends profile that I click on just coz her photo’s cute). Minimize time surfing the web, and only use it for what you went on for in the first place. There will be a gap forming that this used to fill. What are you going to fill it with?
• Hands down pants. Even if I’m not fantasizing, pure physical touch can stimulate. This effect can linger below the surface (no pun intended) throughout the day.
• Fantasizing, even if it’s just romantic or of me flirting with a girl. This will get easier with time.
• Daydreaming that’s unrelated to sex at all. This kind of puts my mind into that imagination mode which makes fantasy more likely
• Lying in bed awake at night or in the morning. These two were MAJOR risk factors for me as I worked out from my calendar that around 80% of relapses were when I was already in bed.
• Eating crap – this is more to do with avoiding the bad foods that will lead to a sugar crash then it is about optimum nutrition. If you have MacDonald’s and then feel crappy later, you’re more likely to seek out a sure fire way to feel better again, right?
• Having nothing to do on the weekend or after work. Too much time on your hands, especially in the location where you most typically PMO (like home) is a massive problem. General but massively important and critical FENCE regarding these last two points; minimize the exposure you have to the times and places where you most commonly PMO. For me, lingering in bed am or pm and having nothing to do on evenings and weekends at home are risky so I only get into bed at the very last minute (lights have even been off for ten minutes as light keeps us awake and dark tires us quicker). I make sure that on the weekend, even if I can’t fill my day, the mornings are the key element. If I do nothing in the morning, the whole day ends up being a bum/slob day. GET OUT!
• Perving at girls around me. It’s neither helpful, nor is it going to get you laid. If you look, approach.
• Magazines and newspapers. Since moving out, I haven’t been walking past my mom’s stack of women’s magazines with hot celebs inside. Phew! Avoid these magazines if you can and certainly don’t read them.
• TV and Film. Pretty easy to spot because almost every film now has a hot girl in it. Especially in the more difficult first weeks, just avoid watching movies or too much TV. My PATHWAYS section will help you with alternatives.
• Adverts. I hate, I hate, and I HATE adverts. They’re like leeches trying to suck the soul out of you to make a quick buck. Check out this funny vid about TV adverts http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cf7uWRLqfgw&list=UU6co8_uGCP_EUQKGZguG63Q&index=4 adverts are designed to take advantage of your deepest most animalistic desires (sex and status) to manipulate you for a corporation’s goal of taking yours or someone else’s money. And guess what….they’re very good at it. As a hypnotherapist I can identify the hypnotic nature of adverts. At the very least turn off the volume but at best, just change the channel or turn the TV off.
• General negative emotions. I also noticed that feeling frustrated about anything, from my noisy neighbours to my overbearing Jewish mother could act as a trigger or even pre-trigger. Going on housing websites and checking out all the mansions I can’t buy puts me in a mind-set of wanting which also can make pleasure seeking (food and sex)more likely. Seeing glorified “males” on TV get put on a pedestal by women makes me jealous and angry. What is it for you? Stress? Boredom? Tiredness? Guilt? Loneliness? And what things trigger those general feelings?
• No Laptop, Tablet or phone while in bed. If I stumble across a sexy pic accidentally while in bed, that’s far more risky than if I see it in a coffee shop. Also, the activation energy needed to start something can be surprisingly preventative. I try to keep them out of my room entirely
• Only use bed for sleep and sex. If much of the relapses happen “there”, minimize time “there”
• Expanding on the last point, minimize time in the places, situations and times where and when you relapse or just PMO the most. For me it was being in bed for longer than necessary and being at home with nothing to do, especially on the weekends. What are your times and places?
1 ỌKỌ NI AWỌN NI BẸẸLẸ NIPA 4
Agbara ifẹ nikan ko to. Agbara ifẹ le ti re bi ohun gbogbo ti eniyan miiran. Lilo awọn odi oke ati awọn ONA ti o wa ni isalẹ yoo dinku iwulo rẹ lati ṣiṣẹ funrararẹ. Pupọ julọ ihuwasi wa wa ni aimọ. Eyi jẹ nipa ṣiṣẹda awọn ọgbọn lati lo aimọkan wa ni ojurere wa.
Nigbati o ba yọ idunnu nla kan kuro, ofo yoo wa ti o nilo kikun. Ti o ko ba fi awọn igbadun ti o ni anfani kun ofo, ofo yẹn yoo kun nikẹhin lẹhinna kii yoo wa pẹlu ohun ti o dara fun ọ. Ofo yoo pa soke ti o ba sẹ idunnu fun igba diẹ ṣugbọn kilode ti o fi jẹ ki awọn nkan le si ara rẹ? Mo lo ọrọ naa “akojọpọ idunnu” lati ṣapejuwe lilo awọn igbadun kekere pupọ lati jẹ ki igbesi aye rọrun ni apapọ lakoko ti MO mu laisi nini idunnu nla yẹn lati iṣaaju. O tun din awọn anfani ti a bẹrẹ miiran afẹsodi nigba ti timeframe. Eyi ni awọn ipa ọna mi ti o gbẹkẹle julọ:
- Iṣaro - Mo le fa ibaramu ti o han julọ laarin iṣe iṣaroye mi (iṣaro ọkan) ati abstinence mi. Iṣaro ṣe nọmba kan ti awọn nkan (ti a fihan ni imọ-jinlẹ). O ṣe akiyesi akiyesi ati iṣakoso ti ọkan. Nigbati irokuro kan ba jade si ori rẹ, iwọ yoo ni anfani lati jẹ ki aworan yẹn lọ ki o tun ọkan rẹ si ibomiran ni irọrun diẹ sii. Pupọ dinku wahala ati awọn ikunsinu odi miiran. Ni pataki julọ o jẹ ki o mọ diẹ sii kini kini awọn ikunsinu odi yẹn jẹ gaan ki a maṣe gbe lọ pẹlu wọn. Lẹhin iṣaro, ọkan wa ni idakẹjẹ ati kedere, awọn nkan lero iyanu.
- Idaraya - ni kete ti o ba de awọn ọjọ diẹ, iwọ yoo rii nipa ti ara kan iye agbara ti o nilo lati lo bakan. Gẹ́gẹ́ bí ajá tí wọn kì í gbé e lọ, a máa ń ya wèrè láìlo agbára wa. Idaraya jẹ rọrun pupọ nigbati Emi ko PMO ati pe o jẹ ọna iranlọwọ pataki lati ni irọrun (lẹhin adaṣe), yọkuro aapọn, mu oorun dara (ranti bi o ṣe ṣe pataki lati sun ni iyara nigbati o ba sùn) ati ni gbogbogbo lero dara.
- Ibaṣepọ – Nigba miiran Emi ko ni itunu lati lọ sinu awọn eto ẹgbẹ ṣugbọn ni ọjọ keji Mo maa ji ni rilara dara julọ ju lailai. Awọn iwulo awujọ ni pato ni asopọ si eyi nitori pe o ni lati ṣe pẹlu oxytocin atagba nkankikan eyiti o jẹ kemikali ifẹ / asopọ.
- Gba ọrẹ cuddle - awọn idi jẹ kanna bi loke. Mo pade ọmọbirin yii ti o wa yika ati pe a nigbagbogbo dubulẹ papọ ni wiwo TV ati pe o dara nitori pe o jẹ ọna iyalẹnu lati ṣii ati rilara isunmọ kan. O gbona okan gaan. Iṣe iyalẹnu kekere ti biba lẹgbẹẹ ẹnikan laisi paapaa sọrọ le ni awọn ipa iyalẹnu ni awọn ọjọ atẹle.
- Iwe ito iṣẹlẹ ọpẹ - eyi wa lori oju opo wẹẹbu YBOP labẹ awọn irinṣẹ adashe. Ẹri ikọja fihan pe nkan ti o rọrun yii yoo mu iṣesi gbogbogbo rẹ pọ si ti o ba faramọ rẹ.
- Nini awọn ibi-afẹde SMART. Iyẹn ni pato, Iwọnwọn, Ti ṣee ṣe, Otitọ ati awọn ibi-afẹde ti akoko. Wipe “Emi kii yoo wo ọmọbirin mọ” ko ṣee ṣe. Tikalararẹ, Emi ko fẹran ipenija ọjọ 90 nitori pe o fi ibi-afẹde si laini ti o ṣe awọn nkan…. IJA. Boya o kan idojukọ lori awọn akoko kukuru ni akoko kan bi ipari ose ati lẹhinna ọsẹ tabi o kan sọ " KO FUN MI, O ṣeun "Ṣugbọn mo mọ pe nini iwe-aṣẹ ọjọ 90 kan lori ogiri mi jẹ ki ibi-afẹde naa han nira ati dinku igbagbọ-ara mi. Tikalararẹ, ti o ti ni iriri ni eyi, Mo gba awọn nkan ni ọjọ kan ni akoko kan ati ki o fojusi nikan lori ohun ti o le ṣe iranlọwọ tabi di mi lọwọ ni akoko isinsinyi (lakoko ti o mọ ni ẹhin ọkan mi pe iyipada ihuwasi yii jẹ fun igbesi aye).
- Ilana akoko sisun - lẹẹkansi, ti awọn ipo alailewu rẹ ba ni ibatan si ibusun, ṣeto ilana ṣiṣe ti o ṣe iranlọwọ fun ọ lati sun ni yarayara bi o ti ṣee ni kete ti o ba wa lori ibusun ati lati fun ọ ni oorun ti o dara julọ ti ṣee ṣe pe nigbati o ba ji, iwọ ' tunu ati pe o le jade kuro ni ibusun ni irọrun diẹ sii. Oorun alẹ ti o dara jẹ pataki fun iṣesi wa ati iṣakoso wahala. Ohun kan ti o ṣe pataki fun mi ni lati tan ina si isalẹ nipa awọn iṣẹju 20 ṣaaju ki o to lọ si ibusun ati da gbogbo awọn ẹrọ itanna duro bi foonu ati bẹbẹ lọ ni iṣẹju mẹwa 10 ṣaaju ki o to. Eleyi afẹfẹ mi si isalẹ. Mo máa ń jí ní ìtura nígbà gbogbo tí mo bá ń lo àkókò ìrọ̀lẹ́.
- Ara-hypnosis – ti o ba tun jẹ ọkan ninu awọn eniyan wọnyẹn ti o gbagbọ hypnosis jẹ iru idan tabi iṣakoso ọkan, Mo daba pe ki o ṣe iwadii diẹ sii. Hypnosis le ṣe iranlọwọ iyalẹnu pẹlu ọpọlọpọ awọn ibi-afẹde. Laanu, pupọ julọ awọn igbasilẹ ohun afetigbọ iTunes, pataki fun ere onihoho, kii ṣe iyalẹnu lati irisi hypnotherapists (ṣugbọn wọn ṣe iranlọwọ, paapaa ti o ba gbọ nigbagbogbo). Paapaa, o le lo awọn igbasilẹ ohun fun awọn ọran miiran ti o sopọ mọ PMO bii aapọn tabi oorun tabi iwuri adaṣe ati be be lo. O jẹ ẹrin pupọ pe bi ọmọ ile-iwe hypnotherapy ni akoko yẹn, Mo yago fun wiwa iranlọwọ alamọdaju ni gbogbo idiyele ati lẹhinna nigbati Mo ṣe, ohun gbogbo di igba miliọnu rọrun.
Kini lati ṣe nigbati ifẹ ba dide? Gẹgẹ bi Gary lati YBOP sọ, o ko le funfun knuckle yi ati ki o gbekele lori willpower nikan. Ọna ti o dara julọ lati bori eyi ni lati gbẹkẹle awọn ilana ti o jẹ ki iwulo fun agbara ifẹ ko ṣeeṣe. Bibẹẹkọ, ti o ba pade akoko ifẹ, eyi ni diẹ ninu awọn nkan ti o le rii wulo:
1) Yọ ara rẹ kuro ni ayika. Lọ kuro ni yara tabi ile naa ati pe iwọ yoo rii iyipada ipinlẹ rẹ ni iyara. Paapa ti o ba tun ni idanwo naa, agbara rẹ lati ṣiṣẹ lori rẹ dinku. Bi o ti yọkuro diẹ sii, diẹ sii ni iyipada ti ipo ọpọlọ.
2) Lọ fun awakọ kan. O jẹ idamu ati orin ti o wa ninu ọkọ ayọkẹlẹ yoo tun ṣe iranlọwọ
3) Lọ fun rin tabi jog. Eyi yoo lo agbara afikun yẹn, tu awọn endorphins, serotonin ati dopamine ati pe yoo fun ọ ni akoko lati ko ori rẹ kuro.
4) Wo imurasilẹ-soke awada. Mo mọ TV ti ko ba niyanju sugbon imurasilẹ-soke awada ni ojo melo o kan ilosiwaju buruku, ṣiṣe awọn wa lero ti o dara nipa belittling ara wọn ati awọn gbajumo osere ti a ni ife lati korira.
5) Gba 5-HTP. O dara, nitorina Emi ko sọ eyi si gbogbo eniyan. 5-HTP jẹ lẹwa Elo awọn afikun serotonin. Serotonin jẹ ki a ni itara ati idunnu diẹ sii ati ni awọn iwọn lilo ti o tobi julọ ni a lo fun itọju ibanujẹ ati aibalẹ.
Emi ko ṣeduro awọn afikun gaan bi ohun elo pataki lati bori iṣoro yii ṣugbọn wọn le ṣe akiyesi bi ẹya ilera ọpọlọ ti ọpa ti nrin. Ti o ba ṣe ipalara ẹsẹ rẹ, lakoko ti awọn nkan ṣe inira gaan, o le ṣe iranlọwọ fun ọ lati duro ni ọtun. Lẹhinna bi awọn nkan ṣe dara diẹ sii, wọn ṣe atilẹyin fun ọ lakoko ti o ṣe itọju ailera gidi (ninu ọran yii iṣaro, adaṣe, awujọ ati bẹbẹ lọ) ati lẹhinna o yọ wọn kuro patapata lakoko ti o tẹsiwaju itọju ailera naa. Ti o ba lo wọn lojoojumọ, o n di igbẹkẹle ati oogun eyiti o tako aaye ominira. Ṣugbọn o le ṣe bi igi ti nrin ni awọn akoko lile paapaa. Gary lati YBOP jẹ ẹtọ ni pe iṣoro yii ko si nibi nitori aipe afikun kan. Jọwọ ṣọra pẹlu rẹ jọwọ.
6) Iyika Iyika Oju ati Atunse. Emi kii yoo ṣe alaye rẹ ni kikun ki Google o ti o ko ba mọ tẹlẹ. O ti lo fun rudurudu aapọn lẹhin-ti ewu nla ati pe o wuyi pupọ pọ si akiyesi nitorina awọn ohun miiran (bii ohun onihoho iro yẹn ti o lo lati gbagbọ pe o tumọ si nkankan) yọkuro lati akiyesi naa.
7) gbadura. Emi kii ṣe bi Emi kii ṣe onigbagbọ ṣugbọn fun diẹ ninu yin Mo ni idaniloju pe eyi le jẹ itunu. Ti o ba sọ ọrọ yii pẹlu agbara ati idi ti o ga julọ, isọdọkan ọkan ati ọkan rẹ pẹlu agbara ti o ga julọ ati idi yoo fun awọn orisun rẹ lagbara lati lọ si ọna ti o tọ.
Kini wiwo mi lori nini ibalopo lakoko atunbere? Tikalararẹ Mo ro pe ti o ko ba n bọsipọ lati ED, lọ fun. Iyẹn ni pato ohun ti ara rẹ nilo; lati mọ riri ẹwa gidi ni agbaye yii. Išọra mi kan ni lakoko ti nini ibalopọ jẹ nla fun atunbere, iranti rẹ tabi ifojusona rẹ le jẹ ifosiwewe eewu fun apẹẹrẹ sexting.
1 YEAR OF UPS AND DOWNS PART 5 (SUMMARY)
4) SUMMARY – Relapse. This extract is from my first fail about a year ago. Reading it now I realise how naïve I was. This is typical for beginners…. “Jan/6 – FAIL!!! It started with thoughts about women, then I went on a dating site, then an adult dating site, then after being aroused I just went to check out some porn “but I won’t M of course”. Then I was edging myself. It was actually the first time I was edging myself during abstinence. Then, during the same clip where I consciously said to myself that I’ll just edge, a highly arousing bit of the clip happened and I just went for it. My brain shut down. The orgasm was immensely powerful but so empty and not worth doing. I feel so ashamed. Tired and ashamed. I came so far really was so certain that I wasn’t going to stumble. All those changes… the confidence, the assertiveness, the stamina, energy, emotional rebalancing and so many more positive changes that I’ve dreamed about for so long …….. F*CK !!!!! Start again ” Relapse is a hiccup, not a rewind. You’re not starting again from day one because this technically is not about the number of days but about the changes in your brain (and that doesn’t go back to square one with a single hiccup). Pick yourself up, identify the trigger, identify what you could have done differently, and keep moving to the life you deserve because it’s a great place to be.
Excessive masturbation to porn is NOT the problem. I repeat, it is NOT the problem. It’s no more the problem than someone’s overeating or shooting heroin. All of these unhelpful behaviours are our minds SOLUTION to another problem in our lives. The reason how this 14 day streak has been incredibly easy has been because I saw a hypnotherapist who opened my eyes to this truth and during hypnosis, I worked on my deep, inner problems like my lifelong fear or unwillingness to experience discomfort. Once I was able to appreciate at an unconscious level that I don’t need to feel comfortable all the time, discomfort is much easier to handle. You may be here to overcome PMO but really PMO is just a poor solution to your real problem. My advice is to understand what your real problem is and solve it better. The desire to PMO will subside more easily as you do that.
I’m flying to a luxury resort in Thailand for 2 weeks tomorrow so I know that abstinence will be a million times easier (no triggers and in paradise). I’m going to give a 30 day update when I return which should give greater insight for you guys. MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY HANNUKAH
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