Ukuzonwabisa okukhawulezayo okwanamhlanje kunokubangela iimpawu ezingaqondakaliyo
Abantu abaninzi, ngaphandle kwesini, basebenzisa kakhulu i-intanethi yanamhlanje e-porno, ukhetho lwe-cybersex kunye nezinto zokudlala ngesondo. Ngapha koko, loo mntu mtsha uthandana naye mhlawumbi, naye.
Uvavanyo lwesondo alukho isizathu sokuba nehlazo, kodwa nokuba ungacingi ukuba uvuselelo lwe-erotic luyinto efanelekileyo, uhlawulela ukuba uqaphele iziphumo ezizezinye izibini ezibikayo. Ngaphandle koko, ungabonwa ngongxaki engalindelekanga, kwaye ugqibe ukuzitsho into into engenzi lutho nawe, ubulili bakho okanye ubuchule bakho phakathi kwamaphepha.
Ukuvuselela i-synthetic kungaba nokuthanda
Ngaba uyakholelwa ukuba, "Abantu abayi kujikela kwi-cybersex / kwi-Intanethi ukuba banokwabelana ngesondo kangangoko bafuna nomnye umntu we-libido eyaneleyo?" Mhlawumbi oko kwakuyinyaniso. Akusekho. Inyaniso ye-bald sele iyinto ye mihla yokudlala. Nangona kunjalo kunokuba yinto ephazamisayo xa iqabane lakho likhetha ukuvuselela izinto ezingekhoyo nokuba sele ukulungele kwaye ukulungele ukumonwabisa.
Umhlobo wamadoda malunga nomhla wakutshanje, "Ubuncinci ndingathanda ukuba andinike ithuba ngaphambi kokuba akhuphe isidlidlizi." Nantsi ke imbono yabasetyhini:
Ndithathwa njengobukeka kakuhle, ndizigcina ndomelele, kwaye ndikhangeleka ndimncinci kakhulu kuneminyaka yam. Bendihlala ndingakhathali xa umyeni wam ebukele iphonografi kuba ndiyayithanda nam, ngamanye amaxesha. Kodwa ngoku angayibukela emva kwam. Andiyifumani. Ndifuna ukwenza zonke ezo zinto kwiividiyo kunye naye kodwa angathanda nje ukubaleka. Ndindedwa kwaye ndothukile. Ndidiniwe kukungalali nomntu ukuba ndicinga ngokushiya. Ukhulile kwaye akasakwazi ukulala ngesondo rhoqo. Andikwazi ukuphila ubomi obungenasondo.
Kutheni umntu enokukhetha ukulala ngokwesondo? Ngenxa yokuba isinto esinokoqobo, okanye izibilini ezingaphezu kwamanye amazwe, kwenza ukuba kube nzima ezinjengobungakanani beziyobisi ukuba akukho mlingane oqhelekileyo onokulingana. Nangona iphakamileyo eveliswe ngokukhawulezileyo ayinjalo phumeza as ngesondo nawe, ingaba ngaphezulu nyanzela phantsi kweemeko ezithile.
Ukuqonda ukuba le meko ingaqhelekanga, yenzululwazi-yintsomi ivela njani, kuya kufuneka uyazi kancinci malunga ne-neurochemistry yenkqubo yokutya kwengqondo kunye nendlela inxibelelana nezixhobo ezincedisa ukwabelana ngesondo namhlanje. Ngokufutshane, nganye ividiyo entsha, ukuzingela umfanekiso ogqwebileyo, i-toy buzz ye-toy, i-inthanethi ye-inthanethi, kwaye Ukwabelana ngesondo ngomlomo kwakho konke kukhulula i-neurotransmitter ebizwa ngokuba yi-dopamine. Yiyo “Uyifumene!” I-neurochemical emva kwazo zonke iziyobisi. Enye indoda ichaze indlela i-intanethi echaphazela ngayo ingqondo yakhe:
Ukukhawuleza kwe-dopamine kuyaphambana ne-Intanethi. Igqobhoza ubuchopho kwaye uyasebenza cumming ngaphandle kokwenza kwanto. Luvakalelo olunxilisayo.
Ngelishwa, i-dopamine eninzi kakhulu inokuphazamisa impendulo yengqondo ye-dopamine, ishiye iqabane kungekudala liziva lincinci, lixhalabile-kwaye linqwenela enye ukumiliselwa kwe-dopamine ngeendlela ezikhawulezayo, ezinqabileyo. Kwimeko yengqondo, nkqu nokuhlangana okunothando kakhulu kungabonakala kungumsebenzi. I-intanethi ye-intanethi okanye i-vibrator, nangona kunjalo, iya kunika ukulungiswa kwexesha elidlulileyo kwintliziyo. Zombini ezamanyala kunye nezesondo zokudlala zinamandla okugqitha iindlela eziqhelekileyo zesini kwingqondo. Oku kuthetha ukuba yonke into ekhutshiweyo i-dopamine iyakhutshwa, ikhathaza ezinye iingqondo kulonwabo (ukunciphisa ubuntlupheko kwi-dopamine).
Uyabona ingxaki? Kwimeko enjalo, iqabane lakho eliqhutywa kukusetyenziswa kokuvuselelwa kwezinto zokwenziwa akubonakalisi kuwe okanye uthando lwakho olukhulu.
Kwaye, ngokwenene, njengoko Davy Rothbart uchaza, I-sex-star sex ye-porn ingaba yinto yokucima. Inokungena endleleni yokonwabela izipho ezabelana ngesondo ezisebenzisanayo: ukubamba ngothando, ukuvumba kwenyama, kunye nobuhlobo. Eyona nto iphambili: Abathandi abalungileyo banamhlanje banokubetha eludongeni olwalungaqhelekanga kookhokho babo: Iqabane lakho lisenokwaneliseka ngokupheleleyo ngokwesondo-ukanti usafuna ukuvuselelwa ngamandla ukuze uthomalalise iminqweno evela kwi-dopamine dysregulation- ngelixesha ume ngxi ungenakuzinceda.
Ukungabi nokuphendula ngokwesondo ngexesha lezesondo
Abasetyhini baqala ukuxela ukuba i-vibrator kunye / okanye ukusetyenziswa koonobumba kubangela ukuba bangahambisani nesini nesithintelo esivamile.
Andizange ndikholelwe ekusebenzeni kakuhle kwe-vibrator yam. Isebenze kakuhle. Kwisithuba senyanga, ndandingasenakukwazi ukwenza i-orgasm kunye nesithandwa sam, kwaye kwiinyanga ezimbalwa emva koko, andizange ndikwazi ukuyenza ngesandla sam kwakhona. Ukuvuselelwa kwakunzima kangangokuba ndangena ngaphantsi komzuzu omnye (akunjalo njengobomi bokwenene!). Ukwabelana ngesondo okwenyani ngekhe kube nakho ukulinganisa oko. Ukuba bendiqala ukusebenzisa iphonografi kwi-Intanethi, bendiya kugqibela ndingomnye wabo bantu bangasakwazi kuvulwa ngaphandle kwayo.
Ngelo xesha, amadoda amaninzi anika ingxelo nge-intanethi i-porn kunye uhlala nengxoxo no kuhamba kancane zabo novelwano. Enyanisweni, uphando olutshanje lwamaNtaliyane luqinisekisile ukuba ukusetyenziswa kakubi kwezilwanyana ezingamanyala kukubangela ukukhula okungafaniyo (i-anorexia yesondo) kumajoni. Esinye seziphumo zokuphelisa ubuntununtunu bengqondo kukonwaba ziingxaki zokusebenza ngokwesondo (ngamanye amaxesha zigutyungelwe njengesidingo sobutsha okanye ukuvuseleleka ngamandla ngoxinzelelo olungaphezulu kunokuba i-orifices yomzimba inokuhambisa ngokukhuselekileyo rhoqo).
Ukungasebenzi kakuhle kwe-Erectile ngexesha lokuxubana kuya kuxhaphaka kakhulu phakathi kwabasebenzisi abanzima be-porn kangangokuba amadoda kwiiforum aqalise ukucebisana ukuba kuqhelekile ukuba kufuneke ukuba kukhuthazwe amandla ezandla kunye ne-Intanethi ukuze kugcinwe ulwakhiwo. (Akunjalo, kwaye abo banikezela ngoononophala ngokubanzi ukufumana amandla abo.)
Bendihlala ndinobudlelwane obusempilweni kunye nomfazi wam de ndaye ndanxila kwi-porn kunye ne-masturbation. Ndacinga ukuba ndingangoyena mhlaba ubalaseleyo kodwa ekugqibeleni yandifumana. Ngoku ndijamelana neengxaki zokungasebenzi kakuhle kwe-erectile kwaye kuyaphazamisa ngokwengqondo yam kunye no-dick, ofumana kuphela isiqingatha esimileyo esikhokelela kumava aneentloni.
Omnye umfana:
Ndiphakathi kwamashumi amabini anesibini kwaye ndibe neengxaki zokufumana nokugcina i-erection kunye nabalingani bezesondo ekubeni ndiqalise ukukhangela i-porno malunga neminyaka emithandathu imihla edlulileyo. Ndiye kwii-GP ezahlukeneyo ngaphantsi kweminyaka kwaye ndihlala ndixelelwe ukuba andinayo ingxaki yenyama.
Ukunyanga okungazinzi kungakhokelela kwisini esingakhuselekanga
Nali ibali lendoda enye:
Ndingahlala ndilala ngesondo (my) myalelo, kodwa kwiminyaka yakutshanje ndibukele iphonografi kakhulu. Ngoku ndinengxaki yokulungiswa. Kukho amantombazana amaninzi aya kulala nam, kodwa kuphela ngeekhondom (ngokufanelekileyo). Kwinyanga ephelileyo, ndizamile ukulala ngesondo. Wenza konke awayenokukwenza ngokubhekisele phambili, kodwa ekugqibeleni wakhathazeka kwaye wandivumela ukuba ndingene ngaphandle kwekhondom. Ngenye imini kuye, ukulungiswa kwam kwaqala ukuqinisa. Emva koko waziva kakubi kwaye wandikhupha kuye. “Akukho khondom,” watsho, “akukho sini.” Indibonisile ukuba xa umntu enxanelwe ngokwaneleyo ukuba angaziphatha ngendlela eyingozi ngokwesondo. Oku akulunganga.
Endleleni egodukayo, ndalila nyani. Ukwabelana ngesondo bekuya kudala ubudlelwane obusondeleyo kunye nentombazana endiyifunayo, into ebesingazange sibe nayo okwethutyana. Ngesihlanganisile. Njengoko ndibhalayo ndiyaqaphela imeko. Intombi kunye nokuhlambalaza kodwa akukho noonografi: ukulungiswa. Intombi kunye nokuhlambalaza iphonografi: ukuthoba amandla kunye nokwabelana ngesondo okungakhuselekanga.
A Ucwaningo lwe-2002 ingxelo yokuba i-32% yabasebenzisi abakhondom abancinci babeneengxaki zokulungisa ngenxa yokusetyenziswa okungaphephile. Ngu 2006, inani lalingama-37%. Ngaba ukwanda kokusebenzisa kakubi iphonografi kuyinto ebangelwe yiyo? Ingaba yinto ebangela ingozi ukunyuka kwenyuka kwindawo yoluntu?
Yintoni kanye kanye ebangela ukuba kubekho ukungavani kolo lwalamano?
Bobabini imfuno efihliweyo yokuvuselela okwenziweyo xa i-dopamine isabela kwaye ukungabikho kokuqatshelwa kwindlela ukukhuthaza ukuxhatshazwa ngokobuxhakaxhaka kubangelwa ukuziphatha kakubi ngokwesini, kunokubangela ukuba abalingani benze iimpazamo eziphosakeleyo malunga noko kudala ukuxhatshazwa kobudlelwane.
Ndiye ndaqala ukuthetha ne ex yam kwakhona. Sibe nencoko emnandi malunga neziyobisi zam. Wayengazi ukuba ndinengxaki. Nam andizange, nangona kunjalo. Wachaza indlela endandibonakala ndikude ngayo xa ndabelana ngesondo, kwaye ndacacisa ukuba yayingekuba ndandingenamdla kwezesondo kodwa ngenxa yokuba ndandikhuthazeke kakhulu kangangokuba wayeza kufuneka ajongane neenyawo zakhe, encanca ihashe kwaye Ukurhabaxa [transsexual] ukuze ndivuseleleke xa ndisabelana naye ngesondo. Indenza ndicinge kwakhona ngobuhlobo bonke. Ngeli xesha ndandicinga ukuba iingxaki zethu zonke yayizezona zibangelwe yimpazamo yakhe [ukuba ndandikude kuba ndandithandana], kanti imikhwa yam yayiyeyona nto iphambili.
Omnye umntu:
Ngehlobo ephelileyo ndangena kubudlelwane endicinga ukuba buya kuba kukuphela kokuziphatha kwam kwe-PMO. Endaweni yoko, kwaphela iinyanga ezintandathu. Iinyanga zokuqala zazintle; Andizange ndibukele i-porn okanye i-masturbating. Kodwa ndazifumana ndibuyela kwi-PMO xa sasingabambisene, okanye ngobusuku xa sasingabelani ngesondo. Khange ndicinge ukuba oku kuya kwenzakalisa ubudlelwane bethu ngokwesondo okanye ubudlelwane ngelo xesha. Kodwa yenzekile. Ndiqale ukuphulukana nomdla kuye ngokwesondo nangona ngokwasemzimbeni eluhlobo lwam. Oku indlela ndothuka ukuba ndiphume!
Okokugqibela, nanku umntu obhinqileyo ebeka izimvo kwiinyanga ezithathe iqabane lakhe ukubuyisela umsebenzi oqhelekileyo:
Inkqubo yethu yokuphilisa ibe yinto engummangaliso. Ndithi "wethu" kuba ukubanakho ukubuyela kumlutha we-porn ngokuqinisekileyo yinto edibeneyo. Njengokuba nawuphina umntu obhinqileyo anokukrokrela, inokuthi isebenze kwiindawo ezingaboniyo xa kufikwa kukungazithembi kuye nakwakhe. Ukujongana nolu loyiko entloko NJENGOKO BAYAFIKA kubalulekile, kwaye andinakukugqithisa ukubaluleka koku.
Kwabo bantu bangaphandle aboyikayo babulale ipenisi yakho ngokulungileyo ngokuphulula amalungu esini: Musa ukoyika. Iyabuya nyani. Uthixo olungileyo uyabuya. Ufunga ukuba "ndenze ipipi yakhe yaba nkulu okanye enye into," kwaye ewe, yinto emangalisayo kunye ne-pulsating. Njengokubabaza njengoko ukumva esithi yinto endiyenzayo, yinto nje ephathekayo yesini esifanelekileyo kunye nokubuyiselwa kwemvakalelo. Iminyaka yomonakalo ngoku ibuyisiwe.
Ukuvuselelwa ngokwesondo okugqithisileyo kuxhaphaza isimilo esiqhelekileyo sokuziphatha komntu ngeendlela inkcubeko yethu engekamkelwa ngokubanzi, kodwa eneneni enokuqikelelwa ngokufanelekileyo inikwe uvelwano lobuchopho bomntu ukunyusa imeko. Ke ukuba ulwalamano lwakho aluphumeleli ngenxa yokonwatyiswa okuziinkozo namhlanje (kwaye awukakulungeli uzame into entsha), Chalk it up to experience-kwaye ungathandabuzi umtsalane wakho.
Ukukhula kobungqina benzululwazi yomjikelezo we post-orgasm (uphando)
Uphononongo malunga nokulala phakathi kwezesondo kunye neziyobisi kwiingqondo
UPDATES
- Ukuxilongwa ngokusemthethweni? Incwadi yokusetyenziswa kwezifo zonyango ngokubanzi, Ulwahlulo lwaMazwe ngamazwe (ICD-11), iqulethe uvavanyo olutsha ezifanele ukuxhatshazwa koonwabo: "Ukuxhatshazwa kwezesondo ngokunyanisekileyo. "(2018)
- Umlingo woTywala / wesondo? Eli phepha liluhlu Izifundo ze-39 ze-neuroscience (I-MRI, i-FMRI, i-EEG, i-neuropsychological, i-hormonal). Banikela ngenkxaso enamandla kwimodeli yoxilongo njengoko iziphumo zabo zibonakalisa iziphumo zeengqondo ezichazwe kwizifundo zokuxhatshaliswa kweziyobisi.
- Iingcamango zangempela zeengcali zoononongo / isondo? Olu luhlu luqulethe 16 Ukuphononongwa koncwadi kwangoku kunye neenkcazo ngenye yezinzulu zenzululwazi kwihlabathi. Yonke inkxaso ngenkxaso yomzobo.
- Iimpawu zokuxhatshazwa kunye nokunyuka kwamanqaku angaphezulu? Ngaphezulu kwezifundo ze-30 zokunika ingxelo ezifunyenweyo ezihambelana nokwanda kokusetyenziswa kwe-porn (ukunyamezelana), ukuhlala kwi-porn, kunye neempawu zokurhoxa (zonke iimpawu kunye neempawu ezinxulumene nomlutha).
- Ukuxubusha ingongoma engathethiweyo yokuthetha "inqweno yesini ephakamileyo" ichaza ukuxhatshazwa koonobumba okanye ukuxhatshazwa ngokwesini: Ubuncinci izifundo ze-25 zikhohlisa ibango lokuba isini kunye neziyobisi ezingamanyala "banomnqweno ophezulu wesondo"
- Iiduna kunye neengxaki zesondo? Olu luhlu luqukethe izifundo ze-26 ezidibanisa ukusetyenziswa koonwabo / ukuxhatshazwa koononophelo kwiingxaki zesini kunye nokwenyuka kokunciphisa isisombululo sezesondo. I fIzifundo ze-5 ziluhlu lubonisa bangela, njengabathathi-nxaxheba baqhelise ukusetyenziswa koononophelo kunye nokuphulukisa izifo ezingasinikiyo zesondo.
- Imiphumo yeSigxina kwimibutho? Izifundo eziphantse ze-60 zidibanisa ukusetyenziswa koononophelo ukuya kwisini esincinci kunye nolwaneliseko lobuhlobo. (Ngokuba sifuna zonke Izifundo ezibandakanya abesilisa ziye zaxela ukusetyenziswa koononophelo olunxulumene nalo zihlwempu zesini okanye ukwaneliseka kobudlelwane.)
- Ukusetyenziswa koonobumba kunokuchaphazela impilo yengqondo nengqondo? Ngaphezulu kwezifundo ze-55 ezinxibelelanisa ukusetyenziswa kwe-porn nakwimpilo yengqondo-yeemvakalelo kunye neziphumo ezibi zokuqonda.
- Ukusetyenziswa koonobumba kunokuchaphazela iinkolelo, iingcinga kunye nokuziphatha? Hlola uphando lomntu ngamnye Izifundo ze-25 zidibanisa ukusetyenziswa koononophelo "kwiingcamango ezingafaniyo" malunga nabasetyhini kunye neengcamango zesondo - okanye isishwankathelo kule mvavanyo-meta ye-2016: Imidiya kunye nokuSondo: I-State of Research Empirical, 1995-2015.
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