intshayelelo
Ndazalelwa kwi1998. Ndiqale ukudlala imidlalo yevidiyo ndineminyaka eyi-3. Ndichithe uninzi lwam kwiminyaka yobuntwana bam nakwishumi elivisayo ndidlala imidlalo yevidiyo. Ndifumanise ukufota xa ndandineminyaka eyi-7. Bendihlala ndiyenza rhoqo, kwaye emva kwethuba elithile yaba yinto iyadika. Emva koko ndafumanisa i-porn kwinqanaba le-12. Ndakhawuleza ndangumlutha wayo kwaye ndineminyaka eyi-20 ngoku. Ukuqukumbela, ndibengumlutha ubomi bam bonke.
Umlingo woTywala
Ukuqala kwam ukubukela i-porn, ukusebenza kwam esikolweni kwaqala ukwehla. Andinabahlobo. Ndandihlala ndikhetha ukuya ekhaya kwaye ndijerk off ndiye ndidlale imidlalo yevidiyo imini yonke kunokuba ndirhalela ukuhlangana noontanga bam. Besendiqala ukonqena namandla. Ubunzima bam bufikelele kwi-126 kgs ngexesha le-18 ngelixa ndandikwisikolo esiphakathi. (Ubude be185 cm)
Yonke imihla emva kwesikolo ndandiye ekhaya ndilale iiyure ze-3-4 kuba andikhange ndilale ngokwaneleyo kubusuku bangaphambili, ndiye ndadlala imidlalo yevidiyo. Ndiye ndahlala pha ndade ndafika u2-4 am, jerked to porn, ndaye ndalala ke ndade ndafika i alarm yam iright e7 am. Esikolweni andikhange ndithethe namntu imini yonke, ngaphandle kwamagama ambalwa kumntu owayehleli ecaleni kwam. Ndaye ndagoduka ndaphinda umjikelo. Ndabiwa bubuthongo kakhulu kwaye ndade ndalala kakhulu emini. Andikwazanga ukujongisisa kwaye andikwazi ukucinga. Kwaye ndilungile ngayo yonke lento. Khange ndicinge ukuba ikhona ingxaki ngayo. Ndiphinde nje inkqubo efanayo yonke imihla.
NoFap
Ndiqala ukuva nge-nofap xa ndikwiholide kaJuni 2017. I kakhulu umlutha we-porn ngeli xesha nangona ngexesha lokudibana kwam kweminyaka eyi-7 kunye ne-porn ayikaze ivele kum ukuba le nto inokuba likhoboka. Lo mkhwa wawungene ngaphakathi kum kwaye andizange ndibenayo nengcinga enye engalunganga nge-porn. Andinanjongo yakwenza nantoni na. Ndandingafuni ukuba kwanto. Andina buhlobo. Andikhathalelanga usapho lwam. Bendiyekelele ubhuti wam. Ndikhathalele kuphela i-dopamine elandelayo eyifumene nge-porn kangangokuba yandinika. Izinto endizikhethayo zazinzima kakhulu kwaye ndibukele ezinye shit. Andizukuya kwiinkcukacha, kodwa emva kwalo lonke eli xesha, ndisaziva ndinetyala kwaye ndineentloni ngezi vidiyo. Ndisenazo i-flashbacks. Ndinqwenela ukuba khange. Ndinqwenela ukuba ndibuyele ngexesha kwaye ndithethe nomntu wam oneminyaka eyi-12 ukuba ndimxelele apho ucofa khona kwindawo yokuqala ye-porn yobomi bakhe esiya kumkhokelela.
Okokuqala ndihambe ngaphandle kwe-porn kwiintsuku ze-2 kwaye sele ndiziva ndinyanzelekile kwaye intloko yam icacile. Ke ndiye ndalibala ngeNoFap iinyanga ezimbalwa kwaye ndiqhubeka nomkhwa wam. Ndizamile i-NoFap kwakhona ngoDisemba 2017. Emva konxweme ezimbalwa zobude obahlukeneyo (iintsuku ze-60, iintsuku ze-120, iintsuku ze-20, amaxesha amaninzi eentsuku ze-0-10 njl njl.) Okwangoku ngemini ye-53 ye-NoFap. Ndiyakholelwa ukuba eli lixesha lokuba ndiyeke ukuphulula amalungu esini kunye ne-porn ngonaphakade. Le yeyona njongo iphambili, kodwa ndiyithatha ngosuku lwe-1 ngexesha.
iziphumo
Kwiinyanga ezidlulileyo ze-14 ndenze inkqubela phambili. Kodwa kusekho iingxaki ezininzi ekufuneka zilungisiwe, uhambo lwam lweNofap lude kakhulu. Kuya kufuneka ndihlale ndomelele kakhulu kwiinyanga ezizayo.
Iziphumo zam ukuza kuthi ga ngoku: Ndiqalile ukuya ejimini kwaye ndilahlekelwe yi-40kgs. Ukusuka kwi-126kgs ndaya kwi-84kgs emva koko ndenyuka ndaya kwi-97 ngoqeqesho lwesisindo.
- Amachaphaza amkile.
- Izikhwama zamehlo zihambile.
- Ndolukile ngenxa ye-phimosis. Ukungasebenzi kwe-erectile akusekho.
- Ndicamngca mihla le.
- Ndonwabe ngakumbi.
- Uxinzelelo phantse luphelile.
- Andinaxhala kangako kwezentlalo kwaye ndinexhala kakhulu.
- Ndindwendwela iherapist veki nganye.
- Ndine-diagnostic esemthethweni yesifo sika-Asperger kwaye ndiza kuya kuvavanyo lwe-ADHD kulo nyaka kuba ndinolwazelelelo lokuba ndine-ADHD ngenxa yezizathu ezahlukeneyo. Ndizama ukuphucula izakhono zam zentlalo okokuqala ebomini bam.
- Ulwalamano lwam nosapho lwam lungcono kunangaphambili.
Ndiya eyunivesithi kwaye ndenza idiploma. Ndisebenza amaxesha ambalwa veki nganye. Ndifunda iincwadi zokuziphucula.
Ukuba ufundile ukuza kuthi ga ngoku, enkosi ngokumamela ibali lam. Nantsi imifanekiso emibini yendlela ebendijongeka ngayo ngaphambi kweNoFap kunye nendlela endikhangeleka ngayo ngoku.
Ngaphambi: https://imgur.com/ZPEVSj1
Emva: https://imgur.com/1AuxIyB
I-Nofap ayisiyipilisi yomlingo kodwa ikunika uninzi lokunyanzeleka ukuba usebenze ngokwakho kwaye ulungise iingxaki zakho. Enkosi ngosinaka ixehsa lakho! Ubenosuku olumnandi kakhulu! Ndonwabile ukuphendula nayiphi na imibuzo.
LINK - Iinyanga ze-14 zeNoFap -Ibali lam kunye neziphumo
by I-DrogCarter
;