Isihloko sisandi kancinci? Ndiyazi ukuba iyenzeka kwaye kukho amabali aliqela kwi-intanethi ngendlela ukucamngca okubancede ngayo abantu ukuba baphume kuzo zonke iintlobo zokulutha emhlabeni kwaye ibali lam linokuba yenye yezo zinto kodwa umlutha apha yi-p * rn kunjalo-ke bendicinga ukuba ndiza kwabelana ngebali lam.
Andizukubaxa ukuba ndithe bendiyinto egqwethekileyo kwaye ndenza izinto kwi-Intanethi ebekungafanelekanga ukuba ndinazo kwaye Igqityiwe i-p * rn kubungakanani bemizi-mveliso. Ilizwe lam lefantasy lalidibene nazo zonke iintlobo zezinto ezimbi apho. Ndayidla i-porno ngaphezulu kweminyaka ye-13 kwaye yayiqhelekile rhoqo. Ndiziva ndibuhlungu malunga nexesha endilichithileyo kodwa ndiziva ndibuhlungu nangakumbi ngezinto endizenzileyo kwi-intanethi 'kumaqabane' engxoxo. Ndiyindoda etshatileyo kwaye umfazi wam akazi ngale nto. Ngokuqinisekileyo ungoyena mfazi umangalisayo ndimaziyo kwaye ndamxokisa kakhulu ngaphambili ngenxa yomlutha wam. Ndizamile amatyeli aliqela ukuyeka kodwa bendisoloko ndisilela kwaye kwiinyanga ezintandathu ezidlulileyo oku kuye kwandenza ndakhathazeka ngobomi bam bothando (nomfazi) kunye nomsebenzi wam ngenxa yokuba ndichitha ixesha elininzi kwi-intanethi kwi-p * rn.
NgoJuni 2019, ndaya kwikhosi ye-10 yoSuku lokucamngca iVipassana. Le yayiyikhosi yam yesibini yeentsuku ezili-10 btw kwaye eyokuqala ayindincedanga kangako ngokuyeka i-p * rn. I-TBH andizange ndizimisele ngokuyeka xa ndenza ikhosi yam yokuqala. Umnqweno wokuyeka i-p * rn wawukho ngokuqinisekileyo kwikhosi yesibini. Kukho amanqaku amaninzi kwi-intanethi malunga nokucamngca ngoko andiyi kungena kwiinkcukacha ezingaphezulu.
Emva kwekhosi yeentsuku ze-10 ndibuyele ekhaya kwaye ndenza inqaku lokuziqhelanisa nokuCamngca kweVipassana iiyure ezimbini mihla le - kwakunzima ekuqaleni kodwa ngoku ndiyakwazi ukuyenza. Ngexesha lokufunda, utitshala wathi:
"Umlutha uthatha isiyobisi kuba unqwenela ukuziva ulonwabo olwenziwayo liyeza kuye, nangona esazi ukuba ngokuthatha iyeza uyabomeleza." Ngenxa yoko ukucamngca ndafunda:
- Ukwazi ukuthanda kwam i-p * rn kwaye ungaphenduli kuyo-ke akusekho thuba lokuphinda ubuye
- Ungayijonga njani le mvakalelo kwaye uqeqeshe ingqondo yam ukuba ingaphenduli
- Qaphela okubangela kwaye ungasabeli kubo
Le ibiyindlela yokuphumelela kum. Kwakungeyomfuneko ukuba ndibaleke ndiye kuthi ngaphakathi “Ndiyindoda eyomeleleyo” kuba oko kuphela kwinqanaba lokuqonda, ke ngoko kunokwenzeka ukubuyela umva. Kwimeko yam - bendiqeqesha ingqondo engacacanga (ngokucamngca mihla le) ukuze ndingasabeli kwiminqweno okanye kwizinto ezibangela ukuba ndenze njalo. Uninzi lweenyanga ezimbini ezidlulileyo-bendisekhaya (ndedwa), ndinesantya esiphezulu kwi-intanethi kwaye lonke ufikelelo kwi-p * rn bendisoloko ndinalo kodwa ngoku akukho kubuya mva.
Kwimeko apho oku kunomdla okanye kukhuthaza nabani na, zive ukhululekile ukunxibelelana kwaye singancokola. Ndikunqwenelela okuhle kodwa.
Yonwaba.
LINK - Ndisebenzise njani ukucamngca ukuyeka ubukhoboka bam…
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