Ndikhoyo 100 iintsuku kumzamo wam wokubuyisela / ukuqalisa kwakhona, ngaphandle kwe-P, PMO, MO, kunye ne-p-subs encinci okanye i-edging. Ndikhe ndabetha imitsi emide ngaphambili ngokunjalo.
Ngawaphi amacebiso endinokunika abanye ukubanceda baphumelele ngakumbi kuhambo lwabo?
Umgaqo ngamnye wale migaqo undincedile kwiinzame zam ezinempumelelo zokuchacha. Kwaye oku kufuneka kucingwe kulo mxholo ulandelayo:
Isiyobisi: i-trigger/cue> bongoza + impendulo ephindaphindayo = umkhwa onamandla/umlutha.
Inkululeko: i-trigger / cue> khuthaza + ukuphindaphinda ukungaphenduli, okanye impendulo eyahlukileyo = utshintsho lomkhwa.
I-16 Imigaqo yokuPhinda
1. Sukuphola ngokungapheliyo, okanye ube yi-serial-relapser.
Sifuna ukuyiphepha ukuchacha ukusuka kwizifo-iimodeli zokulutha (iimodeli zeentlobo ze-12-Inyathelo). Zibone uphilile, okanye uchacha. Yiba nesiphelo-njongo engqondweni, ukuba ubomi buya kuba njani ngaphandle kwalo mkhwa.
Kwakhona, ukuba awukwazi ukufikelela kuluhlu olude, vavanya ukuba isicwangciso sakho siyasebenza, okanye inqanaba lokuzibophelela.
Qaphela: ukuba i-12-Inyathelo uhlobo lwamaqela okanye ukubuyisela kuyakunceda, andiyi kunkqonkqoza!
2. Uzazisa njani?
Ngaba 'ulikhoboka'? Ngaba ungumsebenzisi wephonografi? Sisenokuba nokukhobokisa, nokuba asilokhoboka. Oku akufani kwi AA, apho kanye ikhoboka lotywala lihlala linxila, nangona ungazange wachukumisa ithontsi kwiminyaka!
Qala ukuthi, ndiyindoda (okanye umfazi) ongasebenzisi imifanekiso engamanyala, i-masturbate, okanye inkanuko.
3. Imfihlelo yokubuyela umva ngokukhawuleza emva kokuphelelwa yisikhathi:
Ukubona unobangela wokungaphumeleli njengakho konke okuvela ngaphakathi kuwe. Musa ukubeka ityala kwiimeko zangaphandle, izinto ezibangela, okanye uxinzelelo. Ngokukhawuleza uyibona le nto, ngokukhawuleza uya kubuyela umva, kwaye amaxesha ambalwa uya kubuya.
4. Kuphephe ukutsala nzima ngenqindi emhlophe ngokungacingi ngako.
Ukunikela ingqalelo kudla ngokutyhila injongo. Nokuba ucinga “ngokuchacha kwakho” ngalo lonke ixesha, usacinga ngako. Nje ukuba ubeke iinjongo zakho (imihla ngemihla), ungakhathali.
5. Sebenzisa ingqondo ekuziqeqesheni ukugxotha iminqweno.
Xa izibongozo zifika, zilumkele njengombukeli wangaphandle, ngaphandle kokugweba. Lumkela ukubetha kwentliziyo yakho, ukubetha kwentliziyo yakho, ukuba ukuphefumla akunzulu, kwaye xa oku kuthomalalisa. Gxininisa ekuphefumleni nzulu, de kudlule umnqweno. Phinda oku kungasentla kuyo nayiphi na iminqweno ebuyayo.
6. Ukuncoma ubuhle ayiyonkanuko, yazi umahluko.
Ukuba inzwakazi inkazana yazi; Ilungile. Emva koko, musa ukugxila kuyo. Sukuzixakekisa ngayo. Uyalawula ngoku, hayi inja ezama ukufunxa iimpundu zezinye izinja! Qinisekisa ukuba i-drive yakho yokukhanukela esidlangalaleni ixhala, okanye ukusuka kwimfuno enzulu yeemvakalelo.
7. Hlela kwakhona 'izitshizi' njengezikhokelo.
Ingqikelelo 'yezixhokonxa' ayixhobisi. Inika amandla amaninzi kakhulu kwiimeko zangaphandle, imeko yeemvakalelo, okanye umonzakalo wangaphambili. Iimpawu zahlukile, njengokuba sisivuseleli esingaphandle esisikhumbuza umkhwa wethu. Bafana nokukhala kwentsimbi, kwaye inja kaPavlov iyavuza ngenxa yoko. Oku kungokwemvelo, kwaye izibongozo azinamandla okukwenza ukuba wenze nantoni na. Uhlala ulawula, kungekhona umkhwa, xa siqaphela oku.
8. Zazi, ngaba iminqweno yakho ingumkhwa, okanye isuka kwindawo enzulu yeemvakalelo/yomoya?
Ngamanye amaxesha siye sijonge impendulo yesiqhelo, kwaye sinokuyikhaba lula ngokwaneleyo. Ngamanye amaxesha, i-cue ivela kwimfuno enzulu yeemvakalelo. Ngaba sinokuyivavanya le nto ngathi?
Ukuba sifumanisa ukuba loo minqweno isuka entliziyweni, ngokomoya okanye ngokweemvakalelo, yintoni esinokuyenza? Ukuba ungumntu womoya, unokuthandaza kunye/okanye ucamngce, okanye ufikelele kwaye uqhagamshelane nabantu obathandayo.
9. Apho kunokwenzeka, sebenzisa iqabane ukuze uthobe iminqweno enamandla.
Akukho nto iphosakeleyo okanye ingozi eyenziwayo ukuba xa ujongene neminqweno enamandla, uphendukela kumfazi wakho kwaye usebenze kunye naye. Ungoyiki 'isiphumo sokugxotha', njengoko uphinda ujongana nesondo 'lokwenyani'.
Jongana nezibongozo 'zokuleqa' njengoko kuchaziwe ngasentla, ngengqondo.
10. Fumanisa laa ndawo imnandi phakathi kwezikhokelo kunye neempendulo.
"Phakathi kovuselelo kunye nokuphendula kukho indawo. Kweso sithuba sinamandla okukhetha impendulo yethu. Kwimpendulo yethu kukukhula kwethu kunye nenkululeko yethu. "
- UViktor E. Frankl
11. Qeqesha ukuya emvuzweni olibaziseke kunye nonyamezelo olukhulu.
Abanye bathatha iishawa ezibandayo (hayi mna!), Abanye balinda ngaphambi kokuvula i-app abanezaziso kuyo. Ukuzila ukutya okwethutyana, nako, kuyanceda ukuziqeqesha.
Oku kunceda ukwakha unyamezelo xa kubalwa ngexesha xa kuvela izibongozo, sinokwenza ukhetho olungcono ekuzigxotheni.
12. Indlela yokusebenzisa iinjongo ezisebenzayo kuwe.
Ukuzibekela usukelo olude kuyathandeka, kwaye kuyanqweneleka, iintsuku ezingama-90, iintsuku ezingama-120, unyaka… Kodwa usukelo lusenokubonakala lungenakoyiswa, okanye lungenakwenzeka kuthi. Gcina usukelo olude, kodwa ulwahlule lube ngamanqaku amancinci. Umzekelo, injongo yam ye 120 iintsuku zahlula kwiiseti ezili-15 zeenjongo zeentsuku ezisi-8.
Kule vein, yazi ukuba yintoni ukusetha kwakhona kuwe. Sukulalanisa kule nto, kwaye uya kuba nokungayekeleli ukuqalisa ngokutsha/ukubuyisela kwakhona.
13. Yomeleza kwaye ugxininise kwakhona inkuthazo kunye nokusombulula.
Ngaba ungazijonga emehlweni? Ngaba ungazibamba ngomqala (ngokungagwebi)? Ngaba unakho ukuzimisela kwenja efileyo?
Yiloo nto eza kuthatha ukwahlukana nalo mkhwa, kwaye oku kufuneka kugcinwe rhoqo. Ukuba uzibona ubeka esichengeni (P-subs, edging), phinda ugxininise.
Abanye babhala uludwe lweengenelo zokuyeka, nemiphumo yokungaphumeleli.
14. Ukunika nokufumana inkxaso.
Musa ukoyika ukufikelela kwabanye kwiijenali zabo kwaye unike inkxaso. Kwanokuba imigudu yakho ayigqibelelanga, awukwazi ukuba ngubani osenokufuna ukhuthazo.
Ukuba uyasokola, kwaye abanye banikezela ngenkxaso- funda ukuyamkela kwindawo oyinikiweyo. Abanye banobuntu obuqinileyo, okanye bayaphumelela, kwaye ke baphume kancinci. Kunokuba ulugatye uncedo lwabo, ngaba amazwi abo aqatha anokukukhuthaza?
Kodwa ukuba imvakalelo embi, ngathi bayageqa, ungasoloko ubavimba. Indlela yakho yeyakho yonke, indlela yakho iya kwahluka kwabanye, kwaye sonke silapha ukuze sixhasane.
15. Guqula ukuba i-porn ithetha ntoni kuwe.
Yintoni kwi-porn, i-masturbation okanye inkanuko esibuyisela umva, ngaphandle komkhwa? Ngaba siyibona njengokuhlangabezana nesidingo esinzulu okanye umba? Jonga i-P, i-PMO, kunye ne-MO ukuba yintoni, iphupha! Ekuphela kwento enokukunika yona yimizuzu embalwa yolonwabo, elandelwa yiminyaka yokuzisola, umtshato oqhawukileyo, kunye nenoodle eqhwalelayo.
16. Kujonge oku njengokutshintsha umkhwa olula, kwaye ungakunxulumanisi neemeko zakho zovakalelo, uxinzelelo, okanye ukwenzakala okudlulileyo.
Akunyanzelekanga ukuba uqale usombulule okwenzekileyo uneminyaka emihlanu ubudala, okanye ukhulule i-subconscious. Ungayifumana inkululeko ngoku. Sizisebenzele kulo mkhwa okanye umlutha ngezigqibo ezincinci, kwaye ngoku kufuneka sihambe ngendlela yethu ebuyayo.
Oku sikwenza ngokutshintsha imikhwa yethu, kwaye xa ezo zingasasinyanzeliyo, sinokusebenza kweminye imiba.
LINK - I-16 Imigaqo yokuPhinda
By UPineas 808
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