I-Coolidge Impact ingaxilisa iinjongo zethu ezilungileyo.
Imbalwa embalwa edlulileyo Abaphandi baseJamani babika ukuba njengoko ixesha lobambiswano lisanda, umnqweno wesini ngokubanzi uyehla kwabasetyhini-ngelixa umnqweno wokuthamba ngokubanzi uyehla emadodeni. Ngokwesiqhelo iqabane elinxungupheleyo (nokuba sesesini) ngokuqinisekileyo licinga ukuba lingonwaba ngokugqibeleleyo ukuba kuphela linokufumana isondo kangangoko lifuna. Yintoni eyayiza kumfaka kwimeko?
Enyanisweni, le meko yinto encinci kunene. Abaxhatshazo basuke bechasene nenkqubo engafanelekanga yokuvelisa i-genetic program, edla ngokubakhupha ngaphandle kokuvumelanisa ngesondo-nangaphezulu ukuya kumaqabane amveli.
Khawucinge ngoko kwenzekayo xa iinkunzi zeendoda zaziqhathaniswa ngokuphindaphindiweyo kunye namabhinqa athile (ahlala ehlala emoyeni, ngenxa yemijovo ye-hormone yemihla ngemihla). Izulu laseMonkey, kunjalo? Nope. Amadoda ikhutshwe ngaphantsi nangaphantsi, kunye nokunciphisa intshiseko, ngaphezu kweminyaka engama-3 nangesiqingatha seminyaka. Akunjalo kuphela, xa iveli yamabhinqa iboniswa, aba bantu bahamba ngokukhawuleza benza isenzo kunye nesantya sabo sokuqala.
Ngoko kwakuza kwenzeka ntoni ukuba iqabane lakho lihlala lisesimweni sengqondo? Amathuba amahle ukuba kungekudala a ngafuni … ubuncinane naye. Inyani elusizi kukuba ukuba iqabane lakho alinantlobano zesini kunye nawe rhoqo njengoko ungathanda, unokugcina umanyano lwakho ngokukuthintela ekuzihluthiseni ngokwesondo rhoqo. Le ayisiyonto ilungileyo, nangona kunjalo, kuba ngaphandle koqhakamshelwano lothando rhoqo, ubudlelwane bemvakalelo phakathi kwabantu abatshatileyo buthathaka, kwaye, ngelishwa, uninzi lwezibini ezitshatileyo zihamba ziye kulwalamano lothando kuphela xa uqhuba i-orgasm.
Indima yedopamine
Ukwanela ngokwesondo kunokuwahlula njani amaqabane? Xa oososayensi bejonga ubuchopho beempuku zokukhwelana, bafumanisa ukuba i-neurochemical ebizwa ngokuba yi-dopamine (into ethi "ndinayo!") Yayiyeyona nto ibangela ukudinwa kwamaqabane. Njengomlinganiso wokuziphatha ngokufuthi kunye neqabane elifanayo, kuncinci nangaphantsi kwe-dopamine ekhutshwa kwisekethe yomvuzo wobuchopho bayo.
Kodwa xa iqabane elinokubakho linokubonakala, i-dopamine inyuka kwakhona. Ukhawuleza ube kwimeko. Yindlela efanayo ebangela ukuba uthi "ewe" kwiswidi, idizethi enamafutha nokuba ugcwele iturkey kunye neetapile ezicujiweyo. Ukutsalwa kwe-Dopamine kwisekethe yakho yomvuzo kunokugqitha iimvakalelo zakho zokungakhathali, nokuba ingqondo yakho enengqondo inokucinga ntoni ngokutya kakhulu okanye ukungathembeki. Ukunyuka kwedopamine ngu "ewe!" Ngelixa i-dopamine ephantsi "ayininzi kangako." Njengoko siza kubona kwisithuba esizayo, i-dopamine nayo yehla ngokwemvelo emva kwe-orgasm, edlala kanye kule nto. Imfuza yethu inokuba ngoonodoli abangenantliziyo.
Izazinzulu zibiza umnqweno wokukhathala umlingane onokuzithoba ngesondo, ngelixa usebenza ngokukhawuleza ukuba wenze entsha, Impembelelo yeCoolidge. Bayiqaphele le nkcazo ngokubanzi phakathi kwezilwanyana, kuquka amabhinqa. Amanye amabhinqa amabhinqa, umznabalingani abangaqhelekanga kunokuba kunezo esele zikhutshiwe. Ngokuhambelana nale nto, xa abantu abatshatileyo beqhawula umtshato kuba ubomi babo bokwabelana ngesondo buphumile ekuvumelaneni, iqabane ebelingenamdla lihlala lithuswa libido evuthayo xa umthandi omtsha engena emfanekisweni. Ngoku lo mfazi uyamfuna engamashumi amabini anesithathu indoda.
Impembelelo yeCoolidge
Nabo abangenawo amaqabane oqobo bafumana i-Coolidge Impact emva kokuxhatshazwa ngokwesondo:
Ndibukele i-documentary yabafana ababiza kakhulu kwaye banokwenene "onodoli bothando." Omnye umntu wayeneeshumi labo. Wayenezinto ezininzi kangangokuba wayephuma egumbini lakhe. Nangona ezi bezinjalo idodoli, wayesele eqale ukubabona njengamantombazana awayechithe ixesha elaneleyo kunye nawo kwaye ngoku wayekulungele amathuba amatsha (obuxoki). Mhlawumbi kutheni abantu beqokelela iphonografi kangako… sicinga ukuba siyifumene eyona iphonografi ngalo lonke ixesha kodwa emva kokuyibona izihlandlo ezimbalwa asikaze sibuyele umva. Ndineetoni zemifanekiso ye-jpeg endiyiqokeleleyo, ndicinga ukuba ndiqokelela kwindawo yolonwabo. Kodwa andikhumbuli ndibuyela kubo kwakhona. Inxalenye enyanzelekileyo ngumfanekiso omtsha, umfanekiso wenoveli, okanye mhlawumbi, unodoli wothando wenoveli.
Kutheni i-biology ibangela ukuba iqabane eliqhelekileyo libheke ngakumbi kwaye lifana nezihluma zaseBrussels kunye nelo elitsha likhangele ngathi lifana ne-chocolate mousse ecebileyo? Ngako-ke ininzi inzala eneentlobo ezahlukeneyo zezofuzo eziveliswayo (ngokubanzi kwimida yabantu). Izaziso zakho zikhetha ukuhamba ngexesha elizayo kwiinqanawa ezininzi njengoko ziyakwazi ukugubha. I-Monogamy inobungozi nje ngokubeka onke amaqanda kwinqwelo elinye.
Ukubhanqa izibini
Ufuna ubungqina? Hayi izilwanyana zincinci (ngokwemvo yokuba ngokwesondo), kunye neepesenti ezintathu kuphela ukukhathazeka ngokubambisana. Ezi zimbini ezihlanganisayo (kuquka abantu) ziyaziwa nentsapho. Bakha ngokukhawuleza ukuba baqhotyoshelise ixesha elide kwaye bavame ukuphakamisa inzala yabo ndawonye, nangona bafumana unxongo lokukhohlisa ngokubulela kwiConlidge Effect.
Imizila yethu yemfuza ifuna ukuba siqale phambili ngamathuba emfuza athembisayo nokuba sizibeka emngciphekweni wokungaphili “ngokonwaba.” Nokuba amaqabane ayakwazi ukuhlala ethembekile, ukungoneliseki okubangelwa yimithambo-luvo kunokubenza babonane ngandlel 'ithile njengomnye okhonza i "Hamburger Helper." Ngokuqinisekileyo, uphando lubonisa ukuba amaqabane athambekele ekufumaneni zibacaphukisa xa sele batshatile. (Isiphumo seCoolidge siyabonakala ngakumbi emva kokuba abathandi be-booster yokuqala ye-honeymoon neurochemistry iphelile, ke abathandi abatsha bakholelwa ukuba bakhuselekile -njengabantu abangenalo uthando olwaneleyo.)
Ukuvuselela okungeyonyani
Abanye abantu abatshatileyo bayamelana nale nkqubo yamandulo yokunyanzela ngokwenza i-dopamine basebenzise iphonografi okanye benze ukuthanda ezesondo kunye namaqabane abo ukuze benze 'imo elungileyo'. Kuzo zombini iimeko, bazama ukukhohlisa ingqondo ukuba ithuba elitsha lokutshatisa lifikile. Abanye baphakamisa i-dopamine yabo ngokwenza iimvakalelo ezinamandla (njengasebukhobokeni), okanye ngokutshintsha amaqabane. Nangona kunjalo, kunokuba nzima ukuba ulungelelanise i-dopamine surge ngalo lonke ixesha ufuna ukwenza uthando. Kwaye kwenzeka ntoni xa elinye iqabane lifuna "ukulungiswa" kwemincili yesini kwaye elinye lingakulungelanga ukutyala imali engaka, okanye ukuqhuba umngcipheko ocetywayo, ukufumana ulonwabo?
Ngaba sigwetyelwe ukuvumela ibhayoloji isenze singazoli? Kwizithuba ezizayo siza kujonga ukhetho lokuba iinkcubeko ezahlukeneyo kwimbali ziqeshiwe: indlela yokwenza uthando enceda ukuyeka ukuhlala. Isekwe kwimbono yokuba ukomeleza umnqweno wethu wesini rhoqo ukukhawulezisa isiphumo seCoolidge ngokusimisela kwimibuzo ephindaphindayo yokunyuka kwedopamine yokulwa nexesha le-dopamine ephantsi eyenzeka ngokwendalo emva kwesini. Oku kusinqanda singene kwimeko.
Xa amanqanaba e-dopamine engangxoli ngokujikeleza okuphezulu nangaphezulu, ulonwabo olufihlakeleyo lunokubhalisa njengolonwabisayo ngokumangalisayo- kwaye amaqabane athambekele ekugcineni ukubengezela kwawo. Ke, ukuba Iziphumo zeCoolidge zingena kumanyano lwakho, ungothuki. Unokukhetha ongakhange uziqwalasele.
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