Zovuta Kwambiri pa Intaneti: Zotsatira za SADD
Ndi Ian Kerner
Kupeza zovuta zolaula pa intaneti komanso zachikhalidwe zambiri zomwe zilipo zakhudza anthu ambiri omwe sangakhale ndi vuto.
Monga katswiri wothandiza anthu pa nkhani ya kugonana komanso woyambitsa Good in Bed , ndaona kuwonjezeka kwakukulu kwa amuna omwe ali ndi matenda atsopano omwe ndawatcha kuti "Sexual Attention Deficit Disorder," kapena SADD. Ndipo gwero la vutoli ndi kungodina pang'ono - zolaula zambiri pa intaneti.
Monga momwe anthu omwe ali ndi ADD amasokonezedwa mosavuta, anyamata omwe ali ndi SADD azolowera kwambiri zinthu zatsopano komanso zolimbikitsa zomwe zimachokera ku zolaula za pa intaneti kotero kuti sangathe kuyang'ana kwambiri kugonana kwenikweni ndi mkazi weniweni. Zotsatira zake, anyamata omwe ali ndi SADD nthawi zambiri amavutika kusunga mbewa panthawi yogonana, kapena amakumana ndi vuto lochedwa kutulutsa umuna ndipo amatha kutha pokhapokha ngati akulimbikitsidwa ndi manja kapena pakamwa.
Kulimbitsa thupi?
Amuna omwe ali ndi SADD nthawi zambiri amavutika kapena kuleza mtima akamagonana. Angakhale ndi chilakolako cha thupi komanso kudzuka, koma samakhala ndi chilakolako cha maganizo. Amuna omwe ali ndi SADD nawonso sakhala ndi chilakolako chogonana chifukwa chakuti atopa ndi maliseche . Sakuthamanga mokwanira, mwakuthupi kapena m'maganizo.
Ndikukhulupirira kapena ayi, ndinayamba kuzindikira za SADD kudzera pa zodandaula za amayi omwe ankadabwa chifukwa chake anyamata awo sakanatha kutero (ndipo nthawi zambiri ankangowonongeka) kapena omwe anawona kuti anzawo akuoneka kuti atayika kapena osakhudzidwa panthawi yogonana. Pamene ndinakumba pang'ono, kapena ndinkalankhula ndi anyamata okha, ndinazindikira kuti amunawa amakhala ndi maliseche kuposa nthawi zambiri chifukwa chosowa zolaula pa intaneti. Nthawi zina, iwo anali ndi maliseche mofanana ndi nthawi zonse, koma sanadziwe kuti nthawi yawo yowonongeka - nthawi yowonongeka pakati pa zolaula - ikukula pamene ali okalamba.
Musandiyese cholakwika, ndine wotchuka kwambiri wotsutsa maliseche. Zimathandiza mnyamata kumenyana ndi nthunzi ndipo ali ngati tsiku la 30-spa tsiku. Koma zovuta zolaula pa intaneti ndi zachikhalidwe zambiri zomwe zilipo zakhudza anthu ambiri omwe sangakhale ndi vuto. Chifukwa cha ichi, amunawa adabweretsanso ubongo wawo pofuna kukhutira panthawi yomweyo zolaula zowononga zolaula. Izi zikutanthauza kuti akukulitsa zomwe akuzitcha kuti chikhalidwe chodziwika bwino: Amadzizoloŵera ku mtundu wolimbikitsana womwe sungaganizidwe pa nthawi yogonana. Chikhalidwe chawo chokhudzana ndi kugonana kwa abwenzi awo ndi otsika, ndipo amafunika kuganiza mozama pa nthawi yogonana kuti apitirize kukwanira.
Mukuganiza kuti mukudwala SADD? Nazi zomwe muyenera kuchita…
Kodi mwamuna ndi SADD ayenera kuchita chiyani?
Choyamba, dzipatseni nthawi yopumula yodziseweretsa maliseche . Sungani mojo yanu kwa mnzanu. Ngati simuli pabanja, chepetsani kuchuluka kwa maliseche omwe mumachita. Mukachita maliseche, yesani kugwiritsa ntchito dzanja lanu losalamulira. Mwachitsanzo, ngati ndinu wamanja, dzikhudzeni ndi dzanja lanu lamanzere. Simungathe kugwiritsa ntchito mphamvu zofanana ndi zomwe mungathe ndi dzanja lanu lolamulira, kotero simudzakhala ndi nkhawa kwambiri ndi zomwe zimachitika pogonana.
Chachiwiri, siyani zolaula . Mukaseweretsa maliseche, gwiritsani ntchito nzeru zanu kupanga zithunzizo ndikuyesera kukumbukira zochitika za kugonana. Ganizirani izi ngati kusiyana pakati pa kuwerenga ndi kuonera TV. Gwiritsani ntchito mwayi uwu kuti mulumikizanenso ndi mbiri yanu yokhudza kugonana komanso mndandanda wanu wa zokumbukira zosangalatsa.
Wonjezerani luso lanu la maganizo ndi mnzanu: Gawani maloto ndikuyesera kuchita sewero. Musanagonane, pitani pamalo pomwe muli pachiwopsezo chachikulu chakuthupi ndi m'maganizo. SADD sikuyenera kukhala wachisoni chifukwa cha inu kapena mnzanu. Chokani pa kompyuta yanu kupita kuchipinda chanu chogona, ndipo mutha kuyika chidwi chanu kumbuyo komwe kuli koyenera - pa moyo wanu weniweni wa kugonana.
Ian Kerner, Ph.D, ndi mlangizi wa nkhani zogonana komanso wolemba mabuku ambiri ogulitsidwa kwambiri a The New York Times a Harper Collins, kuphatikizapo She Comes First . Iye ndiye woyambitsa GoodInBed.com ndipo posachedwapa analemba buku lotsogolera kuthana ndi vuto la kumwa umuna msanga.