Ana a ku Australia akupeza zithunzi zolaula mochuluka, ndipo kupezeka kwake mokonzeka kumakhala ndi mavuto aakulu - kuphatikizapo chikhalidwe chatsopano chakugonana.
Akatswiri achichepere omwe ali achinyamata monga 16 akukumana ndi zizindikiro za kuwonongeka kwa erectile chifukwa chowona kwambiri zachiwawa ndi zolaula, katswiri wina wavumbula.
Ndipo kukonzekera kuonera zolaula pazipangizo zonse nthawi iliyonse ya tsiku likuphunzitsa maphunziro owopsa pankhani za kugonana kwabwino kwabwino.
Katswiri wa zamaganizo komanso wolemba mabuku Collett Smith walemba buku latsopano lakuti They'll Be Okay , lomwe limafotokoza zomwe makolo ayenera kukambirana ndi ana awo.
Nkhani imodzi yovuta kwambiri yoti mukambirane ndi zolaula, zomwe Ms Smart adati ndi imodzi mwa nkhani zazikulu kwambiri zomwe mbadwo watsopano uyenera kuthana nazo.
"Zithunzi zimakhudza momwe amawonera maubwenzi, kugonana ndi chibwenzi pamaso pa ambiri a iwo ngakhale atayamba kumpsompsonana kapena kugwira dzanja la wina," adatero Smart.
Zolaula si zatsopano, koma kupezeka kwake kwasintha kuchoka pa magazini obisika ndi tepi yachilendo ya VHS kupita ku yachangu, yaulere komanso nthawi zonse . Ndipo zomwe zili mkati mwake zasintha, adatero.
"Vuto ndiloti zachiwawa zikuwonetsedwa mu zolaula. Ndangowerenga pepala latsopano lofufuzira za momwe ziwawa zimakhudzira maudindo achiwerewere omwe ali achinyamata - mavidiyo omwe amagwiritsa ntchito owonetsera kusewera achinyamata. Zambiri kuposa zokhudzana ndi zolaula.
"Achinyamata akuphunzira kuti ndizochita zachiwawa kuti azikhala achiwawa. Ndi nkhani yaikulu kwa m'badwo uno. "
Mayi Smart adalongosola zochitika zojambula zolaula monga "kugonana", zomwe zimatsutsana maganizo a achinyamata.
"Palibe chifundo, nthawi zambiri kumpsompsona chikondi, palibe kukoma mtima kapena kupempha, kapena kusamala za munthu winayo. Kufuna kupeza zomwe mukufuna ndi kutuluka. "
Ofufuza ndi akatswiri alemba kuchuluka kwa chiwerengero cha ana omwe amaonera zolaula, kuphatikizapo m'sukulu ya pulayimale.
Chidutswa cha zokondweretsa payekha, komanso chikhalidwe chachiwawa choposa icho, chimaimbidwa chifukwa cha kuwuka kwachonso, adatero.
Anyamata ndi atsikana ambiri amafotokoza za kugonana kwa abambo mu zochitika zogonana ndi amuna kapena akazi okhaokha, ndipo zonsezi zimawoneka ngati "zomwe zimachitika" ndi zachizoloŵezi.
"Iwo amayembekezera kuti izo zikhale zopweteka koma izo ndizozovomerezeka chabe - ziri ngati, zoipa, ndizo zomwe tiyenera kuchita," adatero Smart.
Mwachidziwitso, madokotala akuwona kuchuluka kwa atsikana omwe ali achinyamata omwe ali ndi "anal tears", adatero.
"Ndizovuta kwambiri," adatero Smart. "Palibe kukoma mtima kapena kukoma mtima."
Kuonera zolaula kumayambitsanso kuwonjezeka kwa chiwerengero cha anyamata m'zaka zingapo zopita kusukulu ya sekondale omwe alibe maganizo.
Mayi Smart adanena kuti ndi nkhani yovuta komanso maphunziro akudziwika bwino, koma alangizi a sukulu omwe amagwira ntchito nawo adati akuwona "mochulukirapo".
"Kupatula nthawi yochulukitsa zolaula kungayambitse zojambula zowonjezereka kapena zovuta zomwe zimafunikira kupeza msinkhu womwewo waukitsidwa omwe adachitapo," adatero Smart.
"Anyamata ambiri m'chaka 11 kapena 12 akubwera patsogolo ndi (zizindikiro za) mavuto a erectile olephera. Ena mwa anyamatawa sanakhalepo ndi chibwenzi choncho akamayesa kukhala okondana, saukitsidwa. Ili ndilo vuto lenileni. "
Nkhani yabwino ndi yakuti kafukufuku amasonyeza kuti achinyamata amatha kulankhula ndi amayi ndi abambo pa nkhaniyi ndipo angakonde kukambirana nawo kusiyana ndi anzawo, adatero.
"Kwa achinyamata asanakwane zaka khumi ndi ziwiri, ngati simunayambe mwakambiranapo, yambani tsopano. Zidzakhala zovuta kwambiri ndipo onse awiri adzasokoneza mpando. Zidzakhala ngati zokambirana zovuta kwambiri zomwe munayamba mwakhalapo. Koma izi ndi zabwino. Musataye mtima.
"Simuyenera kulowa muzokambirana za zolaula. Yankhulani za chikondi ndi chikondi ndi zopweteka. Onetsani mafilimu kapena akuwonetsa kuti akuyang'ana ndikuwafunsa za izo.
"Gwiritsani ntchito njira zawo zoyankhulirana kuti pang'onopang'ono ayambe kuchita zinthu zina zofunikira monga kugonana ndi zolaula."
Buku latsopano la Collett Smart lakuti They will Be OK likugulitsidwa tsopano