Tokyo (CNN)Ndili mwana, wosakwatiwa ku Japan mzaka za m'ma 1980, chuma chidali chotentha momwemonso momwe zimakhalira pachibwenzi. Atsikana ozizira sanachite manyazi kutaya unamwali wawo asanakwatirane.
Inde kwa ine ndekha, kutaya unamwali wanga unali chinthu chachikulu. Koma m'mabanja, sizinali zovuta. Anali a 80s, Japan anali wamoyo, ndipo moyo unali wabwino.
Ubwino, momwe nthawi zasinthira.
Ndizowopsa kwa ine, komanso anzanga ambiri, kuwona chidwi chokhudzana ndi kugonana komanso maubale omwe tidamvera tili achinyamata tidasinthidwa ndi mphwayi zakugonana zomwe zikuwoneka ku Japan lero.
Kafukufuku yemwe boma latulutsa sabata ino akuti pafupifupi 40% ya anthu aku Japan azaka za m'ma XNUMX ndi makumi atatu sali pachibwenzi saganiza kuti akusowa wokondana naye, pomwe ambiri amati maubale ndi "ovuta."
Kafukufuku wina wochokera ku 2010 adapeza kuti m'modzi mwa amuna anayi achi Japan omwe ali ndi zaka makumi atatu ndi zitatu omwe sanakwatiranepo ndi anamwali. Ziwerengerozo zinali zochepa pang'ono kwa azimayi.
Kusaganizira za kugonana
Kusalabadira zakugonana kumeneku ndi kovuta kwambiri ku Japan, komwe kuli anthu okalamba mwachangu kwambiri padziko lonse lapansi, zomwe zidadzetsa nkhawa kuti nzika sizidzabala ana okwanira kuti azikhala ndi chuma chokwanira mzaka zikubwerazi.
Sindinakhulupirire nditamva za kalasi yamaliseche yolimbikitsa kulimbikitsa anamwali azaka zapakati ku Japan.
Ndinaganiza, ngati mwamuna sanakhalepo ndi mtundu wina uliwonse wogonana pofika zaka makumi atatu kapena makumi anayi, kungosema mkazi wamaliseche kuli ngati kuponya dontho lamadzi pamoto wamnkhalango. Sizingathetse vutoli.
Koma kenako tidafunsa Takashi Sakai (tavomereza kusintha dzina lake), namwali wazaka 41 waku Japan yemwe akuti makalasiwa, omwe amaperekedwa kamodzi ku Tokyo ndi White Hands osachita phindu, ndiomwe adayandikira kwambiri weniweni, mkazi wamaliseche osati mtundu wina wosangalatsa wa manga achi Japan.
"Mukawona mkazi ndikumupeza wokongola, mutha kumufunsa, kumugwira dzanja, kumpsompsona ndipo ndi momwe zimachitikira," akutero Sakai.
“Koma kwa ine, sizidandichitikire. Ndimaganiza kuti zingachitike mwachilengedwe, koma sizinachitike. ”
Sindinayambe ndpsopsompsyona
Shingo Sakatsume - wodziyesa yekha "wothandizira kugonana" wogwira ntchito ndi White Manja - akuti anamwali azaka zapakati omwe angafune kuti zinthu zisinthe alibe zokumana nazo zenizeni ndi akazi, kuwalola kuti azikhala ndi nthawi yoyang'ana thupi lachikazi ndichinthu choyamba kuti athetse vutoli.
“M'dziko la Japan, tili ndi zosangalatsa zambiri kuposa chikondi ndi kugonana. Tili ndi makanema ojambula pamanja, otchuka, nthabwala, masewera ndi masewera, ”akutero.
"Chifukwa chiyani muyenera kusankha chikondi kapena kugonana m'malo mwa zinthu zina zosangalatsa zomwe sizingakupweteketseni?"
Chiwonongeko cha ubale wangwiro, kuphatikizapo mantha achi Japan chakulephera, chachititsa vuto lalikulu laumphawi, akuti.
Amadziwa kuti kuwonetsetsa kwawoneka kumayambitsa maubwenzi ocheperako, kulembetsa chiwerengero chochepa cha kubadwa, ndi kuchepa kwa chiwerengero cha anthu.
Maphunzirowa akuwoneka kuti akuthandiza Sakai, wokwera phiri ndi mphunzitsi yemwe, pa 41, sali namwali yekha, komanso sanakhalepo pachibwenzi kapena ngakhale atapsyopsyona.
Kwa zaka zambiri, wabisa unamwali wake chinsinsi kuchokera kwa abwenzi, ogwira nawo ntchito, komanso abale.
"Kusawuza ena (kuti sindinagonepo) kunali chimodzimodzi ngati kuti vuto palibe," akutero Sakai. Zinali ngati kuziyika pamashelefu pomwe palibe amene angazione. ”
Zithunzi zakale
Pamene ndikuwonera mwana wanga wamwamuna wazaka zisanu ndi chimodzi akukula, ndimaganiza nthawi zonse kuti Japan adzakhala nyumba yabwino.
Pofika 2060 atakhala msinkhu wanga, ngati zinthu zikupitilira, anthu aku Japan achepera kuposa 30%.
Anthu awiri kapena asanu adzakhala akulu kuposa 65. Kodi Japan idzatha kudzisamalira? Kodi moyo wake udzakhala wotani?
Maganizo a ku Japan pa kugonana ndi maubwenzi asintha kwambiri pa ntchito yanga ya 27.
Kubwerera mu chuma chambiri cha m'ma 1980, atsikana osakwatiwa opitilira 25 amatchedwa "Keke ya Khrisimasi" - tanthawuzo la chinthu chomwe mumataya nyengo ikatha.
M'zaka za m'ma 1990, lingaliroli linakhala "Zakudyazi kumapeto kwa chaka."
Ku Japan, timadya Zakudyera pa Chaka Chatsopano. Ngati samadyedwa ndi 31, amaponyedwanso kunja ngati makeke a Khrisimasi.
Masiku ano, ambiri amaseka pa clichés akale.
Zaka makumi awiri za kulemera kwachuma zikuwoneka kuti zatsogolera amuna ena achijapani, omwe sangayembekezere kupeza ntchito yomwe idzalipire mokwanira kuthandiza mkazi ndi ana.
“Chuma ndi chuma zimayenderana kwambiri ndi kudzidalira. Kulandila ndalama zochepa kumatanthauza kudzidalira, ”akutero a Sakatsume.
"Kudziona kuti ndiwe wotsika kumapangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kudzipereka pachibwenzi."
Sakai tsopano akugawana nkhani yake poyera m'makalasi a White Manja. Anatinso kuuza ena kumamuthandiza kuzindikira kuti sali yekha.
“Pali anthu ambiri omwe akukhala ngati kuti alibe chilakolako chogonana. Ndimamva ndekha kuti anthu oterewa akukwera mwakachetechete. "
Sakai akunena kuti akuyembekezerabe kuti adzalandira ubwino wake kuti akhale namwali koma ndifilosofi.
“Ndikumva bwino tsopano chifukwa ndikutha kulankhula za izi. Ndikulankhula za izi, ndazindikira kuti vuto langa silofunika kusintha, koma ndiyenera kuzindikira, ”akutero.
“Sindinataye mtima panobe.”