'Ndikaonerera zolaula, ndimadzimva kuti ndine wovuta. Ndikudziwa kuti ndikhoza kuchita bwino. '
Nthawi yoyamba Greg Anderson adawonera zolaula pa intaneti ali ndi zaka za 12, sanamve kanthu. Pamene wamisala wamaliseche akukangana ndi mwamuna wake yemwe adagwira naye ntchito, adakumbukira chifukwa chakuti chithunzicho chinali buku, osati chifukwa chinamupangitsa. Kwenikweni, izo zinapanga zosiyana - izo zinamupangitsa iye kuti aziyang'ana ndi kuyang'ana pa zowonekera apo, mokayikira, monga iye anali kuyang'ana bomba lazithunzithunzi pa siteji. Iye anati: "Nthawi yomweyo anamva zabodza komanso kusagwirizana. "Ndinkakonda kukhala ndi maganizo amenewa poona zithunzi zogwiritsira ntchito mapepala, kotero ndikuganiza kuti ndinayamba kugwirizanitsa zolaula. Sindinalowemo kwenikweni. "
Patatha zaka zambiri, Anderson akuti anzake ndi abwenzi ake nthawi zambiri amadabwa pozindikira kuti sakonda zolaula. "Ndiwe mnyamata, sichoncho?" Mmodzi wa abwenzi ake apamtima adanyoza pamene Anderson anamuuza.
Anderson akutsimikiza kuti ndi mwamuna, koma malinga ndi miyambo yodziwika bwino ya amuna ndi akazi komanso akatswiri ogonana, nayenso ndi wabodza. Monga momwe wolemba nkhani wotchuka Dan Savage adanenera , "Amuna onse amaonera zolaula. Amuna ochepa omwe amati saonera zolaula ndi abodza kapena odulidwa." Wolemba nkhani wokayikitsa wa Total Sorority Move adafika mpaka ponena kuti mwamuna aliyense angasangalale kudzipatsa "ma hives ndi anaphylactic shock" kuti "aonere atsikana awiri akuchita izi panthawi ya kalasi yowoneka bwino kwambiri ya masewera olimbitsa thupi."
Koma zoona zake n'zakuti, amuna ambiri amamva ngati mmene Anderson amamvera pankhani ya zolaula. Malinga ndi kafukufuku wa mu 2016 mu Archives of Sexual Behavior , pafupifupi mwamuna m'modzi mwa amuna 10 sazionera konse ( Russell Brand ndi m'modzi mwa iwo). Komabe, popeza kafukufuku ndi atolankhani amakonda kuyang'ana kwambiri pa kuonera zolaula ndi momwe zimakhudzira owonera, pali chidziwitso chochepa kwambiri chofotokozera anthu omwe sazionera.
Kodi amuna okonda zolaula amenewa ndi ndani, ndipo ali ndi vuto lotani ndi Accidental Anal Vol. IV?
Garrett Alan ndi wosewera wa cello wazaka 22 wochokera ku LA. Sakonda zolaula chifukwa zimamupangitsa kumva ngati akuwononga luso lake. "Ndikabwera, ndimangokhala pamenepo ngati, 'Ndikuchita chiyani pakali pano?'" akundiuza. "Ndimamva kudzidziwa kwambiri, ndipo ndimayamba kudzimva kuti ndine wolakwa komanso wodetsedwa." Gawo la izi ndi chifukwa cha kuleredwa m'chipembedzo komwe kunamuphunzitsa kuti msakatuli wodzaza ndi YouPorn unali tikiti yopita ku gehena, komanso chifukwa amadziwa kuti ali ndi chida chathanzi komanso chokhutiritsa chomwe ali nacho - malingaliro ake. "Zolaula zomwe ndimapanga m'maganizo mwanga ndizabwino kwambiri kuposa zolaula za pa intaneti," akutero. "Kugwiritsa ntchito malingaliro anga ndi zokumbukira zanga ngati chilimbikitso kumapanga chidziwitso chamalingaliro ndi zauzimu chokhutiritsa kwambiri. Chifukwa cha izi, zimapangitsa kuti ndikhale ndi chilakolako champhamvu kwambiri."
"Chilichonse chitha kuchitika pamene ndimapanga zongoganizira zanga, ndipo ndimakondwera kwambiri ndikudzibweretsera zochitika zatsopano," akupitiriza. "Zimandipangitsa kumva kuti ndikukhudzidwa ndi zosangalatsa zanga komanso ndikugwirizana kwambiri ndi thupi langa. Ndikaonerera zolaula, ndimangodzimva ndekha. Ndikudziwa kuti ndikhoza kuchita bwino. "
Chochititsa chidwi n'chakuti, kafukufuku wambiri wasonyeza kuchepa kwa kulumikizana kwa mitsempha ndi kuchuluka kwa imvi muubongo wa amuna owonera zolaula zomwe zimawongolera kukumbukira, kuphunzira ndi mphotho, kotero ndizomveka kuti zingapangitse amuna ena kumva ngati akuwononga luso lawo lolenga.
Amuna ena ali ndi mavuto ndi ochita sewero la zolaula. Xavier (dzina lodziwika bwino) wazaka 33 amakonda zolaula, koma sangapirire kuona mbolo ya mwamuna wina kapena kuoneka ngati magolovesi a amuna okhaokha nthawi zonse. "Zimangondichotsa," akutero. "Ndilibe chotsutsana ndi thupi la mwamuna, koma sindikufuna kuliona ndikayesa kusiya, makamaka chifukwa anyamata omwe amaonera zolaula nthawi zambiri amakhala oopsa kwambiri. Nchifukwa chiyani nthawi zonse amavala magalasi a dzuwa mkati? Nchifukwa chiyani ndingafune kuwona mbolo ya mwamuna yemwe ali ndi tattoo ya m'mimba ndipo amavala ma aviator okhala ndi polarized m'nyumba?"
Mwachibadwa, amamva chisoni ndi akazi omwe amagonana ndi amuna omwe ali ndi maso. Ngakhale akuvomereza kuti mwina sangakhale ndi nseru ngati iye, amadzipeza akuwauza nkhawa zake m'malo mosangalala ndi zotsatira za ntchito yawo yovuta. Kodi akuchita izi chifukwa chosowa chochita? akudzifunsa yekha. Kodi ndi mgwirizano weniweni? Kodi akulekanitsidwa m'maganizo kuti athetse vuto monga momwe ine ndikanachitira?
"Ndikudziwa kuti ndizosamvetsetseka, komatu ndikukumana ndizoipa kwa aliyense wogwira ntchito," akuseka. "Ndine wotsimikiza kuti pali zolaula kunja kuno, koma ndikuona kuti ndizovuta kugwiritsira ntchito malingaliro anga kuposa momwe ndikuyendera kudzera mavidiyo ambiri kuti ndipeze malo pomwe zokopa zikuwoneka zenizeni ndipo ndili ndi chiwerengero chochepa chazing'ono pamaso panga. "
Kumbali ina ya gululi pali Andy, wazaka 29, yemwe thupi lake lalifupi komanso lochepa silifanana ndi la Magic Mike, yemwe amaoneka ngati munthu wamba, ndipo amakonda kwambiri njira zake zowonera anthu. “Ochita sewero la zolaula amandipangitsa kudzimva kuti ndine wosatetezeka,” akutero. “Sindimawoneka ngati iwo, kaya ndi thupi kapena maliseche. Sindikudziwa ngati ndi vuto la thupi kapena kudzidalira kwambiri, koma ndikayerekeza matupi awo ndi anga, ndimangotaya chidwi.”
Izi zimachitika kawirikawiri — ngakhale kuti zolaula zimaonedwa kuti ndizoipa chifukwa cholimbikitsa miyezo yosalungama ya thupi kwa akazi, zimapangitsa amuna ambiri kudziona kuti sangakwanitse matupi awo. Ndipotu, mwamuna akamaonera zolaula zambiri, amakhala wosakhutira ndi thupi lake, zomwe zingayambitse kudzidalira komanso thanzi labwino la maganizo, makamaka kwa iwo omwe matupi awo sakugwirizana ndi zomwe amayembekezera.
Sikuti anyamata onse amaona zolaula ngati chitsanzo cha momwe kugonana kapena matupi ayenera kukhalira, ngakhale. Ena, monga Anderson, sakonda izo chifukwa zimamveka zabodza, monga kuyesera kuwatsimikizira kugonana ndi chinachake. "Pafupifupi zochitika zonse, malo kapena mizere ya zokambirana zomwe mukuziona pa zolaula zimachitikadi m'moyo weniweni, choncho nthawi zonse ndimamva ngati chithunzi cha kugonana kwa ine," akutero.
Kwa iye, ngakhale zinthu zongopeka, zomwe palibe anyamata okonda pizza kapena ma plumber omwe akutenga nawo mbali ndipo okwatiranawo akuoneka kuti amakondana, sizikuwoneka bwino kwenikweni - chifukwa cha cinematography ya iPhone yosakhala yabwino kwambiri, zimakhala zovuta kuwona zomwe zikuchitika kapena kumvetsetsa zomwe zidapangitsa kuti izi zichitike. "Zimachepetsa chidziwitso chonse cha kugonana kukhala zithunzi zapafupi za ziwalo za thupi zikugonana," akufotokoza. "Ndizabwino ndipo nthawi zina zimakhala zosangalatsa kuziona, koma zimanyalanyaza chithunzi chonse cha zomwe zimapangitsa kugonana kukhala kosangalatsa. Nanga bwanji kupsompsonana, kuyang'anizana maso, kugwirana, fungo ndi zomwe zimapangitsa kuti zinthuzo zikhale zotentha?"
Zachidziwikire, pali makanema mamiliyoni ambiri omwe amawonetsa mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya kugonana, koma kwa amuna ena, kuonera zolaula zambiri zoyambirira kungakhale ndi zotsatirapo zoyipa zomwe zimawalepheretsa kuonera zolaula zilizonse pambuyo pake. "Zinayamba kundigonana ndikuchotsa umunthu wa kugonana," wolemba reddit wotchedwa PanchDog adagawana pa ulusi wa /r/askmen wodzipereka kwa amuna omwe sakonda zolaula. "Ndinayambadi kupatsa akazi malingaliro, ndipo zinali zoonekeratu mu kugonana komwe ndinali nako. Zinandipangitsa kuti ndifune kugonana mwachangu momwe ndingathere. Ingoyikani mkati mwake ndikumenya."
Pakati pa mzerewu, zolaula nthawi zambiri zimasonyeza malo apamwamba ndi maulendo omwe amavomereza, kuchita ndi kuyankhulana kuti apeze bwino, koma mukawona owonetsa akuwatsanulira popanda kuthandizira, zikuwoneka ngati mutatha.
Bowen (dzina lake lenileni si lenileni), mtolankhani wazaka 34 wochokera ku Denver, adapeza izi mwanjira yovuta. Pamene anali wosadziwa bwino momwe angayesere "machitidwe" omwe adawaonera mu zolaula, anzake sanachitepo kanthu momwe ochita sewero omwe ali mumavidiyowo adachitira. Mwachitsanzo, pamene anayesa kuchotsa mbolo yake kumaliseche kwa chibwenzi chake cha ku koleji ndikuyiyika mu anus yake monga momwe adawonera mu kanema, mtsikanayo sanalume milomo yake ndikunena kuti, "Ndipheni, Abambo ," monga momwe mtsikanayo adachitira pa sikirini. M'malo mwake, anafuula ndikutuluka magazi pang'ono kwa maola 24. Anachita mantha ndipo anamva chisoni. Chinthu chomaliza chomwe ankafuna kuchita chinali kuphunzira zomwe zimatchedwa "maluso" omwe amavulaza kapena kusasangalatsa anzawo, kotero anasiya zolaula m'malo mwake.
“Ndinkaziona ngati kuti zinali malo osungiramo luso logawana, koma ndinakhumudwa nditazindikira kuti palibe zambiri zoti ndiphunzirepo,” iye anatero. “Sizimakhala zosangalatsa kwambiri pamene mukudziwa kuti zinthu zambiri zomwe akuchita ndi zongodzionetsera.” Komanso, iye anati, sizinawonetsepo chinthu chimodzi chomwe ankafunadi kuti aphunzirepo - chilolezo. Monga munthu wowongoka mtima, wodziwika bwino mu mthunzi wa kayendetsedwe ka #MeToo, Bowen anali ndi chidwi chowona chilolezo chikupangidwa mwanjira yotentha yomwe angagwiritse ntchito pochita zinthu ndi anthu ena, koma sanayang'ane mokwanira kuti apeze kanema woyenera (mwachionekere sanakumanepo ndi chozizwitsa ichi chopanga mafilimu ).
Ambiri aamuna pa / r / askmen akuwombera za abwenzi olaula omwe amadana nawo, makamaka. "[Porn] ndi mtundu wofalitsa womwe umalongosola malingaliro a munthu pankhani yogonana / chilolezo, ndi zina zotero," akulemba motero. "[Ndizo] malo olakwika kuti aphunzire zinthu zimenezo." Chimes china mu: "Ndimagwirizana. Ndikuganiza kuti zolaula pokhala anthu ambiri akuyamba kugonana zimakhazikitsa anthu ambiri chifukwa choyembekezera zolakwika ndi maganizo olakwika. "
Monga munthu amene amakonda zolaula, ndikufuna kutenga amuna awa m'manja opanda ukazi ndikuwauza mofatsa kuti zolaula zikupitirira kusintha - kuti m'badwo watsopano wa opanga mafilimu aluso monga Erika Lust ndi Vex Ashley akupanga zolaula zotentha, zochokera ku chilolezo pogwiritsa ntchito ochita sewero omwe amayimira matupi ndi zilakolako zonse mwanjira yachikhalidwe komanso yosangalatsa. Chifukwa chake, ndimayesa ndi Anderson, ndikufunitsitsa kudziwa ngati angakonde kuonera zolaula zomwe zimapeza tsatanetsatane molondola komanso kugwiritsa ntchito makanema osiyanasiyana komanso nkhani zenizeni kuti apange mtundu wa kupsinjika ndi kulumikizana komwe kumawonetsa kugonana kwenikweni.
Amayankha kuti adzakhale omasuka kuwona zosiyana ndi zolaula zomwe adakulirapo, koma amakayikira kuti zidzamupangitsa. Kumapeto kwa tsikuli, akunena kuti amakonda kwambiri anthu kuposa ma pixel. Iye adakhalanso ndi anthu omwe akuyesera kumutsimikizira. "Anthu amakonda zinthu zosiyana, ndipo zomwe ndimakonda zimangokhala anthu enieni omwe ndingathe kuyankhulana nawo," akulongosola. "Ndikulemekeza kwambiri chifukwa chake anthu ena amaonera zolaula, ndipo ndikusangalala kuti anthu akumasulira bwino, koma sizingandisangalatse ndipo ndikuchita bwino."