MAFUNSO: Cholinga cha nkhaniyi ndikuti "magwiridwe antchito" ali ndi mwayi wathu wosakhulupirika. Ndikofunikira chifukwa chikhumbo (dopamine) chogonana ndi mnzake wothandizirana chimayambitsa ma circuits ofanana a neural (mphotho yoyendetsera mphoto) ya chilakolako monga zolaula. Kukhoza kukana (executive function) imagwiritsa ntchito mabwalo amtundu womwewo monga kukana kugwiritsa ntchito zolaula. Kugwira ntchito pang'ono kwa madera oyang'anira izi ndichizindikiro chazovuta komanso zosokoneza bongo. Hypofontality ndipamene masekeli azolakalakawa sali pantchitoyo.
Mutu: Chifukwa Chake Ena Amakana Kugwirizana Kusakhulupirika Koposa Ena
Scott Barry Kaufman, Ph.D.
Zatumizidwa: 05 / 17 / 11 09: 21 AM ET
Ndiwe munthu wokongola muubwenzi wokonda, wodzipereka komanso wosangalala. Komabe, pamakhala mayesero nthawi zonse. Pagolosale, munthu wokongola pamzere wolipira amatimwetulira ndi nsidze. Mumayamba kucheza mwachinyengo, ndipo munthuyu akukufunsani nambala yanu. Kodi mumatani? Bwanji osabera? Kodi chikukulepheretsani ndi chiyani?
Nthawi ngati izi, pamakhala kusamvana pakati pamatumbo anu (gonana ndi munthuyu tsopano!) Ndi cholinga chanu chanthawi yayitali (khalani odzipereka kwa wokondedwa wanu!). Kukhala ndi chibadwa mwa iko kokha sikulakwa. Ndi chizindikiro chabe kuti ndinu munthu. Makamaka aliyense, wosakwatiwa kapena ayi, amangokokedwa kwa anthu okongola. Mukakumana ndi munthu wokongola, zizolowezi za anthu zimayamba zokha ndipo zimayang'ana nthawi yayitali m'maso mwa munthu wokongola. Zonsezi zimachitika popanda kuyesetsa kapena kuwongolera chilichonse. Kuyang'ana m'maso ndi munthu wokongola kumapindulitsanso kuubongo wathu, kuyambitsa madera okhudzana ndi mphotho.
Poganizira momwe izi zilili zachilengedwe, zodziwikiratu, komanso zamphamvu, wina angafunse: chifukwa chiyani aliyense sabera? Zachidziwikire, aliyense sabera, ndikubweretsa funso: chifukwa chiyani anthu ena ali okhoza kuthana ndi mayesowa kuposa ena?
Kafukufuku waposachedwapa akusonyeza kuti yankho lake liri ndi zambiri zokhudzana ndi chidziwitso chozindikira. Chikhalidwe chosasintha ndicho kuchita zinthu mopupuluma. Kuwonjezera mphamvu zimenezi kumafuna khama, komanso njira zabwino kwambiri zomwe mungakhale nazo (ganizirani zonse zomwe Tiger Woods analandira), zimakhala zovuta kuti muzitha kusintha maganizo anu.
M'zaka zaposachedwa, ma neuropsychologists apeza malo am'magazi am'mbali kutsogolo (pafupi pamphumi) mwa anthu omwe amathandizira kudziletsa. Izi zomwe zimatchedwa "ntchito yayikulu," zomwe zinali gawo lomaliza la ubongo wathu kusintha, zimakhudza kukonzekera, kuletsa kapena kuchedwa kuyankha. Nthawi iliyonse pamene wina akuyenera kuyang'ana kwambiri ntchito ndikunyalanyaza zosokoneza, malowa amakhala otakataka. Momwe madera awa aubongo amawonekera kumaneneratu zotsatira zofunika kwambiri, kuphatikiza ngati anthu atha kutsatira malamulo a anthu, kukana mayesero osiyanasiyana ndikupanga machitidwe owopsa. Kuwongolera kwamphamvu kumaneneratu za kufunitsitsa kokana kukhumba kudya M & Ms mukamadya.
Chifukwa chake, oyang'anira wamkulu atha kutengapo gawo pazochita zabodza. Ngati cholinga chanu chanthawi yayitali ndikukhalabe wokhulupirika kwa mnzanu, ndipo muli ndi mayesero ambiri, izi zimafunikira kuwongolera kwakukulu. Kuwongolera akuluakulu kumathandizanso kuti anthu azipewa zovuta poyambira pomwe angakopeke ndi omwe angathe kukhala nawo pachibwenzi.
Umboni waposachedwapa umasonyeza kuti ntchito zapamwamba zimakhala ndi zambiri zokhudzana ndi chinyengo. Simone Ritter ndi anzake ogwira ntchito ku Radboud University Nijmegen adapeza kuti muzochitika zachikhalidwe, anthu omwe amagonana ndi amuna kapena akazi okhaokha amasonyeza kuti alibe chidwi chosiyana ndi amuna omwe sali pa banja. Mabetcha onse achotsedwa, komabe, pamene iwo amalipidwa misonkho ndi experimenter, monga kuperekedwa kwa nthawi yayitali. Muzochitikazi, ndi akuluakulu awo oyang'anira, panalibenso kusiyana pakati pa anthu omwe ali paokha komanso achikondi. Zikuwoneka kuti anthu omwe amagwirizana ndi anthu okhaokha amakana okondedwa omwe angakhale nawo pomwe ali ndi zidziwitso zokwanira komanso nthawi yosankha mwanzeru.
Pakafukufuku wofulumira mu Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Tila Pronk ndi anzawo ku Radboud University Nijmegen adayang'ana nkhaniyi mwachindunji pofufuza zasayansi chifukwa chake anthu ena ali ndi zovuta kuposa ena kuti akhalebe okhulupirika abwenzi awo achikondi. Pakati pa maphunziro atatuwa, adasanthula za ubale womwe ulipo pakati pamachitidwe olamulira ndi kuthekera kwa anthu kukhalabe okhulupirika.
Pakafukufuku wawo woyamba, ophunzira 72 okondana adakwaniritsa ntchito yoyang'anira kuthana ndi kuthekera kwawo kusinthana pakati pa malangizo awiri ndi mafunso amafupipafupi omwe adawafunsa momwe akukhalira okhulupirika kwa wokondedwa wawo (mwachitsanzo, "Ngati munthu wokongola / Mtsikana amachita chidwi ndi ine, ndimavutika kuti ndithane ndi ziyeso ”). Adapeza kuti omwe ali ndi oyang'anira ochepa amayesa kunena kuti ali ndivuto lalikulu kuti akhalebe okhulupirika. Panalibe kusiyana pakati pa amuna ndi akazi.
Phunziro lawo lachiŵiri, iwo amayang'ana makhalidwe amdziko lenileni mu chitsanzo cha amuna okha. Amuna makumi awiri ndi awiri ogonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha amamaliza ntchito yolamulira yomwe imafuna kulemba makalata kukumbukira panthawi imodzimodziyo kusinthira chidziwitso. Ntchitoyi imafuna kukumbukira nthawi zonse za kukumbukira, zomwe zimapereka misonkho yolamulira. Atamaliza ntchitoyi, ophunzira adafunsidwa kuti akhale mu chipinda chodikirira kufikira woyesera atawaitanira.
Kenako adalowa wamkazi wokongola, yemwe oyeserera adamulembera kuti awathandize pa kuyesa kwawo. Mkaziyu adaphunzitsidwa ndi omwe amayesa kuchita zinthu mwaubwenzi koma osati mwachidwi kapena mosakopeka. Palibe aliyense mwa omwe adatenga nawo gawo omwe anazindikira kuti azimayiwo anali gawo la kuyesaku. Zochitikazo zinajambulidwa pavidiyo, ndipo pambuyo pake, azimayi ndi owonera anayi odziyimira pawokha adawonetsedwa mphindi zisanu zoyambirirazo, ndipo adaweruza kukondana kwamnyamatayo. Onse owonerera adagwirizana pakati pawo pazomwe adawona. Mogwirizana ndi kafukufuku wawo woyamba, adazindikira kuti kutsika kwaulamuliro, kumachulukitsa machitidwe okopana.
Phunziro lawo lachitatu, iwo amayang'ana ngati maulamuliro a akuluakulu amathandiza anthu kuti asakhale ndi vuto linalake. Amuna ndi akazi makumi asanu ndi limodzi mphambu asanu anamaliza mayeso otchuka a Stroop, omwe anayenera kutchula mtundu wa mawu ponyalanyaza tanthauzo la mawuwo. Izi siziphweka: yesani nokha!
Atatenga gawo loyang'anira oyang'anira, adauzidwa kuti azisewera "masewera oti angadziwane" ndi omwe atenga nawo mbali mwachisawawa, momwe angafunse ndikuyankha mafunso awo (mwachitsanzo, "Kodi mungakonde kutchuka?") . Adawonetsedwa chithunzi cha yemwe akutenga nawo mbali (yemwe amangokhala munthu wokongola wotsutsana naye!). Masewera atatha, adawonetsa kukongola komwe adapeza yemwe akutenga nawo mbali posuntha chozembera kwinakwake pakati paosakongola kwenikweni mpaka kukongola komanso kuchuluka komwe angakonde kukumana ndi omwe akutenga nawo mbali m'moyo weniweni.
Chosadabwitsa, pamene omwe amatenga nawo mbali amapeza kuti mnzakeyo ndiwokopa, amafunitsitsa atakumana naye. Mogwirizana ndi kuneneratu kwawo, adapeza kuti oyang'anira wamkulu amachepetsa chikhumbo chawo chokomana ndi ena okongola, koma okhawo omwe ali pachibwenzi. Mwina izi ndichifukwa choti anthu osakwatira sanafunikire kugwiritsa ntchito zidziwitso kuti apange chisankho ngakhale zilakolako zawo zinali zamphamvu ngati zomwe zili pachibwenzi. Komanso, pomwe amuna ambiri adavotera winayo monga wokongola kuposa akazi, amuna ndi akazi (osakwatiwa kapena omwe ali pachibwenzi) nawonso anali ndi chiyembekezo chofunitsitsa atakumana ndi mnzakeyo.
Chikuchitika ndi chiani apa? Chifukwa chiyani kuwongolera maudindo ndikofunikira kwambiri pokana mayesero achinyengo? Ofufuzawa akuwonetsa zotheka zingapo.
Kuthekera kwina ndikuti oyang'anira akulu amathandizira kuletsa kuchita zomwe aliyense akufuna. Kwa abwenzi ambiri, kukhala ndi chidwi sichabwino, koma kuchitapo kanthu sichabwino. Kuwongolera kwamphamvu kumathandizanso kuletsa chidwi chofotokozera chidwi cha omwe angakhale nawo pachibwenzi, monga kukopana ndi kulowa m'malo omwe mayesero apitilira kuwonekera (mwachitsanzo, "kucheza"). Kuletsa konseku kumafunikira zidziwitso zochepa.
Omwe ali ndi magawo ochepa oyang'anira akhoza kuganiziranso zambiri za omwe angakhale abwenzi lawo. Kafukufuku akuwonetsa ubale wolimba pakati pa oyang'anira ndi kuwongolera malingaliro wamba. Omwe ali ndiulamuliro wapamwamba atha kungoyenda-yenda pang'ono, chifukwa chake amakhala osatetezeka akamayang'anizana ndi mnzake yemwe angakhale naye pachibwenzi. Kuwongolera koyang'anira kumathandizanso pakuthandizira kukhalabe ndi malingaliro a mnzanuyo mukamacheza ndi munthu wina wotentha. Anthu omwe ali ndiudindo woyang'anira wamkulu atha kukhala ndi zovuta kuzisunga m'maganizo mwawo motero sangakwanitse kulingalira bwino za zotulukapo zokopa mayeserowo. Ndizothekanso kuti anthu omwe ali ndi maudindo osiyanasiyana omwe ali pachibwenzi amakumana ndi mayesero osiyanasiyana akakumana ndi omwe angathe kukhala nawo pachibwenzi. Zonsezi ndizotheka kuti mupitirize kufufuza.
Zotsatira za kafukufukuyu ndizazikulu. Ndani angaganize kuti china chake chazidziwitso komanso chopanda tanthauzo monga kuthekera kosinthira zilembo zokumbukira kapena kutchula mitundu mwachangu momwe zingathere chingafanane ndi kuthana ndi chiyeso chobera? Kafukufukuyu akuwonetsa momwe kulumikizana kolumikizana mwamphamvu kuli ndi china chilichonse m'miyoyo yathu. Nthawi zonse pamene anthu amatha kugwiritsa ntchito chidziwitso kumachepetsa, amakhala pachiwopsezo chokwaniritsa kusakhulupirika.
Zambiri zitha kusokoneza kuyang'anira, kuphatikiza kuchuluka kwa ntchito kapena kupsinjika. Kafukufuku akuwonetsa kuti anthu amakonda kusakhulupirika akakhala ndi vuto lalikulu lamaganizidwe. Ingoganizirani kukhala wotchuka kapena wandale wokhala ndi zosankha zambiri zogonana komanso wopanikizika pantchito - ndiyo njira yosakhulupirika! Izi sizoyenera kukhululukira aliyense, zachidziwikire. Koma zimawonjezera pang'ono pakumvetsetsa kwathu.
Onjezerani mowa ndi kusakaniza, ndipo muiwale za izo. Mowa wasonyeza kuti akufooketsa kayendetsedwe ka chidziwitso, ndipo amasonyezedwanso kuti akugwirizana ndi kusakhulupirika ndi makhalidwe owopsa a chiwerewere pakati pa ophunzira a koleji (omwe kale ali ndi kagulu kakang'ono ka ulamuliro woyendetsa poyambira).
Makhalidwe a nkhaniyi? Kulimbana ndi chiyeso cha kubera pamafunika khama. Ngati muli ndi oyang'anira ambiri, mwina simungathe kubera mnzanu. Ngati mulibe zidziwitso zambiri, ndipo mukufuna kukhala wokhulupirika kwa mnzanu, mukuyembekeza kuti simuli okongola, olemera, otchuka, opsinjika kwambiri kapena oledzera. Ndipo pempherani kuti musayang'ane mabokosi onsewa nthawi imodzi. Kapenanso mudzakhala m'mavuto.
Tsopano, ngati mukufuna kuwunika mnzanu yemwe mukufuna kukwatirana naye kuti awone momwe angakunyengeni, apatseni mayeso a St'op Stroop. Ndikukulangizani kuti musachite izi patsiku loyamba, apo ayi, angakunamizeni - ndipo pachifukwa chabwino!