Yatumizidwa: 09/24/2013 - LUNGANI KU POST
Ziwerengero zogwiritsa ntchito zolaula pa intaneti nthawi zambiri zimakhudzidwa. Othandizira zolaula amatulutsa manambala awo pofuna kuwonjezera ndalama zotsatsa, ndipo omwe amatsutsa zolaula amatenga ziwerengero zomwe angapeze kuti athe kuwonetsa vuto lomwe likufalikira. Ngakhale ziwerengero zowerengera kwambiri zikuwonetsa kuti kugwiritsa ntchito zolaula - komwe kumayendetsedwa ndi kupezeka kwa intaneti, kuthekera komanso kusadziwika - kukukulira. Zomwe mungaone zowopsa kuposa kuchuluka kwa zolaula zomwe timadya ndizomwe zingakhudze moyo wanu wogonana.
Zolakwa Zimagwiritsidwa Ntchito, Chimwemwe Chimatha
Mu kafukufuku waposachedwa wa akatswiri 68 odziwika bwino pankhani yogonana ndi maubwenzi, 86 peresenti anati amakhulupirira kuti zolaula zakhudza kwambiri maubwenzi awo. Pafupifupi magawo awiri mwa atatu, 63 peresenti, anati akuganiza kuti kugwiritsa ntchito zolaula kumasintha ziyembekezo za amuna za momwe kugonana ndi wokondedwa weniweni kuyenera kukhalira, ndipo 85 peresenti anati akuganiza kuti zolaula zakhudza kudzidalira kwa akazi, makamaka chifukwa akazi amamva ngati kuti tsopano ayenera kuchita zinthu ngati nyenyezi zolaula m'chipinda chogona.
Kafukufuku wina wapereka zotsatira zofanana. Mwachitsanzo, kafukufuku wina wasonyeza kuti akazi omwe amuna awo amaonera zolaula pafupipafupi (malinga ndi momwe mkaziyo amaonera) sasangalala kwambiri ndi maubwenzi awo kuposa akazi omwe amakhala ndi amuna omwe nthawi zambiri amagwiritsa ntchito zolaula kapena sagwiritsa ntchito zonse (monga momwe mkaziyo amadziwira). Kafukufuku yemweyo adapeza kuti kudzidalira kwa mkazi kumachepa pamene mwamuna wake akugwiritsa ntchito zolaula. Madandaulo ambiri omwe akazi omwe amuna awo amagwiritsa ntchito zolaula nthawi zambiri ndi akuti sangathe kufanana ndi zithunzi zomwe zawonetsedwa pa intaneti.
Mwina, komabe, ndi amuna omwe ayenera kukhala ndi nkhawa poyeza. Taganizirani za Robert, wolemba mapulogalamu a pa kompyuta a 26:
Chibwenzi changa Melissa ndi wogulitsa yemwe amakhala masabata ake akuyenda, amabwera kunyumba ndikukhala ndi ine kumapeto kwa sabata. Moyo wathu wogonana unali wabwino mpaka pafupifupi chaka chapitacho. Ndinkakonda kuyembekezera Lachisanu usiku chifukwa ndimadziwa kuti chinthu choyamba chomwe chidzafike atafika kunyumba ndikuti tigone chifukwa chogonana, thukuta, komanso zogonana kwambiri. Mphamvu zathu zogonana (zanga) nthawi zambiri zimabweretsa gawo lofulumira, lotsatiridwa ndi shawa (limodzi), chakudya chamadzulo, ndikupanga zosangalatsa mosangalala usiku womwewo. Chaka chatha, komabe, ndakhala ndikuvutika kuti ndikwaniritse erection, ndipo nthawi zina sindimatha kutulutsa umuna. Ndipo sitikuchita kawiri usiku umodzi monga tinkachitira kale. Ndakhala ndikuwonetsako zolaula kangapo kuti ndithane nazo. Zomwe sindingathe kumvetsetsa ndichifukwa chake ndili wokonzeka, wofunitsitsa, komanso wokhoza ndikamalowa patsamba langa lolaula - zomwe ndimachita pafupipafupi Melissa ali panjira - koma sindingathe kugwira ntchito ndikakhala ndi chinthu chenicheni pomwepo patsogolo panga. Sindikutopetsedwa ndi Melissa, ndipo ndikuganiza kuti ndiwokonda kwambiri komanso wosangalatsa.
Kulephera kwa Robert kuchita zogonana n’kofala kwambiri pakati pa anyamata kuposa momwe munthu angaganizire, ndipo izi zikugwirizana mwachindunji ndi kugwiritsa ntchito kwake zolaula. Ndipotu, zikuonekeratu kuti zolaula pa intaneti ndi zomwe zimayambitsa vuto la erectile dysfunction (ED) komanso kuchedwa kutulutsa umuna (DE) mwa amuna athanzi omwe ali ndi thanzi labwino akamakula. Mu kafukufuku wina, amuna ogwiritsa ntchito zolaula adanena kuti zimawavuta kwambiri kuchitiridwa nkhanza ndi anzawo enieni. Atafunsidwa ngati vutoli likugwirizana ndi kuonera zolaula, anthu omwe adafunsidwawo adayankha kuti poyamba lidawathandiza kukhala osangalala kwambiri panthawi yogonana, koma pakapita nthawi lidakhala ndi zotsatira zosiyana. Chifukwa chake, chifukwa cha zolaula, akazi ambiri tsopano akupeza kuti ali pachibwenzi ndi amuna omwe akuvutika ndi chiwerewere, zomwe zimakhudza akazi mofanana ndi amuna. Kupatula apo, ngati mwamuna wanu sangathe kudzuka, kupitiriza, kapena kufika pachimake, chisangalalo chanu chogonana chikhoza kuchepa.
Madandaulo amodzi pa zolaula zomwe zimachititsa kuti amuna azigonana ndi awa:
- Alibe vuto pochita erection kapena zolaula ndi zolaula, koma mwayekha, ndi wokondedwa wake, iye akulimbana ndi chimodzi kapena zonse.
- Amatha kuchita zogonana ndi kukwaniritsa zolaula ndi mnzake, koma kufika poyambira kumatenga nthawi yaitali kuposa momwe iyeyo ndi mnzawoyo amachitira.
- Amatha kumangokhalirana kukondana ndi mnzake, koma amangokhalira kuwonetsa zojambulajambula pogwiritsa ntchito zithunzi zolaula pa intaneti.
- Amakonda kwambiri kujambula zithunzi zolaula kuti azikhala ndi moyo weniweni, kuti aziwoneka mozama komanso kuti azichita nawo zinthu.
- Amasunga zinsinsi zokhudzana ndi zolaula kuchokera kwa wokondedwa wake (nthawi yambiri yogwiritsa ntchito zolaula, mafano owonedwa, ndi zina zotero)
- Wokondedwa wake amamva ngati "mkazi winayo."
Vutoli silimangobwera chifukwa cha kuchuluka kwa maliseche kapena mpheto; ndizokhudzana kwambiri ndikuti amuna ambiri amakhala okangalika m'maso komanso amatsegulidwa ndi zokopa zatsopano. Kwenikweni, bambo yemwe amathera 70, 80, kapena 90% ya moyo wake wogonana akuganizira ndikuchita maliseche zolaula - zithunzi zosawerengeka za achinyamata, zosangalatsa, zosintha mosiyanasiyana ndi zochitika zogonana -, popita nthawi, amatha kupeza -flesh amakumana ndi zolimbikitsa pang'ono kuposa kuwonongedwa kosatha kwazinthu zatsopano m'mutu mwake. Chifukwa chake zomwe tikuwona tsopano pamlingo wokulirapo ndikulumikizana kwamalingaliro ndi omwe amagonana nawo omwe akuwonetsera osati monga kukhumudwitsa kugonana, koma mwamalingaliro monga kusowa chidwi ndi maubwenzi apamtima apadziko lonse lapansi. Ndipo mankhwala opititsa patsogolo kugonana - Viagra, Cialis, Levitra, ndi zina zotero - sizingakonze zinthu chifukwa mankhwalawa amangochepetsa mitsempha yamagazi kuti ikhale yolimba, osapanga imodzi. Ubongo ndi thupi zimayenera kudzutsidwa koyamba mwa iwo okha. Popanda izi, palibe mlingo wa "erection enhancing" mankhwala omwe angathandize.
Ndiye… Kugonananso?
Ndipotu, nkhani si yoipa konse. Pofuna kulimbikitsa, tifunika kungoyang'ana ubongo wa anthu omwe akuchira ku mankhwala osokoneza bongo. N'zodziwika bwino kuti kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo nthawi zonse kumapangitsa ubongo "kudzisintha". Kusintha kwa mitsempha kumeneku, makamaka, ndiko komwe kumapangitsa kuti kusiya kusuta kukhale kovuta komanso kubwereranso ku chizolowezi chofala pakati pa anthu omwe amayesa kusiya. Komabe, kafukufuku wambiri wasonyeza kuti ngati munthu wogwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo atakhala wosamwa kwa miyezi isanu ndi umodzi mpaka chaka, ubongo nthawi zambiri umabwerera ku chinthu chofanana kwambiri ndi momwe ulili. Umboni wosadziwika bwino umasonyeza kuti zizolowezi za khalidwe - kuphatikizapo chizolowezi cha zolaula - ndizofanana, ndipo ubongo ukhoza kudzikonza wokha ukakhala ndi nthawi yofunikira kuti uchire. Malinga ndi tsamba lawebusayiti la Your Brain on Porn , kuzimitsa zolaula nthawi zambiri "kudzayambitsanso" ubongo, kulola ma dopamine receptors omwe awonongeka chifukwa cha kukondoweza kwambiri (ndikupangitsa kuti kugonana kusagwire bwino ntchito komanso kusakonda) kuti achire, pamapeto pake kubwezeretsa ma circuits a mphotho ya ubongo ku chinthu chomwe chikuyandikira. Mwa kuyankhula kwina, munthu amene amaonera zolaula akamapewa nthawi yayitali, vuto lake logonana komanso/kapena kusakonda kwake kugonana limatha.
Robert Weiss LCSW, CSAT-S, ndi wachiwiri kwa purezidenti wamkulu wa chitukuko cha zachipatala ku Elements Behavioral Health . Wolemba komanso katswiri pa nkhani zokhudzana ndi ubale pakati pa ukadaulo wa digito ndi kugonana kwa anthu, Bambo Weiss adagwira ntchito ngati katswiri wa atolankhani ku CNN, Oprah Winfrey Network, New York Times, Los Angeles Times, ndi Today Show, pakati pa ena ambiri. Bambo Weiss ndi mlembi wa buku la Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men, komanso wolemba limodzi ndi Dr. Jennifer Schneider buku la Untangled the Web: Sex, Porn, and Fantasy Obsession in the Internet Age komanso buku lomwe likubwera mu 2013, Closer Together, Further Apart: The Effect of Technology and the Internet on Sex, Intimacy and Relationships, limodzi ndi nkhani ndi mitu yambiri yowunikidwa ndi anzawo.