Kotero kunali kumapeto kwa September watha kuti ndinatsiriza kugwiritsa ntchito zolaula. Ndapitilizabe kuseweretsa maliseche. Ndakhala ndi mphindi zochepa pomwe ndimayesedwa koma sindinayambe ndakhala ndikugwiritsa ntchito zolaula. Ino si nthawi yoyamba yomwe ndimayesetsa kusiya zolaula. Ndakhala ndikugwiritsa ntchito mphamvu zanga m'mbuyomu ndipo zinagwira ntchito kwa sabata limodzi ndi masiku angapo pamenepo koma ndimangofika pomwe zimangochitika.
Nthawi zina ndimayamba kuonera zolaula kenako ndikumayang'ana zolaula ndipo zinthu zikhala mwanjira imeneyi mpaka ndimve kutsimikiza mtima kapena kunyansidwa ndekha kuti ndiyesenso kuyimanso mozungulira ndikuzungulira. Izi zidapitilira 10 mwina zaka 15.
Zosinthazi ndizobisika tsopano sindine zolaula. Ndawona chikhumbo changa chogonana ndi mkazi wanga chikuwonjezeka. Ndikuwoneka kuti ndikukwaniritsa tsiku ndi tsiku; Ndinayambanso kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi ndakhala ndikuyambiranso. Chinthu chabwino kwambiri kwa ine sindimamva manyazi monga kale.
Kuwonerera zolaula nthawi zonse kumachitika chifukwa chofuna zithunzi zowonjezereka. Zolaula za Vanilla zinagwira ntchito kwakanthawi kenako ndimakonda kujambula zolaula zomwe zimayambitsa dopamine ndimadziwa kuti ndizolakwika kwa ine ndikuganiza ndichifukwa chake ndidapitako. Zinandipatsa HOCD yoyipa kwambiri iyi ndiye lingaliro lokakamiza kuti ndiyenera kukhala gay chifukwa cha zomwe ndimayang'ana. Nditaphunzira njira zamankhwala ndi zamaganizidwe zomwe zimachitika mwa ine ndidayamba kutenganso moyo wanga tsiku ndi tsiku. Tsopano ndili ndi HOCD yaying'ono kwambiri ndikumva kuti ndi kanthawi kochulukirapo izi zidzatheratu. Ndikumva kuti ndapulumutsidwa.
Koma zonsezi zimadza ndi chenjezo! Ndikukhulupirira kuti zolaula ndizoledzeretsa komanso ngati chizolowezi china chilichonse chimakhala chosavuta kubwerera m'mbuyo ngati mungakhale osakhutira ngati mutachotsa mpirawo kapena ngati simukuyesera kuthana ndi zomwe zimayambitsa inu kuti mupeze chitonthozo mu china chake chokha.
Chifukwa chake ndachita bwino ndipo manyazi adakwera pang'ono ndipo ndikuzitenga tsiku limodzi. Chovuta kwa ine tsopano ndikuyamba kupanga ndikupanga moyo, wokha, womwe sindimamva kufunika kogwiritsa ntchito zolaula nthawi zonse kuti ndikwaniritse zomwe ndimamva ndipo nthawi zina ndimamvabe. Chovuta ndikuti ndisasinthe zolaula ndizatsopano, chovuta ndikumakhala bwino pakhungu langa.
2018 ndi yokhudza kukhala wopanda zolaula koma imakhudzanso za ine, za ine kudzisamalira ndikudziyang'anira ndekha, osati mwadyera. Momwe ndimafunira kuti ndisiye kuchita zinthu zomwe zimandivuta zolaula, kumwa mowa mwauchidakwa, kudzimenya ndekha, kukhala ndi ziyembekezo zosagwirizana ndi malingaliro anga, kukhala wopanda chifundo kwa ine ndekha, osadzikonda. Ndilibe kauntala sindikudziwa tsiku lomwe ndidamaliza PMO kumapeto kwa Seputembala ndikuganiza. Sindiwerengera kuti ndikuyesera kuti ndikhale ndi moyo wabwino pomwe zolaula ndizakale komanso zizolowezi zatsopano komanso njira yatsopano yobadwira.
LINK - Komwe ndiri miyezi ya 3 osati kuwerengera
;