Zaka 30 - Kukhala Mwamuna Ndikutaya Ukazi Wanga

Kodi aliyense wa inu omwe ndiophunzira bwino kwambiri kuyambira pomwe azindikira kuti zochitika zachilendo zikuchitika mkati mwanu? Kuti mukuyamba kuchita ngati mwamuna kuposa mkazi? Mukukhala osamvetsera kwambiri ndipo Stewart Smalley ndi Aragorn ambiri?

Apa ndi pomwe zinthu zanga zimalowa. M'moyo wanga wonse ndakhala ndikumverera ngati mkazi mkati. Kumverera uku kumayendera limodzi ndi vuto lokhala ndi moyo wa PMO (Ndine 29 ndipo ndakhala ndikuledzera zaka 20). Mavuto anga ambiri amachokera kukuzunzidwa kwanthawi yayitali, kosalekeza, komanso kuzunza ana komwe ndimakambirana pambuyo pake. Komabe, kumayambiriro kwa mizere itatu ya chaka chino, ndimafuna kuvala zovala zokongola. Ndinagula zikopa zingapo zomwe zimakhala zolimba, imodzi yofiirira ndi tiyi, ndipo inayo yakuda. Iwo anali achikazi akuyang'ana momwe iwo anagwera mthupi langa. Ndinkazivala kumisonkhano komanso panja, ndipo ndinkachita mantha kwambiri komanso ndinali wokondwa kuti palibe amene amandinena monga momwe amayi anga ankandichitira ndili mwana osadzifunira chilichonse chabwino. Ndinawatopetsa kwa nthawi yayitali. Koma ndinayamba kupita patsogolo ndikamachita chidwi ndi amuna. Sindine gay. Ndimakonda pussy haha. Komabe, m'mene mitsinje yanga idakula, ndidawona zinthu zachilendo zikuchitika:

1. Chabwino, masiku angapo apitawo, ndinayatsa ma hoodi amenewo. Ndimapita kuphwando nditavala hoodie yanga yakuda ya atsikana, ndipo pamene ndimatsika mgalimoto, ndidakhala ndi mphindi yakuwululira ngati, "Hei, ukudziwa chiyani, ndikuwoneka ngati msungwana wovala wavala izi." Ndinang'amba hoodie ndipo ndikupita ku Goodwill. Inenso ndikutulutsa inayo.
2. Ndakhalanso munthu womvera kwambiri. Nthawi zonse ndimamulola mayiyo kuti aziyang'anira, azicheza ndi azimayi omwe ali ndi katundu wambiri yemwe ndimangokhalira kukonza, ndiyeno ndimaimbidwa mlandu nthawi yonse yakusakhala opanda ungwiro kapena osakwanira. Tsopano, ndikuyamba kukhazikitsa malire ndi akazi. Mabwana, ogwira nawo ntchito, komanso akazi omwe ndimawadziwa. Kuyamba kuwalola kuthana ndi malingaliro awo ndikukwaniritsa zomwe ndikufuna (ndikudzilemekeza ndekha komanso anthu onse m'malo mwa akazi okha). Ndine wokonda kwambiri izi, koma zandipangitsa kumva bwino kwambiri. "No More Mr. Nice Guy" ikundithandiza kuthana ndi izi, ndipo ndikugwirabe ntchito zomwe zili m'bukuli.
3. Mawa, ndikumeta tsitsi langa lomwe ndimafuna kuti ndikule, chifukwa ndimamverera ngati mkazi wolivala. Ndikanati ndichite lero, koma kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi ndikusintha magwiridwe antchito kunaponyera wrench m'menemo. Ndikufupikira kalembedwe kofupikitsa, koyenera ... ndipo gawo labwino kwambiri ndikuchita kuti ndisamawoneke ngati mnyamata kwa ena, koma chifukwa ndili ndikudzimva kuti ndine munthu womaliza! Ndikuyamba kukula tsitsi m'malo omwe ndimameta pamene wometa wanga anandiuza nthawi yotsiriza yomwe ndinali! Kodi mungakhulupirire?
4. Ndimakonda kukhala ndi nthawi yochuluka ndi amayi akukambirana zinthu kusiyana ndi anyamata komanso kumangoganizira. Ndikufuna kuti ndikhale ndi nthawi yochepa yokhala ndi chiwerengero cha amuna, akazi, ndi zokambirana komanso kuti ndituluke ndikuchita zinthu zambiri, ndikucheza nawo ndi amuna omwe amandichititsa mantha. Ndikonzekera kugula handgun ndikupita kukawombera mfuti ndi anthu angapo omwe ndimagwira nawo ntchito nthawi zambiri. Mmodzi wa iwo ndi vet wankhondo wakale amene wapereka kuti andiphunzitse njira zothetsera nkhondo. Zosangalatsa kwambiri.
5. Ndikuphunzira kulola amuna ena kukhala amuna, nawonso. Waulemu kuposa ine. Kuvomereza kuti ndine mnyamata osati mtsikana. Nthawi zambiri ndimadzipeza ndikuthamangira kukadzudzula zoyeserera zamwamuna, malingaliro ake achimwemwe, ndi zina zotero ndikutchinjiriza kunyenga kwa amayi kapena kudzidalira paukadaulo. Ndikuletsa izi ndikuyamba kuzindikira amuna m'malo mwa akazi.

Chiyambi pang'ono kwa iwo omwe amasamala: Chifukwa chake, apa ndi pomwe ndimachokera. Moyo wanga wonse ndakhala ndikumverera mkati ngati mkazi kuposa mwamuna. Ndipo kulipirira izi ndanamizira kudziko lakunja mawonekedwe akunja. Ndimavala zovala zankhondo, ndimasalaza kwambiri, ndipo ndimangoyesa kuwoneka wolimba kuti anthu asasokoneze nane. Ndimachokera kuubwana komwe amayi anga ankandilamulira mwamphamvu, mwakuthupi, pogonana, komanso m'maganizo. Ndinalibe malire nditachoka kupatula mawonekedwe opanda tanthauzo omwe ngati wina atakankhidwa akhoza kugwa ngati mudzi wamatope.

Mu 2011 zinthu zidasintha. Ndapanga masitepe oyamba ku NOFAP. Chaka chino ndakhala ndikudzipereka kwambiri. Kuyambira koyambirira kwa chaka chino ndidakhala ndi masiku a 150-day kenako kubwereranso kwamasiku awiri, 93 day streak ndikubwereranso kokasamba mtengo (osafunsa), ndipo tsopano ndili masiku a 22.

Komabe, ndine wokondwa kwambiri ndi zosintha zomwe zikubwera pa ine, ndipo palibe izi zomwe zingachitike popanda NOFAP.

[Izi zisanachitike] TL; DR - masiku 90 amatanthauza zochepa kwambiri. Kwa ine, yakhala miyezi 3 yoyipa. Ena a inu mukupita patsogolo kwambiri, koma ndine m'modzi mwa ochepa omwe akuwoneka kuti sanawadabulepo. Komabe. Pansipa pali njira zingapo zomwe zandithandizira kuchira, ndipo pambuyo pake mwachidule chifukwa chake masiku 90 ngati chizindikiro cha chiyembekezo sagwiranso ntchito.

Pokhala pano masiku 90, ndikadapumira. Komabe, m'miyezi itatu yapitayi ndidawerenga ma pangano okwanira anzathu akubwereranso patadutsa masiku awo a 90, ndikudziwa kuti chochitika chachikulu ichi ndikungokhala chinthu chakuya kuposa masiku 90.

Koma masiku 90 amandipangitsa kuti ndiyime kaye ndikulingalira chifukwa chomwe ndidabwerera kuno. Ndakhalapo pamayendedwe kale. Masiku anayi 60, tsiku limodzi la 150, ndipo tsopano tsiku langa lachiwiri 90. Streaks sanandithandizepo. Ngati zili choncho, amandipangitsa kukhala ndi nkhawa komanso kusakhazikika. Ndikutanthauza, nditayandikira kwambiri, ndimangoganiza mwa ine ndekha, "Ndikukhulupirira sindiziponyera; Ndikukhulupirira sindizitulutsa ... ”Kuyang'ana chingwe yandisokoneza kuti ndisamangoganizira zomwe zimafunikira, komanso zomwe zathandizadi:

1. Ndidalonjeza kuti sindidzakhudzanso.
2. Popeza sindinadzikhudzenso, zinali zotani kuyang'ana zolaula?
3. Popeza sindinayang'anenso zolaula kapena kudzigwira ndekha, ndimayenera kupeza zoyipa zina zoti ndichite Osangofuna kudzaza nthawi yopuma, koma kuti muphunzire kuthana ndi mkwiyo, manyazi, chisoni, kupsinjika, kusungulumwa, kusowa thandizo, ndi zina zambiri.
4. Zindikira chifukwa Ndimachita chilichonse mwanjira zitatu izi m'mbuyomu. Ndidayenera kukumba mozama, kupeza mayankho aumwini komanso othandiza, ndikuwamamatira pomwe kuwala konse kumawoneka kuzima. Mwachitsanzo, “bwanji osadzikhudza?” Anandikakamiza kuti ndipite kukafufuza chifukwa chake ndimakhala ndi PMO'd komanso ngati ndiyenera kuyimitsa. Izi zidandipangitsa kukhala ndi nzeru zatsopano mwa ine, ndikukhazikitsa mfundo m'malo modalira zomwe ena mwa anthu omwe ndidayandikira kwambiri pamoyo wanga adandiuza za ine kwa zaka 30 (makolo ozunza komanso chibwenzi).

Zina mwazidziwitso zazikulu ndi:

1. Ndinazindikira kuti choyambitsa changa chachikulu chinali 'zotengeka zosafunikira' (ngakhale palibe zomwe zili zosafunikira kwenikweni). Ndinazindikira kuti ndimagwiritsa ntchito PMO ngati mankhwala kuthawa mavuto ndikukhala wovutitsidwa. Ndili mwana, ndinkazunzidwa. Zinali zoyipa. Ndidakumana ndi zovuta zina. M'zaka 30 zikubwerazi, ndi anthu ochepa okha omwe adakhalapo ndi chifundo ndi chisoni kuti athe kundifikira ndikundikhulupirira, ndipo m'modzi wa iwo adandikhulupirira.
2. Izi zikutanthauza kuti, ndinatembenukira kwa PMO chifukwa ndi chinthu chokha chomwe chimamva bwino m'moyo wanga, ndipo palibe amene adandiphunzitsapo kusamalira zakukhosi kwanga, zomwe ndidakumana nazo, kuti ndiyenera kudzisamalira kapena kundichitira zinthu zabwino , komanso makamaka momwe ndingakwaniritsire kuthana ndi malingaliro anga ndi moyo wanga pomwe zosintha zosayembekezereka zimandidabwitsa.
3. Ndazindikira kuti ndili ndi vuto lalikulu ndikufuna kukhala wofunidwa komanso ndikufuna kukonza anthu osweka, mmalo mongopeza zinthu zofunika komanso monga ine ndi inemwini, ndipo izi zandiika pachifundo chaanthu ena oopsa.
4. Ndidazindikira nditawerenga buku la Oliver James "Amakukondani" kuti zonse zomwe ndachita zomwe zimawoneka zomvetsa chisoni zimaphunzitsidwa. Podziwa kuti si vuto langa ndimamva kuwawa makolo anga akanditaya, kuti sikulakwa kwanga kuti ndimadandaula kuti ndimaponderezedwa pazisankho zomwe ndili ndi liwu, kuti si vuto langa makolo anga andichititsa manyazi chifukwa chopeza zinthu kuchokera kwa iwo kuyambira ubwana… zandithandiza kuchepetsa manyazi pazinthu. Makolo anga adandipweteka ndikukula ndikundizunza komanso osandipatsa zomwe ndimafunikira, ndipo ndikakweza mawu ndikutsutsa kapena kundimvera chisoni, adandiuza kuti mwina ndine wopanduka komanso wa satana, kapena kuti ndine nyongolotsi yosautsa. Kupangitsa mwana kumva kuwawa chifukwa chomupangitsa kuti amve chisoni kunandipangitsa kuti ndiyambe kudziukira. Ndi zomwe PMO ali. Zimadziukira ndekha. Zimasokoneza malingaliro anga m'malo mowafotokozera molimba mtima ngakhale amandizunza komanso akukumana ndi mantha. Ndinayenera kusintha momwe ndimawonera momwe ndimamvera komanso cholinga changa pamoyo - kuti ndiwabwezeretse ndikukhalanso athanzi.

Ndalemba zambiri apa, chifukwa chake sindiyenera kunena zochulukirapo, kupatula:

Kumbukirani kuti masiku a 90 amangokhala chizindikiro. Ndichoncho. Sizitanthauza kuti sindidzabwereranso mawa kapena lero, ndipo zowona kuti zoyipa sizitanthauza kuti mukakhala oyera mukadzafika kuno. Ndingakhale ndikulakwitsa, koma ndikuganiza kuti malingaliro onsewa a masiku 90 a voodoo amachokera mu nkhani ya 2005 mu Time Magazine yolembedwa ndi JHU ndi DHHS pomwe wofufuza yemwe MRI idachira omwe adayamba kumwa mankhwalawa adanenanso kuti patatha masiku 90, omwe anali Kuledzera kwa mankhwala osokoneza bongo monga mescaline, cocaine, heroine, ndi zina zotero zinali zotheka kuti azikhala oyela okha. Masiku 90 amenewo anali nthawi yocheperako pomwe powerengera chipatala chokhoza kumasula makasitomala ndi chiyembekezo m'malo mokhumudwa. Zomwe wofufuzirayo adatinso ndikuti kusintha kwaubongo m'maphunziro oyesa kunawonetsa kuti patatha miyezi itatu, magwiridwe antchito ku preortal cortex ndi madera ena omwe amakhudzidwa ndi kuwongolera chidwi (zindikirani sindinanene kuti "zomwe mungachite") ndikumverera kwa izo) adakwera pamiyeso yokhazikika yathanzi. Wosokoneza bongo amayenera kupitiliza ndi pulogalamu, koma panthawiyo amamuyesa anachira (zindikirani zomwe zidamuchitikira) kuchokera pakulakalaka, ndipo tsopano wayambanso kuzunzika kapena kusazindikira zomwe zidamupangitsa kukhala m'mavuto otere.

Izi sizitanthauza kuti masiku 90 aliyense wokonda kumwa amakhala oyera. Ndikuganiza kuti manambala ake anali ngati 60-70% azikhala oyera, koma ndiye. Ndipo panali zinthu zina zofunika zomwe zidapitilira phunziroli, nazonso. Choyamba, ofufuzawo sanauze odwala awo za zamatsenga za masiku 90. Opezawo anangoyesetsa kwa masiku 90 osazindikira za bala yayikulu yomwe amayenera kuyiyendetsa. Izi zathandiza omwe amapeza ndalama kuti asamangoganizira za nambala kapena baji, koma momwe angayendetsere zikhumbo, momwe angayendetsere zikhumbo m'njira zabwino, momwe angachitire ndi zoopsa zakale osagwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo, komanso momwe angayambire kudziona ngati anthu opindulitsa mwa zina.

Limodzi mwabodza lalikulu lomwe ndakhulupirira ndikuti masiku 90 amatanthauza kuti ndilibe PMO. Ayi. Ndiyenera kukhala wopanda PMO masiku 90. Ndi njira ina yozungulira. Kudziletsa sikuthandiza kokha. Ndiyeneranso kuziphatikiza ndikuganiza za moyo wanga, inenso. Zomwe ndimagunda masiku a 90 sizitanthauza kanthu, chifukwa ndikudziwa malire ndipo salinso cholowera chenicheni. Ubongo wanga ukupezabe bwino, koma sindikudziwa kuti ndidzabwezeretsanso liti. Ndipo ngakhale nditatero, ndili ndi zoyipa zoti ndigwirebe komabe ... zabwino.

Chifukwa chake, ngati pali chinthu chimodzi chomwe ndingakusiyireni, osadalira masiku 90 ngati njira yothetsera vutoli. Ndikutsimikiza ngati zoyipa sizili. Ndikufuna ku. Dzulo ndinapita kukakondwerera ndi mzanga ndi mchimwene wake. Koma chowonadi ndikuti ndikukondwerera kuphunzira njira zatsopano zopezera moyo ndi moyo, m'malo mongokhalira kudzitama nthawi zonse.

Zabwino zonse. NOFAP ya moyo.

LINK - Post ya Masiku a 90

by fapstronaut85

PEZANI mphamvu yochuluka kuchokera ku NOFAP…