Izi zakhala zovutirapo kuposa kusiyana kulikonse komwe ndakhala ndikupirira. Kwenikweni, ndinayamba kujambula zolaula ndili ndi zaka 11. Ndine wazaka za 30 pakadali pano. Sindinakhalepo ndi vuto kupeza amayi koma zinali kuphatikiza kwa zolaula, zongopeka, zibwenzi pa intaneti komanso zibwenzi zingapo zomwe sizimandikwaniritsa zauzimu, zachuma, kapena kupanga munthu wabwinobwino.
Ndakhala nthawi zonse ndikumakhala azimayi. Ndinali mwana wakhanda wokula. Nthawi zonse ndimakhala ndi chipewa paphewa mwanga ndipo ngakhale ndidayamba kulimbitsa thupi ndili 14 ndikusintha thupi langa lomwe ndidali nalo nthawi zonse kuti ndiyenera kudzitsimikizira ndilingaliro la dziko lapansi. Ngakhale abwenzi, abale ndi akazi amawona munthu wina, nthawi zonse ndimasamala za zomwe ena amandiganizira.
Kwenikweni ndili wamng'ono kwambiri ndinganene kuti 8 kapena 9 Ndinayamba kuyesa kupanga ndi kukhudza ndi zina zogonana koma sindinathe mpaka nditakhala 11 ndekha. Kotero ine ndinali wotsitsimutsidwa wokonda kugonana. Ndinachokera kubanja lomwe silinawonetsane chikondi m'banja lawo ndipo sananene kuti ndimakukondani wina ndi mnzake. Ichi ndichifukwa chake ndimaganiziranso kuti ndimavutika kuyang'ana akazi ngati anthu.
Ndinagonana pomwe ndinali 16 ndipo ndinali ndimantha nawo pakadutsa zaka. Ndakhalapo ndi azimayi opitilira 300 ndipo sindinatengepo nthawi yowadziwa pokhapokha ngati ndizigona nawo. Anthu a 75 peresenti anali akungodzigudubuza ndi maubwenzi ena okhalitsa.
Zithunzi zolaula zomwe ndimayang'ana zinali zolaula ngakhale sindinkafuna kugona nawo zomwe banja lomwe ndidachita lidakwera mpaka pomwe ndidayamba kufunsa za amuna kapena akazi anga. Ngati ndikadafunanso kukhala mnyamata. Nditadula zolaula masiku 130 apitawo ndikuyesera nofap ndikadakhalabe ndi zikhumbo zazikulu. Sizinali mpaka posachedwa pomwe ndinakhala pachibwenzi ndi munthu wina yemwe ndinafotokozera zonse kuti timvetsetse.
Sindinadutse masiku atatu osapumula zaka 3. Tsopano ndili patsiku lachisanu ndi chitatu. Ndakhala ndikuwongolera komwe ndimamva kuti ndizodabwitsa kwambiri malingaliro ndi malingaliro olakwika apita. Izi zinayamba kutha kuzungulira tsiku la 12. Sindikulakalaka kuti ndikhale mkazi nayenso. Ndikuganiza kuti zambiri zimakhudzana ndi zolaula zomwe mumayang'ana komanso nthawi iliyonse mukakhala ndi vuto lokhazikika.
Kwa nthawi yoyamba munthawi yayitali ndimangoyamba kupeza "Icho". Kudziyang'anira wekha ndikuyenera kukhala wolamulira. Zachidziwikire kuti mutha kukhala ngati wina aliyense ndipo musayese kudzikonza nokha ndikukhala munthu wabwinopo womasuka ndi omwe muli ndikudzikonzekeretsa kuti mukhale ndi moyo wabwino. Kapenanso mutha kuyang'anizana ndi ziwanda zanu osagwiritsa ntchito zifukwa ndikuloza anthu mlandu momwe muli komanso zomwe mukukhala. Kupita ku gehena mtheradi nthawi zina kumakhala njira yokhayo yomwe anthu amasinthira njira zawo. Ena amaphunzira ndipo ena samatero.
Ndikulemba izi patsiku 8 ndimamverera ngati munthu wosiyana kotheratu. Sindikufunanso kuyambiranso m'moyo wanga. Nthawi iliyonse yomwe timakhala tikutaya michere komanso mphamvu zopezera mphamvu. Zomwe amayi ndi abambo amakopeka nanu mwadzidzidzi sizosiyana ndiye mukalimbikitsidwa ndi wina wamphamvu. Muli ndi mphamvu zomwe mumapereka ngakhale simukuyankhula zomwe anthu amakonda. Ndife nyama zonse ndipo timagwira ntchito mosazindikira. Amayi ambiri amati ndi kuchita zomwezo akamapeza winawake wokongola. Menyetsa maso awo, santhula nkhope ndi thupi, kuseka zoyipa zomwe sizoseketsa ndipo inde nenani zoyipa zomwezo mukakhala nawo pabedi ndipo safuna kuti muziganiza kuti ndi mahule.
Kukhala ndi chidziwitso chotere ndi iwo mwanjira imeneyi sikunandisiye kumva kuti ndakwanitsa kuchita bwino kwambiri. Komabe, mukamakula ndikumaphunzira pazolakwika zanu mumapezeka kuti mukuphunzira kanthu kapena ziwiri za anthu wamba. Tonsefe tili ndi zolimbikitsa ndipo tonsefe tili ndi zokhumba. Tsopano tikukhala m'dziko lomwe tidagula mbedza ndi zouluka pazinthu. Amagulitsidwa kwa ife pogwiritsa ntchito chinyengo. Chinyengo chidzakhala pa njira zathu zazikulu zopulumukira. Njala ndi kubereka. Ndizosavuta kuzipereka pazinthu izi ndipo osakayikira koma zimafunikira kulimba mtima kuti ndinene izi zakusokonekera makamaka ngati ndinu bambo woti moyo suyenera kukhala wongogonana.
Ndalimbana ndi hardcore iyi ndipo zidatenga mphindi zingapo za wtf kuti andidzutse. Ubwino wodekha, wozizira komanso weniweni udzabwera. Ingokhalani owona kwa inu nokha ndipo musataye chilichonse chomwe mukufuna pamoyo wanu. Muyenera kukukonzani kaye musanathandizire ena.
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