Kungani ukusetshenziswa kwami ​​kwe-pornography kwanda?

IZIFUNDO: Izimpawu zokulutha umlutha nokukhula kwezinto ezimbi kakhulu? Izifundo ezingaphezu kwe-60 ezibika okutholakele zihambisana nokukhula kokusetshenziswa kocansi (ukubekezela), ukujwayela izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, ngisho nezimpawu zokuhoxiswa (zonke izimpawu nezimpawu ezihlobene nokulutha).

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OKUSHA: “Ngayeka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile lapho ziphazamisa kakhulu"(Chicago Tribune, 2018)

Eminyakeni yokugcina yalomlutha ukunambitheka kwami ​​kwe-porn kwavela. Uqale ukubuka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile zobulili lapho intombazane ishaya, ithuka futhi ifike nomfana onentambo, i-cuckold / ukukopela i-porn, ebibukeka ingenza ngibe nentshisekelo enkulu kwabesifazane abanomyeni / isoka, noma ngabe ebengabukeki kahle , yonke le nto yokukhohlisa yangihlanyisa. Ngisho nohlobo lwe-porn “oluthambile” olunjengama-MILFs lwagcina lungenza ngakhanga kakhulu kubantu besifazane asebekhulile ababenezingane, okwangenza ngafuna ukukhipha umama engifunda nabo ekilasini, othisha. Namanje ukwenza idama.

Indoda ethandekayo, angikaze ngicabange ukuthi i-porn ingakwenza lokho, ngangingenjalo lapho ngisemncane, ngaphambi kocansi, ngangicabanga ngocansi oluvamile, ngazizwa ngikhangwa kunoma iyiphi intombazane enhle. Ngilokhu ngizama ukubheka emuva ngibone ukuthi izinto zihambe kanjani kulo mgwaqo nginganakile. Manje nangemuva kokuwumisa ngisenokuthile ngabesifazane abangikhahlela emabhola, bangishaye futhi bangithinte ngomunwe. Nginesiqiniseko sokuthi i-PIED yami izokwelashwa… kepha ingabe zonke lezo zingane engizikhulisile ziyohlala ziyingqondo yami? Permalink

Abasebenzisi be-porn abathintekayo bavame ukuchaza ukukhula kwesimo sabo sokusebenzisa i-porn esithatha isikhathi sokubuka isikhathi eside noma ukufuna izinhlobo ezintsha ze-porn. Izinhlobo ezintsha ezenza ukwethuka, ukumangala, ukwephulwa kokulindela noma ukukhathazeka kungasebenza ukwandisa ukuvusa ngocansi, futhi kubasebenzisi be-porn abathintekayo ekukhulekeleni bakhuphuka ngenxa yokusebenzisa ngokweqile, lesi simo sivame kakhulu.

Abacwaningi baseKinsey Institute babephakathi kokuqala ukubika lesi simo. In 2007, baqaphele ukuthi ukuvezwa okuphezulu kwamavidiyo ezithombe zocansi kubonakala kubanga ukwehla kwezocansi nokuzwela kwesidingo sezinto ezeqisayo, ezikhethekile noma ze "kinky" zokuvuswa, kepha azange ziphenye ngokuqhubekayo. Futhi ngo-2007, uNorman Doidge MD wabhala ngokwanda encwadini yakhe Ubuchopho Obushintshayo:

Ubhadane lwamanje lwe-porn lunikeza ukubonisa okusobala ukuthi ukuthanda izinto zocansi kungatholakala. Izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, ezilethwa ukuxhumeka kwe-inthanethi okushesha kakhulu, ziyanelisa zonke izidingo zokuguqulwa kwe-neuroplastic…. Lapho abathwebuli bezithombe zobulili ezingcolile beziqhayisa ngokuthi bacindezela imvilophu ngokwethula izingqikithi ezintsha, ezinzima, abangakusho ukuthi kufanele, ngoba amakhasimende abo akha ukubekezelela okuqukethwe.

Ubuntu bobulili “ukwazi ukusebenza” kakhulu kunalokho ochwepheshe abakubonile. A Ucwaningo lwe-2016 uthole lokho isigamu Abasebenzisi be-porn be-internet base benyukele ezintweni ababezitholile phambilini "ezingathandeki noma ezinengekayo."Imisebenzi yezocansi e-intanethi: Ucwaningo lokuhlolisisa lwemikhakha yokusebenzisa inkinga futhi engekho inkinga kwisampula yamadoda). Ingcaphuno:

Amaphesenti angamashumi amane nesishiyagalolunye akhulume okungenani ngezinye izikhathi efuna okuqukethwe kocansi noma ehilelekile kuma-OSA [porn] ayengazange athandeke kuwo ngaphambilini noma ukuthi ayebhekwa njengento enengekayo.

Lolu cwaningo lwaseBelgium lwathola nokuthi ukusetshenziswa kwe-porn okuyinkinga kwe-Intanethi kwakuhlotshaniswa nomsebenzi owehlisiwe we-erectile futhi kwanciphisa ukwaneliseka okuphelele kwezocansi. Kodwa-ke abasebenzisi be-porn abanenkinga babhekana nezifiso ezinkulu (i-OSA = imisebenzi yezocansi online, eyayiyi-porn ye-99% yezifundo). Kuyathakazelisa ukuthi u-20.3% wabahlanganyeli uthe isizathu esisodwa sokusebenzisa kwabo i-porn "ukugcina ukuvuka nomlingani wami."

Ukusebenzisa izindlela ezahlukene nokuhlola iziqu ze-60 zibika ukutholwa okuhambisana nokukhula kwesisindo se-porn (ukubekezelelana), ukujwayela izithombe ezingcolile, ngisho nezimpawu zokuhoxisa (zonke izimpawu nezimpawu ezihlobene nokulutha).

Isibonelo, lolu cwaningo lwe-2017 luhlakulele futhi luhlolwe inkinga yezinkinga zokusebenzisa izithombe ezingcolile zobulili ezahlonyiswa emva kwemibuzo yokulutha izidakamizwa Ukuthuthukiswa Kwezithombe Zobulili Ezingcolile Zobulili Ezingcolile (PPCS). Ngokungafani nokuhlolwa kwangaphambilini kwezilonda zocansi, le mibuzo enezinto eziyi-18 ihlolwe ukubekezelelana (ukukhuphuka kokusetshenziswa) nokuhoxa, ukuthola kokubili, kuphelisa impikiswano ngokuhoxiswa nokukhuphuka kwabasebenzisi be-porn abavamile. Imibuzo emibili ebisetshenziswa ekunciphiseni ukwanda kokusetshenziswa kocansi:

  • Ngangibheka kancane kancane "izithombe ezingcolile" ezingcolile, ngoba izithombe zobulili ezingcolile engangizibuka ngaphambili zazinganelisekanga kakhulu
  • Nganginomuzwa wokuthi ngidinga izithombe ezingcolile zobulili ezingaphezulu ukuze ngifeze izidingo zami

Ngaphezu kwalokho, lolu cwaningo lwe-2016 lubeka ukungabaza kulowo mcabango wokuthi ukuthanda izinto zocansi kuzinzile maqondana nezithombe zocansi ze-inthanethi (zokusakaza) zanamuhla (Imidiya ecacile ngokocansi Isebenzisa ubulili: Ukuhlaziywa kokuqhathaniswa kwamaGay, abesilisa nabesilisa nabesilisa abesilisa nabesifazane base-United States). Umbhalo ovela kulolu cwaningo:

Lokhu okutholakele kuphinde kwabonisa ukuthi amadoda amaningi abheka okuqukethwe kwezocansi (SEM) okungahambisani nobunikazi babo obucacisiwe. Kwakungavamile ukuthi amadoda ahlonishwe ngokobulili obuhlukile abike ukuthi abuka i-SEM equkethe ukuziphatha kwabesilisa bobulili obufanayo (20.7%) nakwabesilisa abaziwa ngobungqingili ukuthi babike ukubuka ukuziphatha kwabantu bobulili obufanayo ku-SEM (55.0%).

Lesi sifundo, sithathwe kanye ezinye izifundo kuleli khasi, debunks the meme ukuthi abasebenzisi be-porn banamuhla ekugcineni "thola ubulili babo beqiniso”Ngokusesha izingosi ezinamashubhu, bese unamathela ohlotsheni olulodwa kuphela lwe-porn sonke isikhathi.

Abacwaningi baseCambridge University baqinisekisile ukuthi ubuchopho babasebenzisi be-porn abanenkinga bajwayele ezithombeni ngokushesha kunokulawula futhi bavuswa kakhulu yimifanekiso yenoveli. Ngakho-ke uma usukhuphukele ekuthatheni izithombe zobulili ezingcolile ezikumangazayo, awuwedwa, futhi kungenzeka ukuthi akuyona inkomba yokuthi "ungubani" ngokocansi - ngaphandle komsebenzisi we-porn ovuthiwe onesithukuthezi. Leli khasi linezibonelo ezingamakhulu (ngezansi) zabafana abayeka izithombe zobulili ezingcolile futhi babona izithukuthuku zabo ezenziwa ngocansi zikhuphuka.

Kukhona namafasitela abucayi entuthuko, lapho ososeshini bafaka izintambo “ngokujulile” (futhi bakhombise inkani enkulu ukushintsha). Amanye amawindi asebuntwaneni, lapho ezinye izinhlangano ziba izinkumbulo ezisobala (ezingazi). Isibonelo, uma ukushaya ngandlela thile kubangele impendulo evusa inkanuko, kubekwa isisekelo esithile. Udokotela wezifo zengqondo uNorman Doidge uxoxa ngalesi sibonelo esahlukweni sakhe esihle kakhulu ngeplastiki yezocansi, Isahluko esigcwele, kusukela encwadini yakhe Ubuchopho Obushintshayo. Muva nje, i-Doidge wabhala:

"Siphakathi kwenguquko kwezokuthanda ezocansi nezothando ngokungafani neminye emlandweni, kwenziwa ucwaningo kwezenhlalo ezinganeni nasentsheni… Lokho odokotela abangazi kakhulu ngakho, nokho, ukuthi sizoyisiza kanjani intsha, enocansi Ukuthanda kuthonywa yi-porn, ngoba leli zinga lokuvezwa kocansi lisha sha. Ngabe la mathonya nokuthanda izinto kuzophenduka kube okokuzenzisa? Noma ingabe lezi zimo ezintsha zobulili ezingcolile zizozishutheka ngokujulile ngoba iminyaka yobusha iseyinkathi yokukhula? ”

Abanye abacwaningi baphinde balinganisa le nqubo yokukhuphuka lapho izithombe ze-porn ezitholakala kabanzi. Omunye ubhala:

Yini engacatshangelwa ukuthi isisekelo sokuthi ukuvezwa kwabantu abasha njalo (okungukuthi, ikakhulukazi abafundi ngonyaka wabo wokuqala wekolishi) ukuthola i-eerotica kalula, ecacile nangokomfanekiso, kodwa ngaphandle kokuphoqeleka, kukhuthaza ukubhekana nokucindezeleka okusheshayo okunjengokuzizwa benecala , ukugxekwa, nokuhlambalaza, nokuthuthukiswa ngokulingana okusheshayo kokusabela okungathintwa kokuzijabulisa. Ukuvezwa isikhathi eside kuholela ekusebenzeni kokuzijabulisa, kodwa. Injabulo isinciphisa ngenxa yalokho, futhi ukusetshenziswa kwezinto zokufunda (okungukuthi, i-erotica ebonisa ukuziphatha okungavamile kobulili) kuyadingeka ukuze kugcinwe ukusabela kokuthokozisa okunamandla.

Manje kungani lokhu kwenzeka? Kubonakala sengathi ukusakaza izithombe zobulili ezingcolile yilokho ososayensi abakubiza ngokuthi “isisusa esingajwayelekile.” Lokho wukuthi, ubuchopho bethu abuzange buguquke ngalokhu kukhuthazeka okungaka, ngakho-ke akujwayelwanga nakho. "Bazivikela" ngokungaphenduli kangako enjabulweni, okusho ukuthi i-intanethi ye-intanethi, ngokudabukisayo, ayanelisi ngokuhamba kwesikhathi (kwabanye abasebenzisi). Ukungeneliseki okungapheli bese kuqhuba ukusesha kokukhuthaza okukhulu, njengoba umsebenzisi efuna ukuthakazelisa okwedlulele. Okubi kakhulu, ukukhathazeka kubuye kuvuse ukuvuswa kocansi, ngakho-ke ukwenza izinto eziyingozi kuba ukuvula, okungaholela kumjikelezo wokuzilimaza lapho abanye abasebenzisi beqhutshwa khona ukuba benze imidlalo yabo yezocansi empilweni yangempela ngomzamo wokuklwebheka kwabo . Funda indaba yomuntu oyedwa.

Futhi, yebo, kuvame ukwenzeka ukuguqula lezi zingane ezenziwe ngocansi. Bheka Ingabe ama-fetish ami ayenziwa-amahlaya? Kodwa kungathatha isikhathi eside kunalokho ucabanga ukuthi kuzokwenza. Lesi sihloko sichaza kabanzi: Kungani Ngithola I-Porn Ebaluleke Kakhulu Kunokuba Ngumlingani?

Ukunyuka kwemiphumela kubangelwa ukujwayela noma ukukhishwa kwesisusa. Mhlawumbe kokubili. Ukuzijwayeza kuyinto ukwehla okwesikhashana noma ukuphela kwe-dopamine ukukhululwa ngokuphendula okukodwa okufisayo. Lena inqubo evamile futhi ingashintsha umzuzwana kuze kube mzuzu. Ukuzijwayeza kubangela abasebenzisi be-porn ukuba bafune intsha futhi ngaleyo ndlela babe izinhlobo ezintsha.

Ukungahlehlisi libhekisela ekushintsheni kobuchopho besikhathi eside nesimo samakhemikhali okungathatha izinyanga ukuya eminyakeni ukuthuthukisa, futhi isikhathi eside ukuguqula. Phakathi kwezinye izinguquko, i-dopamine ne-opioids yehla, njengamanye ama-receptor athile kanye nama-receptor opioid. Lokhu kushiya umuntu kancane ukuzwela injabulo, futhi kuvame ukukhombisa ukuthi kuyadingeka ukugqugquzela okukhulu nakakhulu ukufeza i-buzz efanayo ('ukubekezela'). Nakuba ukulutha umlutha kuhilela ukungafuneki, ubuchopho buyashintsha ngemuva kokuhlehlisa izinkinga ngaphandle umuntu obhekene nokulutha okugcwele (eziningana neurological Ucwaningo lubika ukungafuneki / ukujwayela abasebenzisi be-porn: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8.).

Ukuzihlaziya kanye nokujwayele ukugqugquzela abasebenzisi be-porn ukuthi bafune izinhlobo ezintsha, ngezinye izikhathi zikhuni futhi zingaboni, noma ziphazamise. Njengoba nje umsebenzisi wezidakamizwa udinga izinto eziningi ukuze aphakame (njengeyakhe umvuzo wesifunda uyakhula inombolo), abasebenzisi be-porn banamuhla be-Intanethi bangathola ukuthi badinga amavidiyo amaningi, noma amavidiyo we-kinkier, noma i-porn engokoqobo engokoqobo, noma ingxoxo ebukhoma, noma abalingisa, noma izinto ezingekho emthethweni ukuze uthole i-buzz ubuchopho babo bufuna ngobuqotho.

Akuyona nje eyezocansi Intsha lokho kuvuselela uhlelo lwethu lomvuzo. I-Dopamine ivutha eminye imizwelo kanye nesisusa, konke okuvame ukubukeka ngokuphawulekayo uma usebenzisa i-intanethi ye-intanethi:

Ukwehliswa kwenhliziyo, nokubekezelelana, kwenzeka ngoba i-porn yanamuhla ye-Intanethi iyi okunye okuvusa amadlingozi futhi luningi kunanoma yikuphi ubuchopho bomuntu obhekene nakho kuyo yonke imvelo. I-Southpark wenza umsebenzi omkhulu wokuwuthola lesi siqephu. Ngezansi kunezibonelo ezimbalwa zokubekezelelana okubikwe ngamalungu esayithi. Kwezinye izimo, lo mkhuba ubonakala kuphela lapho i- ukungabikho kokugqugquzela ngokweqile isikhathi esilungisa inkinga. Lo mfana uthatha ngempela into:

Ndoda ngikhishwe kakhulu njengamanje. Kubonakala sengathi angiziyekisi. Ngake ngaba umlutha wezithombe zocansi futhi ngakwazi ukuyeka .. cishe izinyanga ze-3. Lokhu kukhule ngokuhamba kweminyaka kusuka kwabaneminyaka eyi-12 ngandlela thile;

  • Izitho zangaphansi zangaphansi
  • Amamodeli ama-nude
  • Ubulili obuyisisekelo ku-porn
  • BJ
  • Anal
  • Ama-Gangbangs
  • Ukulawulwa kwamadoda abesifazane
  • Femdom
  • Feet
  • U-Femdom ngezinhlungu
  • U-Femdom unomuzwa wokuzizwa ngokomzwelo

Ngibe sengithola izinkundla zezintombi / amaFacebook. Ngangivame ukucabanga ukuthi kubi ukubuka i-porn amahora we-4. Kusukela ezinyangeni ze-6/7 ezedlule okungenani ama-4 noma ama-5 izikhathi bengikhuphuke KONKE NIGHT, sikhuluma ngamahora we-12 + lapha. Ngisanda kuqeda iseshini yamahora ama-5 yosizi. Futhi futhi ubuchopho bami buzizwa buhlukumezeka kakhulu ngakho. Ngizizwa nginamahloni futhi nginamahloni emphakathini futhi ngikhathazekile njengoba ungakholelwa.

Njalo lapho ngisebenzisa kabi i-porn ithola umthunzi omncane ngokwedlulele. Ngichithe isikhathi sami sokugcina ngicabanga ngemisebenzi yobungqingili esimeni sokuphoqelelwa kwabesifazane. Manje sengibuyiselwe kokujwayelekile ngemuva kwe-orgasm, ngizizwa nginengekile ngokuphelele. Lokhu akuyona into engingaze ngiyithole ikhanga emhlabeni wangempela, engqondweni yami efanele! Nginenkinga enkulu kanzima yokwephula umjikelezo, le ukuphela kwendawo engingabhala kuyo lokhu.

Uma ukusebenzisa i-porn kuye kwehlisa ukuthanda kwakho kobulili, bheka:

Nayi i- “Ukubekezela ”PDF equkethe eziningi zalezi zindaba.

Nginezinsuku ze-14 ngaphandle kwe-PMO, futhi ngenxa yalokho, ngithola kulula ukuvuswa kaningi. Izithombe zobulili ezingcolile zonakalise impela ikhono lami lokuvuswa yinoma yini ngaphandle kwabesifazane ababukeka kakhulu bokuzenzisa abanokuziphatha okubi kakhulu kocansi. Njengoba manje ngivuswa ngabesifazane abaningi ezimweni ezijwayelekile, kukhona okwenzekayo ebengingakulindele: Ngizizwa ngikhanga ngokwengeziwe. Ngicabanga ukuthi uma bengingavuswa kuphela yimifanekiso ebukekayo, khona-ke ukucabanga kwami ​​ukuthi abesimame bangathola abesilisa abathandekayo kakhulu, abenzi bokufakelwa abakhangayo.

Njengoba sengikhangwa kakhulu yizimo ezijwayelekile, sengiqala ukukholelwa ukuthi kungenzeka ukuthi bakhangwe yimi yize ngingafani noFabio. Ngamanye amagama, lapho bengingakhangi, ngicabanga ukuthi abadonsanga. Manje njengoba sengikhona, kulula ukukholelwa ukuthi nabo bakhona.

Ngonyaka odlule inani lezingcingo / i-orgasm elenziwe ngocansi lidlulile ophahleni, kulinganiselwa i-2x ngosuku, nsuku zonke, kwesinye isikhathi kuze kufike ku-4 noma ku-5x. Ngemuva kwalokho ngabona ukuthi angikwazi ukubamba ukwakhiwa kwami ​​ngenkathi ngenza uthando nomkami ... kubi.

Ngomagazini i-porn kwakuyizikhathi ezimbalwa ngesonto futhi ngangikwazi ukuyilawula ngokuyisisekelo. ICos bekungeyona leyo 'ekhethekile' ngempela. Kepha lapho ngingena ezweni elingcolile le-inthanethi ye-porn, ubuchopho bami babuthole okuthile ebikufuna ngokweqile…. Bengingalawuleki kungakapheli izinyanga eziyisithupha. Iminyaka yama-mags, azikho izinkinga. Izinyanga ezimbalwa zocansi oluku-inthanethi… ziluthekile.

Ngishaya indlwabu futhi ngibheka izithombe ezingcolile ngangokunokwenzeka esikoleni esiphakeme. Ukugxuma okukhulu okulandelayo ekuluthweni kwafika ne-Intanethi. Cishe ngo-1993, ngathola i-Inthanethi ngemodemu engama-2400 bps. Akuzange kuthathe isikhathi eside ukuthola ukuthi ngingazibuka kanjani zonke izithombe zobulili ezingcolile engingazifuna. Kuqale ngezithombe nje. Ngithathe isikhathi eside ukuthola izithombe kuma-2400 bps kepha ngizohlala kuze kube sebusuku kakhulu. Amahora namahora okulanda izithombe. Ayikwazanga ukuthola okwanele. Zonke izinhlobo zemifanekiso. Lapho ubona okwengeziwe kulapho ufuna ukubona khona. Ukucaciswa okuningi, kuyamangaza ngokwengeziwe. Okuningi. Okuningi. Okuningi. Yilokho kuphela ubuchopho obufunayo uma usujule kangako.

Ngibe sengithola imodemu engu-56k. Yeka udumo! Ngathola izithombe ngokushesha okukhulu manje kwakumnandi. I-56k ibingafiki ngesikhathi esingcono. Izimangaliso zezimanga, amasayithi aqala ukunikela ngeziqeshana zamahhala. Imizuzwana emi-3 kuya kwengu-10 ubude. Hawu babemangalisa kanjani. Ngibe nemifanekiso eyi-1000s kanye neziqeshana ezingama-100 ngaphambi kokuthi iWindows 98 iphume. Lokhu bekuyinto yansuku zonke, ngangokunokwenzeka.Ngempela, izinto zivumelanisiwe futhi; amawindows 98 kanye nezivumelwano ezintsha ku-56k zenze ukuthi uxhumano lulandwe kabili ngokushesha okukhulu. Iziqeshana zaba zinde. Ingqondo yami yacabanga, “Lokhu kungcono kakhulu!” Iziqeshana zazingamasekhondi ayi-10 kuye kwangama-30 ubude. Uthole okuningi nokuningi kwalokhu.

Lesi sikhathi sonke ngagxila kwi-porno eningi kakhulu futhi eqinile.

Ngaqhubeka lokhu iminyaka embalwa nje ngenza iziqeshana nama pics. Awusoze wakubona konke. Kwakukhona njalo into entsha futhi eyedlulele kakhulu. Ngangihlale ngifuna izinto ezintsha, nokunye okuningi. I-intanethi yenza ukunikezwa okungapheli. Kwabe sekufika ukufinyelela okusheshayo, iziqeshana ezigcwele zamahhala, izithombe eziphezulu zesikhangiso esiphezulu, nezinto ezingaphezulu kakhulu: ubugqila, isilwane, amadoda namadoda noma ukubuka amadoda nje, bese behlukumeza noma yini eyathatha ukungikhipha. Ngizosho ukuthi angikaze ngibe nezingane ezingcolile. Nakuba bengingazange ngiqale inqubo yokushiya lo mkhuba, ngiyaqiniseka ukuthi ngabe kungenzeka. Lo mcabango uyangihlupha.

Engangikucabanga nge-porn yize ngaleso sikhathi kwakuwukuthi, "Uma kungabantu abadala, akuyona inkinga. Banqume ukwenza lokhu. ” Ngakho-ke angibonanga nkinga ekubukeni noma yini. Lokhu kukhuphuka kwaqhubeka. Ngithole okuthile okusha, okwakumangalisa ngemuva kweminyaka engu-15 + yokusetshenziswa kocansi kwe-Intanethi. Izithombe ezingcolile zobulili ezingcolile. OH WOW! Abesifazane abangaphansi kolawulo lwe-hypnotist benza noma yini abatshelwa yona. Ngobusuku bokuqala, ngangivuke ubusuku bonke - ngempela ubusuku bonke - ukushaya indlwabu ku-orgasm amahora namahora. Angikwazanga ukuthola okwanele kwalezi zinto izinyanga. Ngemuva kwalokho i-biggy. Ngingathola amafomu weseshini ama-Hypnodommes. Ngingalawulwa njengalabo besifazane kumavidiyo. Lokhu kwakumangalisa. Ngilahlekile kumavidiyo we-hypno, izindaba kanye nokuluthwa okungokoqobo kwami. Ekugcineni wangishaya ukuthi ngase ngihambe kakhulu. Ngempela ngiqale ukukhokhela amavidiyo ne-hypnosis. Ngangingakaze ngikwenze lokhu ngaphambili, okungukuthi, ngikhokhele izinto. Lokho ekugcineni kwangenza ngafuna ukululama. (Ngangibuye ngihlushwe ukungasebenzi kahle kwe-erectile… eminyakeni engamashumi amathathu.)

Ingxenye enkulu kakhulu yale nqubo yokulutha umlutha iyindlela eya phezulu kakhulu. Uma ngithi "okuningi," ngiqonde kakhulu konke. Okuningi kwakho. Okweqile ngokweqile. Okuningi nje. Okuningi. Kufanele ube nokuningi. Akukho okunye okuzosiza ngaphandle kokuningi. Inkinga-ke leyo. Ngicabanga ukuthi mhlawumbe impande yokulutha. Awukwazi ukuma lapha noma laphaya. Impela, uyazama. Ngenze kaningi. Nginqume ukungabe ngisaya kulawo masayithi. Ngemuva kwakho konke, nginamavidiyo anele alondoloziwe angidingi ukubuyela emuva. ” Lokho kungahlala usuku noma ezimbili. Omunye umbuzo ebengihlala ngiwubuza uthi, "Kungani ngikubuka lokhu? Kungani ngivulekelwa yilesi senzakalo esiyinqaba? ” Lapho-ke kwakuzofika imicabango ”“ Ngubani onendaba? Ngingakutholaphi okunye? Kungiguqula kakhulu, anginandaba. Ngingakutholaphi nje okunye. ” Kuhlala njalo kuningi, ngaphezulu, ngaphezulu, kungapheli.

Ngicabanga ukuthi ukukhanga kwami ​​okuningi kwabanye besifazane kwaqala ngisemncane ngenxa yomagazini engangichitha amahora namahora ngibheka futhi ngifunda. Ngike ngazama kanye nenye intombazane ngisemncane futhi ngiyayithanda, kodwa angikulangazeleli. Ngemuva kweminyaka eminingi, izithombe eziningi nama-movie kamuva, intshisekelo yami kwabesifazane yakhula yaya ngokuqina yaze yacishe ifane kwabesilisa nabesifazane. Ngemuva kokuhlangenwe nakho kocansi okuningi nokuphila kwangempela nabesifazane ukukhanga kwami ​​kubo kudlula ukukhanga kwami ​​kwabesilisa abaningi kakhulu. Kodwa-ke, ngemuva kweminyaka embalwa yokuhlala nomuntu oyedwa nomyeni wami futhi cishe ngingenazo izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, ngithola ukukhanga kwami ​​kwabesifazane kunciphisa ngenkathi ngisakhanga umyeni wami njengoba ngihlala nginakho.

I-8 eyedlule noma izinyanga eziningi, ngiye ngaqaphela kakhulu ukungakwazi kwami ​​ukulawula ukushaya indlwabu nokusetshenziswa kocansi. Ngibukele okungenani izithombe ze-porn okungenani iminyaka engu-14. Ngingu-33 maduzane. Ngiye ngaphazamiseka ezintweni ezingaphezulu kakhulu, okuningi kwezithombe zobulili ezingcolile zobulili ezithandwayo kamuva nje. Angikhe nakancane ngithandwa yizinsikazi ngaphandle kwezingcolile, futhi uma ngisenqedile, empeleni ngiyanyanyiswa umcabango wayo. Uma kungewona i-pornual shemale, enye ilahlekelwe yi-porn eqondile egcwala abesifazane kuphela ezintweni eziphelele.

Kwakukukhulu ukufunda ezinye zezihloko ezitholakala lapha ezichazayo ukuthi azikhathazi ngempela ukuthi okuqukethwe kuka-porn kuyini, kuyisisusa nje kuphela, nesidingo sezinto ezimbi kakhulu futhi ezingavamile. Ngikhangwa ngabesifazane, kodwa angizange ngizizwele ngokoqobo ngokobulili kubo iminyaka eminingi.

Ngibonile ukuthi isikhashana manje ukuthanda kwami ​​izithombe zobulili ezingcolile bekushintsha ngokushesha. Ekuqaleni kwakuyizithombe ezingcolile zobulili ezivamile, kodwa-ke ngaqala ukukhathazeka ngezocansi ezivamile noma ezivamile. Angikwazi ukugxila kanzima kunoma yini, futhi ngiphinde ngabona ukwehla okukhulu kwe-libido yami. Kulo nyaka kutholakale ukuthi nginesifo sokudangala esimaphakathi kuya kwesingathi sína futhi sengifakwe kule mithi elandelayo. UProzac, uCelexa, uPaxi, nami njengamanje ngiseWelbutrin ejwayelekile yeBupropion. Bengilokhu ngilwa nalokhu kucindezeleka kusukela bengineminyaka eyi-12. Njengamanje ngifaka okungenani ama-5 ngezikhathi ze-6 nsuku zonke.

Ngingowesilisa oneminyaka engu-27 ubudala ongungqingili futhi nginenkolelo eqinile yokuthi angikaze ngibe nokuziphatha okunempilo kwezocansi empilweni yami selokhu ngaphuma (ngineminyaka engama-20). Ngizizwa sengathi ukukhululeka kokusetshenziswa kwe-inthanethi ukuhlangana namadoda noma ukushaya indlwabu ocansini kube nomthelela ekuqondeni kwami ​​ucansi kakhulu kangangokuthi ngizizwa ngilahlekile lapho nginikezwa ithuba lokuba nobudlelwano bobulili obuzuzisayo nobucebisayo. Muva nje, ubudlelwane obude kunabo bonke engake ngabuqeda. Ngangithandana naye, kepha angikwazanga phakathi nabo bonke ubudlelwano ukuzwa ngempela inkanuko yobulili engiyizwayo kokunye ukuhlangana kocansi.

Uma ngicabanga ngakho, angivamile ukuba nomuzwa wokuthi inkanuko yocansi nabalingani abaphindayo. Imvamisa ngijabule kakhulu ngocansi uma kumuntu omusha futhi angibazi, noma imizimba yabo. Ngaphezu kwalokho, nginenkinga enkulu ngokuhlangana nabalingani bami. Ngine-cum kuphela nomunye umuntu ama-6 ama-times, yize ngibe nokuningi kocansi. Lapho ngingedwa, ukuqubuka akuyona inkinga. Ngibuka izithombe ezingcolile kakhulu ukufeza lokhu.

Ngithole i-Internet ye-Internet ku-16 noma kunjalo. Ekuqaleni noma yini engikhiphe yona, kodwa ngokuhamba kwesikhathi ukuthanda kwami ​​kuqala ukucaca ngokwengeziwe iphuzu lokwenza izitshalo. Ngacabanga ukuthi lokhu kwakungumphumela wemvelo wokukhula, hhayi ukuyixhumanisa ne-pornography. Ngaphandle kokubona kwami, kusobala ukuthi kuncike emibonweni yami yenyamakazi negazi abesifazane nokuthi yini eyangivusa. Angikwazi ukuyikholelwa kuze kufike lokhu kuhlolwa kwamuva. Ngesonto lesibili ngaphandle kokuzijabulisa / ukushaya indlwabu ngiqale ukubona ubuso bomama namazwi amaningi. OKWENGEZIWE LOTI. Kungakapheli izinyanga ze-2 kamuva, akusekho ukuthatha izinsana zami zangaphambili ukuze ngithole injabulo. (Wow!) Ukubheka okuthile, i-giggle yilokho engikudingayo.

Ngiyakuzonda ngempela okungisusa. Nginento yabesifazane abakhulu kakhulu… angikhulumi ngabesifazane abanempilo / abajwayelekile abangama-chubby… ngikhuluma ngama-300lbs plus. Bengihlala ngithanda abesifazane abancane abangama-chubby abanamajika, kepha manje, ngithanda kuphela amakhulu kakhulu kubonakala futhi kuyangikhathaza. Ngicabanga ukuthi iminyaka yokubuka izithombe zamantombazane ama-chubby / big butt avele akhula kancane kancane ukuthanda ukuthanda abesifazane abakhuluphele abanezimbongolo ezinkulu.

Kuyahlekisa ngoba abesifazane ababejwayele ukungivula kakhulu ngaphambili abasakwenzi kimi. Ngiphinde ngizithole ngiya ngokuya ngiba namandla lapho "ubuka" khona, ungabambi iqhaza. Ngokusobala akululungele ucansi olunempilo, lapho kufanele ucabange umlingani wakho eshaya omunye umuntu ngaphandle kwakho ukuthola ibhoner. Ngiyakwazi ukubhekana nokuthanda abesifazane abakhuluphele, kepha angisithandi lesi simo se- "voyeur" kancane. Kubukeka njengokuphakade ngoba ukubheka nje izinkanyezi ezijwayelekile zocansi endaweni ejwayelekile ye-porn kwakwanele kimi.

Angizondi izithombe zobulili ezingcolile. Angisoli i-porn ngokwenzekile kimi. Kwakukhona kimi ekupheleni kosuku. Angicabangi ukuthi i-porn kufanele ivinjelwe. Kodwa-ke ngiyavuma ukuthi kunesifiso sami uqobo ukuthi ngingazibukeli izithombe ezingcolile. Akungifanele. Iningi lotshwala olutholile alukwazi ukuthinta isiphuzo, hhayi esisodwa, hhayi isiphuzo. Ngiyafana ne-porn. Kimi, akusikho ukuhamba. Ngiyazi lapho nje nginqamula uthango, kuyisilayidi esibushelelezi sokubuyela ekuluthweni. Uma abanye befuna ukubuka i-porn, kulungile. Akungifanele nje. Inkinga ukuthi, uma uke wahlukumeza okuthile, ukulinganisela mhlawumbe akusiyona inketho yakho.

Into efanayo ingabonisa ubulili:

Kimina bengizothi ngingumuntu othambekele ekulutheni umlutha engimaziyo. Angikaze ngibheme noma ngisebenzise izidakamizwa, futhi isikhathi esiningi sempilo yami angikaze ngisebenzise utshwala noma i-caffeine. Ngicabanga ukuthi i-PMO bekuyindawo yami ebuthakathaka. Ngokubheka emuva, umfana ngangiyisigqila. Futhi angikaze ngikubone. Kuze kube unyaka owedlule, ngaphandle kocansi, umkhuba wami wokushaya indlwabu uzinze ngokulingana okulinganiselwe kabili masonto onke.Uma i-P ingezwa ku-MO, lokhu kuphakamise i-ante ngendlela ephawulekayo yokuthola njengokuphindwe kabili ngosuku. Futhi bekushesha.

Ngicabanga ngalawo magundane axhunywe emshinini wokujikeleza wesifunda, ecindezela isigwedlo aze awe, bese ngiyathuthumela, ngoba lokho kuzwakala sengathi kubhekiswe kuphi.Ngiphinde ngidinga ukuvuma ukuthi iphethini yami yokuvusa inkanuko yayiqhubekele phambili ekuqaleni kubandakanya nokudingayo ukuvuselela i-anal, futhi ngikhuluma nembongolo yami, hhayi eyakhe.

Okokuqala kwaba amathoyizi ase-silicone bese iminwe eminingi, khona-ke isandla sami sonke, ke isibhamu sakhe. Ubani owazi ukuthi lokho kuzobe kuphi? Angisakwazi ukushiya i-orgasm ngaphandle kosizo olunjalo. Njengoba ingqondo iqhuma njengoba lezo zinhlobo ze-orgasms kungenzeka, indlela yokukhuphuka ibonakala sengathi ibalekele ukuqaphela kwami ​​ngokuphelele.

Ngokujabulisayo manje konke sekuwile, futhi indawo ezungeze ingquza yami ilahlekelwe konke ukukhanga. Kubukeka kuyinhlekelele yangempela ukuthi bonke laba bafana abancane bangazenzela i-PMO ngokwabo endaweni lapho bephelelwa khona yi-orgasm nokusebenza kwe-erectile. Ngiyathuthumela lapho ngicabanga ngakho, kepha ngiyabona ukuthi yilapho bengibheke khona. Kwakungithatha kakhulu ukuya ku-orgasm, futhi kwakunzima kakhulu ukwenza i-orgasm ngesikhathi socansi. Ngokubheka emuva izehlakalo zokwehluleka ukuvusa inkanuko ngesikhathi socansi beziqala ukukhula nazo. Angikaze ngiqaphele lezi zimpawu ukuthi ziyini ngempela.