Popanda zotsatira za Coolidge sipadzakhalanso zolaula pa intaneti
Coolidge Effect ndi pulogalamu yakale ya zamoyo yomwe ingagonjetse kukhutira kwanu pang'onopang'ono mukamaliza kugonana ngati pali okwatirana atsopano omwe akupempha kuti aberekedwe. Popanda izi, sipakanakhala zolaula pa intaneti. Njira ya mitsempha iyi imawona mwayi uliwonse watsopano wogonana - kuphatikizapo womwe uli pazenera lanu - ngati mwayi wamtengo wapatali wa majini, ndipo imakukakamizani kuti muchitepo kanthu ndi mankhwala amphamvu a mitsempha.
Kodi chimachitika n’chiyani mukaponya khoswe wamwamuna m’khola ndi khoswe wamkazi wolandira? Choyamba, pamakhala chilakolako chogonana. Kenako, mwamunayo amatopa pang’onopang’ono ndi mkaziyo. Ngakhale akufuna zambiri, watopa nazo. Komabe, m’malo mwa mkazi woyambayo ndi watsopano, ndipo posachedwa ! Mwamunayo amatsitsimuka ndipo amavutika mwamphamvu kuti amupatse feteleza . Mutha kubwereza izi ndi akazi atsopano mpaka atatsala pang’ono kufa ndi kutopa. Asayansi amadziwa kuti izi ndi Coolidge Effect ndipo zawonedwanso mwa akazi.
Dopamine
Khoswe amafunafuna mkazi aliyense watsopano chifukwa cha kuchuluka kwa dopamine (mankhwala amitsempha) muubongo wake. Palibe chachilengedwe chomwe chimatha kutulutsa dopamine yochuluka monga kugonana, chifukwa majini athu amafuna kupita patsogolo kuposa china chilichonse. Kuchuluka kwa dopamine kumalamula khoswe kuti asiye mkazi aliyense wofunitsitsa kubereka.
Dopamine ndiye mankhwala a mitsempha omwe ali kumbuyo kwa chilimbikitso chonse. Popanda ichi sitikanavutika kukwatira, kufunafuna chimaliziro, kapena kudya. Dopamine ikatsika, chilimbikitsocho chimachepa. Dopamine ndiyenso chikole cha zizolowezi zonse. Ubongo wa munthu wokonda chizolowezicho umachepa kuuzindikira , motero, modabwitsa, umaufuna kwambiri.
Kubwerera ku khoswe. Pambuyo pogonana ndi mkazi yemweyo, ma circuitry ake amataya dopamine yochepa. Taganizirani chithunzi chomwe chili pamwambapa. Nthawi yachisanu yomwe khoswe amataya ndi mkazi yemweyo zimamutengera mphindi 17 kuti atuluke. Nthawi yotulutsa umuna imawonjezeka pamene dopamine yotulutsidwa imachepa . Koma ngati apitiliza kusintha kupita ku akazi atsopano, amatha kuchita ntchito yake mwachangu kwambiri nthawi zonse zisanu. Ubongo wake umakonzanso mphamvu zake zamphamvu ndi kutulutsa dopamine mwamphamvu poyankha mnzanu aliyense watsopano. *
Kuphatikizana
Mosiyana ndi makoswe, anthu ndi ogwirizana . Pa avareji, timagwirizana kuti tilere ana pamodzi—ndi kupeza chikhutiro chokwanira m'maukwati athu (mwina). Koma zotsatira za Coolidge zimabisala mwa ife, ndipo zimadzuka pamene ntchito ikulira mokweza mokwanira. Nthawi ina ndinacheza ndi mwamuna wina amene anakulira ku Los Angeles. "Ndinasiya kuwerengera okondana 350," anavomereza, "ndipo ndikuganiza kuti payenera kuti pali vuto lalikulu ndi ine chifukwa nthawi zonse ndinkasiya kuwakonda kwambiri pankhani yogonana. Ena mwa akazi amenewo ndi okongola kwambiri."
Pa nthawi yomwe tinakambirana naye, mkazi wake wachitatu adangomusiya kuti akhale Mfalansa ndipo adakhumudwa. Iye anali atasowa chidwi mwa iye.
Zolaula pa intaneti: Zochitika za Coolidge pa twin turbos
Zolemba pa intaneti zimatha kusokoneza wogwiritsa ntchito mosalekeza. "Okwatirana" amtundu wosatha amasungabe dopamine. Mnyamata wina adazindikira kuti mbedza inali yatsopano.
Ndinatenga zolaula zambiri. Ndimaganiza kuti ndimapeza zosangalatsa zambiri. Koma sindikukumbukira kuti ndimabwerera m'mbuyo. Gawo lokakamiza ndi nyenyezi yatsopano, kanema watsopano, chochitika chatsopano.
Nzosadabwitsa kuti kafukufuku wambiri wogwiritsa ntchito zolaula akuwonetsa kuti makoswe ndi anthu si osiyana kwambiri pankhani yoyankha kuzinthu zatsopano zogonana. Mwachitsanzo, pamene ofufuza aku Australia adawonetsa filimu yomweyo yogonana mobwerezabwereza, kuyesa mbolo ya anthu omwe adawagwiritsa ntchito komanso malipoti aumwini onse adawonetsa kuchepa pang'onopang'ono kwa chilakolako chogonana. "Kale lomwelo" limangosasangalatsa (chizolowezi, chomwe chimasonyeza kuchepa kwa dopamine).
Pambuyo poonera maulendo 18—pamene anthu omwe amayesedwa anali kugwedeza mutu—ofufuza adayambitsa nkhani zatsopano zokhudza kugonana kwa amuna pa 19 ndi 20. Bingo ! Anthu omwe adayesedwawo ndi mbolo zawo adatchuka. (Inde, akazi adawonetsa zotsatira zofanana .)
Asayansi aphunziranso kuti kuseweretsa maliseche ndi katswiri wa zolaula kumawonjezera kuchuluka kwa umuna ndi umuna woyenda (poyerekeza ndi kuseweretsa maliseche ndi wochita sewero wodziwika bwino). Komanso, nthawi yomwe idatenga kuti umuna utuluke idachepa kwambiri. Mwachidule, zachilendo zogonana zimasintha kukhala umuna wobereka komanso kutulutsa umuna mwachangu, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti "zolumikizirana zilizonse zowonjezera" zikhale zogwira mtima, komanso zodula kwambiri.
Novel kugonana
Zotsatira za Coolidge zimatchulidwanso ngati ntchito yayikulu yopezera mphotho mukamakumana ndi mnzanu watsopano wogonana naye. Dopamine imakula kwambiri pa chilichonse chatsopano—makamaka ngati ndi chogonana. Kafukufuku amatsimikizira kuyembekezera mphotho ndi zachilendo kumakulitsana kuti kuwonjezere chisangalalo ndikukonzanso ubongo wa limbic. Gawo loyambirira la ubongo silisamala ngati mwakhala mukugonana kokwanira; limafuna zotsatira za majini. Mwachitsanzo, Sooty, nkhumba yamphongo ya Guinea , adalowa m'khola la akazi makumi awiri ndi anayi. Kwa masiku angapo atagwidwa, adagwidwa ndi nkhanza. (Kafukufuku pa makoswe ena akuwonetsa kuti kuchira kwathunthu kwa ubongo kumatenga masiku pafupifupi asanu ndi awiri , ndipo kafukufuku pa anthu akuwonetsanso kuzungulira kwa kutulutsa umuna kwa masiku osachepera asanu ndi awiri.)
Mitundu ya Sooty inali yosangalala ngakhale; anabala nkhumba zazing'ono 42. Mwayi woterowo kale unali wosowa kwa amuna amitundu yonse, koma Coolidge Effect imatsimikizira kuti ngati zingachitike, amuna amanyalanyaza zolephera zawo ndikupita mpaka atagwa.
Nthawi yobwezeretsa
Mwachionekere, amuna amafunika nthawi kuti abwezeretse mphamvu zawo ndi mphamvu zawo atatha kugonjetsa njira zawo zokhutiritsa kugonana ndi dopamine/zachilendo. Koma kodi chimachitika ndi chiyani kwa ogwiritsa ntchito zolaula pa intaneti masiku ano? Ndi angati omwe akugonjetsa njira zawo zokhutiritsa kugonana—popanda kudzipatsa nthawi yopuma kwa sabata imodzi kuti achire? Nthawi zonse pamakhala “mnzawo” wina wofuna kupatsidwa umuna. Mwachionekere, amuna omwe ali ndi vuto la kugonana chifukwa cha zolaula akasiya kugwiritsa ntchito zolaula amakhala ndi “flatline” yoopsa . Akangochotsa phazi lawo pa mpweya, chilakolako chawo cha kugonana chimagona kwa milungu ingapo—mtundu woopsa wa nthawi yochira ya Sooty.
Chilendo chingapangitse okwatirana kukhala osakongola
Dopamine sikuti imangotulutsidwa chifukwa cha zinthu zatsopano. Chinthu chikakhala chosangalatsa kwambiri kuposa momwe timayembekezera, ubongo umatulutsa dopamine ndipo umayamba kugwedezeka kwambiri. Zolaula za pa intaneti nthawi zonse zimapereka chinthu chosayembekezereka, chinthu chopusa kwambiri.
Mosiyana ndi zimenezi, kugonana ndi wokondedwa wanu sikukhala bwino nthawi zonse kuposa momwe mumayembekezera. Komanso sikumapereka mitundu yosiyanasiyana yosatha. Kumapereka mitundu ina ya mphotho zotonthoza . Mwatsoka, gawo loyambirira la ubongo wanu limatenga kuchuluka kwa dopamine kofanana ndi ntchito ngakhale pamene sikutero.
Zotsatira: Zambiri zopanga zokondweretsa kungachititse mnzanuyo kuoneka ngati ozizira oatmeal. Malingana ndi a phunziro 2007, kumangokhala ndi zithunzi zowonongeka kwazimayi kumapangitsa munthu kuti aziwonetsa wokondedwa wake weniweni. Amamukongoletsa osati chidwi chokha, komanso komanso kutentha komanso nzeru. Ndiponso, pambuyo pa kugwiritsira ntchito zolaula, maphunziro mu phunziro 1988 sananene zakukhutira ndi bwenzi lawo lapamtima-kuphatikizapo kukondana, mawonekedwe, chidwi chogonana, komanso magwiridwe antchito.
Ngakhale zaka makumi angapo zapitazo, kugonana ndi mkazi wokondana, womvera nthawi zambiri kumapereka dopamine yambiri kuposa kuseweretsa maliseche (kachiwiri) kwa mnzake womasewera. Kupatula apo, Abiti Julayi atangokhala "umuna", simunalandireko dopamine kuchokera pama curve ake ampweya. Munayenera kuyembekezera Abiti Ogasiti. Kenako kunadza malo ogulitsa achikulire. Koma kangati mungapite kukaonera kanema womwewo nthawi isanakwane kuti mutenge yatsopano? (Kulipira zolaula ... ndizabwino bwanji.)
Kusaka kosatha
Masiku ano zolaula pa intaneti, zimapatsa ziwombankhanga zopanda malire pakudina mbewa. Mutha kusaka (ntchito ina yotulutsa dopamine) kwa maola ambiri, ndikukumana ndi zibwenzi zambiri zogonana mphindi khumi zilizonse kuposa zomwe makolo anu osaka nyama adakumana nazo pamoyo wawo wonse. Dopamine kugunda pambuyo pa kugunda kwa dopamine kumatha kubweretsa kusintha kosintha kwa mankhwala. (Mwachitsanzo, Cocaine, imayenera kukhala ndi dopamine yochulukirapo yomwe imazungulira muubongo.) Ndi yamphamvu kwambiri kuti ingagonjetse njira zomwe ubongo wanu umakwanitsa kuthana nazo zitatha.
Ndakhala ndikuchita maliseche kuti ndiwonetse zithunzi zolaula kuyambira ndili mwana. Sindinayambe ndakhala ndi vuto ndi ED mpaka pafupi zaka 6 zapitazo. Vuto linayamba ndi mwayi wopita ku zolaula za pa Intaneti zosawunikira. Monga momwe liwiro lagwirizanitsi likuwonjezeka, momwemonso kupezeka kwakukulu kuwona momwe ndingathere. Ndinamaliza kubwereza ubongo wanga kuti ndizidzangokhala ndi maliseche okhaokha. Ndili pachibwenzi ndi mkazi wokongola, wokongola kwa zaka zapitazi za 4 ndipo ndaona kuchepa kwachepisko mu libido yanga ndi kuwuka kwa ED.
Zolaula zopanda vuto lililonse?
Nthawi zambiri mumamva kuti, “Zolaula zakhalapo kwamuyaya, kotero ziyenera kuti sizili zovulaza.” Komabe izi sizikutanthauza kanthu ngati mphamvu yamphamvu ya chinthu chatsopano pa ubongo yamveka bwino. Zolaula za pa intaneti zomwe zilipo masiku ano, maola 24 patsiku, masiku 7 pa sabata, zokhala ndi mitundu yopanda malire sizimangokuthandizani kuthetsa chilakolako chanu chogonana. Zimakupatsani mwayi wopitirira chilakolako chimenecho—mwina ndi zotsatirapo zoipa. Kwa ena, kudziseweretsa maliseche pa intaneti kumakhala kosangalatsa kwambiri kuposa kugonana:
M'malo mongodziseweretsa maliseche, ife anthu odziseweretsa maliseche nthawi zambiri timachita chizolowezi chomwe timachitcha " edging ": kudzibweretsa tokha pafupi ndi kufika pachimake mobwerezabwereza, popanda kutulutsa umuna. Timakhala ndi chilakolako chogonana kwambiri kwa maola ambiri. Ndine wochita nawo magulu angapo a pa intaneti omwe amagwiritsa ntchito maliseche, komanso woyang'anira gulu limodzi.
Ambiri a ife timapita mpaka kusiya kugonana naye, ngakhale pamene wokondedwayo amakhalabepobe ndipo akufunitsitsa. Timagwiritsanso ntchito mawu akuti "zopanda mphamvu" chifukwa cha zomwe zimachitika podziwa zolaula pa intaneti, koma osati kwa wokondedwa.
Eya! Njira yosinthira zinthu yomwe cholinga chake ndi kuwonjezera ana ndi majini awo ingachititse ogwiritsa ntchito zolaula kutali ndi anzawo enieni? Inde, chifukwa njirayo imagwira ntchito pa dopamine. Ubongo wanu umaganiza kuti ngati china chake chikukupangitsani kukhala ndi chilakolako chofuna kugonana, chiyenera kukhala mwayi wopatsa umuna (ngakhale wofunika kutenga zoopsa, kale).
Kodi Zotsatira za Coolidge zikubweretsa "kutha kwa anyamata?"
Pokhapokha mutamvetsa momwe ubongo wa Coolidge Effect umagwirira ntchito, zomwe zimakulimbikitsani kuti mupondere mpweya ngakhale mutakhala ndi zambiri, zimakhala zovuta kulumikiza chilakolako chosakhutitsidwa ndi mfundo yakuti ubongo wanu ukukula pang'onopang'ono chifukwa cha dopamine yambiri. Kupatula apo, zingamveke ngati chilakolako chanu sichikukhutitsidwa. Mkhalidwewu ndi wodabwitsa chifukwa chakuti chilakolako champhamvu cha zolaula zambiri poyamba chimamveka ngati yankho la mavuto aliwonse okhudzana ndi kugonana.
Koma zoona zake n'zakuti kusakhutira komwe kumachitika mu ubongo chifukwa cha mankhwala a ubongo kungakupangitseni kufuna kusangalala kwambiri. Chizindikiro chakuti thermostat yanu ya libido yasinthidwa ndichakuti mukufunika zolaula pa intaneti kuti mukonze bwino kapena kuti musiye kugonana. (Inde, kale, anyamata amangodziseweretsa maliseche mosavuta mpaka kufika pachimake popanda zolaula .)
Zizindikiro zina zingakhale kusakhazikika, kukwiya ndi kusakhutira, chilakolako chofuna kugonana mopitirira muyeso, kupeza mnzanu wosakongola kapena wosangalatsa kuposa intaneti, kapena kufunikira zinthu zoopsa kwambiri. Akatswiri amatcha zotsatira zotere " kulolerana ." Zingasonyeze kuti ubongo ukuyamba kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo.
Philip Zimbardo
Mwachitsanzo, onerani nkhani ya mphindi zisanu iyi ya TED ya 'The Demise of Guys?' yolembedwa ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo wotchuka Philip Zimbardo pamene akufotokoza momwe "chizolowezi chofuna kusangalala ndi kugonana" chikukhudzira mbadwo wonse. Munthu wina wogwiritsa ntchito zolaula yemwe akuchira anati:
Ndidavutika ndi zambiri zomwe amalankhula mu kanemayu. Chiyambireni kusiya zolaula kudzionetsera kwatsika. Ndimaba nthabwala zoseketsa ndipo ndimalankhula bwino osaganizira zomwe ndikunena kapena kuda nkhawa kuti ena adzatani. Ubale wanga ndi bwenzi langa ladzakhalanso laumwini popeza makoma ena omwe ndidayika tsopano akugwa. Kanema wabwino kwambiri.
Mavuto ambiri amayamba ndi Coolidge Effect yochokera ku zinthu zatsopano—njira yopezera chitsimikizo chakuti muchita ntchito yanu ngati anzanu okonda kugonana alipo, ngakhale mutagonana kale mokwanira. Majini anu sasamala zomwe zimachepetsa nkhawa yanu, kuteteza thanzi lanu, kapena kusunga ubale wanu. Amakulimbikitsani kuti mutenge njira yomwe imatulutsa dopamine yambiri. Munthu wokonda kugonana akakupemphani, ubongo wanu umaganiza kuti muli mu bizinesi yofalitsa majini. Ndicho chinthu chofunika kwambiri—mosasamala kanthu za kuwonongeka kwa zinthu zina.
* Deta yomwe ili yoyamba pamwambayi inachotsedwa kufukufuku pa nkhosa, osati makoswe-kotero nkhosa zamphongo ziyenera kufaniziridwa m'malo mwake. Komabe, zotsatira zomwezo zawonetsedwanso mu makoswe.
- Mndandanda wa zofukufuku zomwe zimasonyeza kusonyeza zolaula kwa anthu komanso kukhala ndi zibwenzi zogonana
- Watsopano: Amuna Ambiri Ambiri Ambiri Ambiri, Ambiri Ambiri a Motile, Ndi Ofulumira Pamene Akuwonetsedwa kwa Zithunzi za Akazi Ambiri (2015)
- Mndandanda wa Kafukufuku Pezani Kuchuluka (ndi Kuzolowera) mu Ogwiritsa Ntchito Zolaula
- Nucleus accumbens dopamine imachulukitsa chilakolako chogonana pogwiritsa ntchito makoswe amphongo (2018)